


To Hold a Candle To

by UrieNanashi



Category: Captain America - All Media Types, Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel) - All Media Types, Thor (Movies)
Genre: ? - Freeform, Alternate Universe - Road Trip, Asexuality, Asperger Syndrome, BAMF Clint Barton, BAMF Darcy Lewis, Canon-Typical Violence, Captain America: The Winter Soldier, Clint Barton & Natasha Romanov Friendship, Darcy Lewis's Taser, Darcy Lewis-centric, Deaf Character, Deaf Clint Barton, Demisexuality, F/M, Gen, Getting to Know Each Other, Hydra (Marvel), Magical Realism, Natasha Romanov Is a Good Bro, Original Character(s), Scientist Wrangler Darcy Lewis, Slow Burn, world building
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-10-26
Updated: 2020-03-31
Packaged: 2021-01-03 09:36:26
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 21
Words: 46,810
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21177272
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/UrieNanashi/pseuds/UrieNanashi
Summary: “In my defense this was set up super last minute. But really, Illuminati? I work for the FBI.” He chuckled a little.“Bullshit you do.”He stopped abruptly, tilting his head to look at her. Darcy reassessed, he maybe wasn’t as forgettable as she’d though. He had some crazy looking eyes... “Darcy Lewis, right?” He asked dropping all pretense.....“Need me to walk you back?” a cheerful voice called from behind.Darcy flipped him off over her shoulder.-----------Or- Darcy Lewis had a life before New Mexico. She's got her own weirdness going on. After the events of Winter Soldier she ends up on an unwanted road trip with Hawkeye.





	1. Prologue

Darcy was sick. 

Because of course she was.

It was early morning. Like ass crack of dawn early, and she was sick. As the second semester of her sophomore year of college drew to a close, finals loomed ominously on the horizon. Her first one was bright and early 8 AM next Monday. Her advisor had emailed her last night to inform her she was missing six science credits, she had a cold, it was early, and she was sitting outside on the cold stone steps of the science building with a roll of tape in her fleece coat pocket. 

Darcy watched a man and his dog jogging across the far side of the field before her. Unbidden the thought ‘but at what cost?’ flashed through her mind. Jesus she would die if she had to exercise so early in the morning. 

She yawned. The sky was still mostly dark and the cafe hadn’t even been open yet when she’d left the dorm so she had no coffee. She was going to have to run by after this and grab a cup and a bagel. Darcy glanced at her phone for the time then stuffed her hands back into the warm fleece pockets of her coat. She hoped this didn’t go on forever because she did actually have class today. And naturally her World History 2 class was on the opposite side of campus. 

Darcy waited. And sniffled. Probably should have brought tissues. 

She tapped her foot while a girl on a bike sped past. 

Twenty minutes pass before a petite woman, arms full of paper, came marching down the street. She passed Darcy with purposeful steps and headed up the stairs at full speed. Darcy turned slightly to watch as the woman reached the main doors. She tucked her stack of papers under her chin and reached with her free hand for the door handle. She tugged but the door didn’t open. Darcy heard her swearing softly as she groped blindly for the visitor card clipped to her pant waist. She fumbled. 

The papers went flying. The woman let out a long string of curses and Darcy pulled herself up from her stoop and grabbed a couple of flyers before the wind took them. The tiny brunette dropped to her knees and began snatching papers back up. “Thank you.” She huffed when she noticed Darcy. 

“Here.” Darcy beeped the door with her student ID and pull it open with a strong tug when the light flashed green. The two hurried inside to straighten the wrinkled papers.  
“Thank you.” The woman said again, placing her pile on the skinny table below the cork message board. She dusted her pants and stuck out her hand, “Jane Foster.” 

Darcy took it. “Darcy Lewis.” 

“Thank you again for the help.” Jane said, picking up one of her flyers and then freezing. She stared at the blank space on the message board and took a deep breath through her nose.  
A little amused Darcy stuck her hand in her pocket and pulled out the little roll of scotch tape. 

“No problem.” She dismissed the thanks, “Here, need tape?” She asked innocently. 

Jane turned to her in relief. “Yes! Thank you!” Jane took the roll and plastered her flyer up with an exorbitant amount of tape. Like, way more than she needed. “You a science major? Here.” Jane said, stuffing one of the flyers into Darcy’s hand before she’d even finished her question. 

“Something like that.” Darcy agreed vaguely, skimming the words quickly. An Internship offer in New Mexico. Offering science credits. 

“Would you mind if I used this for the rest of them?” Jane asked shaking the roll of tape. 

“No. Go ahead. I can help, actually, if you want?” Darcy glanced at her phone again, “I still have like an hour before I need to get to class.” 

“That would be great!” Jane smiled passing Darcy a large stack of the fliers. They walked down the hall together, Darcy leading the way towards other bulletin boards. The movement activated the motion sensor lights so it wasn’t so creepy dark but it was very quiet with no one else in the building. Science wasn’t Darcy’s thing but she was sure this place was usually packed. Their footsteps echoed a bit on the tile. 

“So you’re a scientists?” Darcy asked awkwardly. Because like, duh, of course she was. She was in the science building. 

“Astrophysicist.” Jane nodded ripping long lengths of tape off the roll. Jesus. Darcy grabbed the tape from her, tore a small piece and formed it into a loop before passing that back. Jane took it absentmindedly. 

“Cool.” Darcy said. 

Working together it only took twenty minutes or so to plaster all the boards with fliers. With a ridiculous amount of extra’s left, Jane took to sticking them on any flat surface available. Like doors, blank walls, display cases. The goal seemed to be to cover as much space as possible within the building so that there was no possible way any person could walk through it and not notice the fliers. Just for giggles Darcy taped one dead-smack in the middle of a hallway floor. Jane departed looking less frazzled then she had storming up the building, thanking Darcy again for her help.  
Darcy waved a short farewell then ran back to the café and just managed to squeeze in to her history class before the bell. 

Somehow despite the absolutely insane number of fliers Darcy had helped Jane plaster over every inch of the science building, Darcy was the only one to apply. She got the internship. Of course she did.


	2. Chapter 1

Jane had explained to her in the beginning of her internship that a lot Jane’s work was capturing, documenting, and analyzing tiny _minuscule pieces_ of data to support her theory. A theory, some quick googling taught Darcy, that most of the scientific community had laughed off as completely fucking ludicrous. Commenters on Jane Foster’s work seem to agree that she had more than a few screws loose. It was admirable really that all the vitriol had done was turn a Jane into a frantic kind of spiteful work demon.

It was time consuming, grueling work, with very little support and very slow, small advancements.

For Darcy, it was honestly pretty boring. It was hard to deny that Jane needed an assistant though. The woman scribbled on napkins and whiteboards and never slowed down to document anything she was doing and Darcy might not be a science major but she was pretty sure documenting your steps was important. Luckily Darcy could make a mean spreadsheet and she was pretty good at transcribing data too. And Darcy did get to be in New Mexico, which was cool. She hadn’t travel a whole lot in her life so even being in a new state was kind of exciting. Still, it was just- lots to do, all of it boring.

At least that was true until they literally hit some guy with their car in the middle of a desert sand storm. Well no- Jane hit him. No '_they_' or '_we_' involved. Just Jane. Darcy had nothing to do with it. She was definitely not responsible or liable or whatever for any damages or injury.

Thor was huge.

Like, he was a huge guy. Darcy wasn’t short the way Jane was but he made her feel positively tiny in comparison. She was pretty sure his hand could wrap around her head and crush it like a grape. He had freaked her out at first, raving and angry when they had found him and Darcy was still not entirely sure he wasn’t crazy but whatever. She wasn’t sorry she’d tased him but once he’d calmed down a bit he was pretty cool. Had some wicked story telling skills. Darcy sat at the kitchen island, listening to a fascinating tale involving more apparently real Norse gods and giant flying worms from another dimension. Sorry, ‘realm’. It was great stuff. She often got these story telling sessions to herself because Jane was a grouch when her slumber was disturbed before 9.

“With the beast defeated, we feasted for four nights.” He finished smiling wistfully. Darcy clapped a little and he smiled more genuinely. “Thank you for breaking fast with me, Lady Darcy.” There was something regal in the way he nodded to her even sitting there in Jane’s ex’s jeans and tee. That poor shirt struggling desperately to contain the dude’s jacked guns.

Darcy had a hard time believing that someone could commit to speaking the way Thor spoke without making some kind of slip eventually. But he hadn’t so far- no matter what he always answered in that weird sort of off version of old English. And they’d hit the dude in the middle of a fucking sand storm where Jane swore there was some type of anomaly going on. So what did Darcy know? Who was she to say ancient gods weren’t real? And the guy was like a puppy. Endlessly curious, unintentionally messy, and a real people lover. So he couldn’t be all bad even if he was crazy.  
“No problem dude.” She twirled her fork for a moment. Darcy hopped off the stool and headed over to rinse her plate in the sink. It had been a weird couple of days what with having found an Ancient Norse God in the desert in the middle of a sand storm and all but she had gotten pretty good over the years at just taking things as they came.

So she was cool with Thor.

What she was _not_ so cool with was unmarked supposedly government vehicles pulling up and trying to take Jane’s stuff. The tiny ball of rage disguising herself as Darcy’s boss squared herself up, planted her feet in the sand and give a nasty scowl to the blandest looking man Darcy had ever seen in her life. Dude looked like white bread would be too exotic for him. Jane was spitting mad and Darcy calculated a good change that she might just deck the guy right in his bland face.

Some part of Darcy kind of wanted to go grab popcorn and watch the Tasmanian devil trapped inside Jane be unleashed on these government flunkies. A bigger part of her was just as pissed though. This was Jane’s life’s work they were stealing- yeah, not ‘_confiscating_’, stealing. And they had kidnapped fucking Thor who Darcy was starting to like. Plus hello, they claimed to be F.B.I. or some shit but none of their vehicles were marked and no one had shown Darcy any I.D. The smell of bullshit these people were emitting was fucking unbelievable. “You dickwads took my fucking iPod too?! What possible reason could you have to do that?!”

Mr. Bland, Suit Bland, glanced over at her in disinterest. “We apologize for any inconvenience –"

“Inconvenience!!?!” Jane spit like a swear. “Incon- Inconvenience?!” She looked to be near vibrating with fury and Darcy almost wondered if she was about to go full Super Saiyan.

“Ms. Foster –“

“Doctor! It’s Dr. Foster.” Darcy hissed at him with narrowed eyes.

Erik fluttered nervously in the background, asking all too sensible questions about what steps they could take to get their things back and who they needed to talk to and whatever. All the yelling and arguing proved useless. The guys had big guns they carried in full view or Darcy might have full on tackled one of them. In the end, they take everything. The three of them; Jane, Erik, and Darcy stand together and watched the entourage of black vans drive off into the desert. “Illuminati shit heads!” Darcy yelled after them as loud as she fucking could.

It was a bad night.

They all climbed up to the roof aimless in their anger. Jane rage cried while Erik feebly attempted to console her, rubbing her back gently in circles with a large hand. Darcy raided the cabinets and brought several bottles of booze up and they all got thoroughly smashed together.

The fury of losing all their equipment and data was only compounded by their worry for Thor. Darcy was a political scientist, she knew what kind of dick bag the government could be when detaining people- if those people had even been the government and not a drug cartel or some shit. She was determined they weren’t going to be able to just disappear Thor. Just as soon as she was done drinking. Tomorrow. She’d do something tomorrow. Things got a little blurry from there. Tequila flowed. There was some yelling fruitlessly into the desert about government shit heads at some point. Might have been some pirate shanty singing too.

It got cold at night in the desert and she woke the next morning shivering slightly still on the roof. Jane was totally out on one of the beach chairs but there was no sign of Erik. Darcy tucked a blanket around Jane and went to get some Tylenol for her own killer headache. Hangovers were the worst.

She needed to go into town too which was just dandy timing all around.

It could wait a few minutes she decided and went to take a shower. Give the pain killers a chance to kick in. Teeth brushed, clean, dressed, and headache a little abated Darcy snatched her purse. Leaving Tylenol on the counter with a glass of water for Jane she headed, still fuming mad, into town. Her fingers twitched for her laptop. She was going to to fry all their servers, set fire to their storage room, shove a triangle up their butts. Something.

She stomped the few blocks to the only convenience store in town.

The man behind the counter took one look at the scowl on her face and wisely left her to her own devises. She picked up a little basket and grabbed some twizzlers, more Tylenol, potato chips, a half-gallon of milk, and a small box of cereal. Batteries were 20% off. She snatched up a pack at random then checked out. Bag in hand she stomped back towards the now hallowed out remains of the lab.

There was a man sitting outside on one of the wooden benches reading a newspaper.

Darcy scowled. She contemplated. She set off at a steady pace, eyes fixed determinately past him. Her fingers twitched slightly at her sides and she desperately missed her iPod. Music would probably go a long way to soothing her mood. That thing had cost her a fucking fortune and those fucking shit heads just-. Her jaw clenched in irritation.

As she drew almost even with the man on the bench there was a loud horrendous screeching sound. The man clutched his left ear. “Fuck,” He swore.

She stopped in front of him and watched him wincing in pain. Cargo pants, nondescript black t-shirt. He had that generic blonde, nondescript jock look about him. Handsome enough but not overtly memorable. Darcy reached into her little plastic bag and seized the pack of batteries. They were the tiny circular kind. Of course they were. She flung them at the man’s feet and a small puff of dirt and sand floated up. “For your ear-piece Illuminati dickwad.” She sneered.

He blinked up at her one hand still pressed to his ear. “Illuminati?” he asked squinting at her in confusion. He made no move to pick up the batteries.

Darcy decided she hated him on principal. She nodded to the now forgotten crinkled newspaper and raised an unimpressed eyebrow. “Who under seventy five reads the fucking _newspaper_ anymore?”

The man rubbed the back of his neck sheepishly. “In my defense this was set up super last minute. But really, Illuminati? I work for the FBI.” He chuckled a little.

“Bullshit you do.”

He stopped abruptly, tilting his head to look at her. Darcy reassessed, he maybe wasn’t as forgettable as she’d though. He had some crazy looking eyes. There was a hint of a smile forming around his mouth that made her scowl deepen. “Darcy Lewis, right?” He asked dropping all pretense.

Darcy didn’t answer that.

She was tempted to tase him but also really didn’t want to end up in some underground illegal jail. So instead she turned deliberately away from him and started back off toward the lab, or the hollowed out remains of the lab anyway. Her chest was hot with anger. Her determination to do something redoubled. She was certain someone else in the Rising Tide would be eager to help her fuck up some shady government organizations security. She was going to crash their shit.

“Need me to walk you back?” a cheerful voice called from behind.

Darcy flipped him off over her shoulder.

+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=  
(Darcy- Age 13)

Darcy Lewis sat out on the steps of an old house on a surprisingly gross day in August. She’s been thirteen for fifteen days now but it was already looking like it was going to be the worst year of her life yet. The house behind her was an ugly little Cape Cod style, the paint was faded, shabby yellow and the yard mostly overgrown. The sun was devilishly hot that day. The humidity made her hair curl into an untamable mess. Aidan has just enlisted in the army.

Darcy picked harshly at the hem of her jean shorts. The oversized band shirt she was wearing was one of Aidan’s. She didn’t know their music but the logo was cool.  
No one else was outside in this kind of weather so the rundown neighborhood was eerily quiet. Even the Johnson twins who were always out playing basketball had retreated inside hours ago. Darcy sat on the run-down wooden stairs, waiting.

She swatted half-heartedly at a bug circling her head. The cracked driveway might be sizzling. Or maybe the heat had fried her eardrums or brain or something. Both seemed equally plausible. On the far end over the street, at the intersection of Chaplin Lane and Martin Street, an old RV camper turned on and came bumbling down the road. It had seen better days she could tell as it drew steadily nearer to the house.

Darcy stood up, hovering indecisively on the top of the wooden steps. She squinted and wiped sweat from her brow with a grimace. As the RV pulled into the drive, narrowly avoiding a pot hole, Darcy took a step down. And another. Eyes fixed on the RV. The last of the steps creaked and shifted under foot, sending her sprawling down. Her knees and hands scuffed the cement walk with stinging pain. "Fuck." She hissed quietly.

The RV door opened and slammed closed.

Darcy pulled herself up, scowling at the stinging pain. She was bleeding and there were little rocks stuck in her palm. Ugh.

Darcy glanced up.

An elderly woman was giving her a look from beside the RV. She was rail thin, short shaved hair stark white against her light brown skin. She looks thoroughly unimpressed as Darcy pushed herself up off the ground. "Trippin over your own feet girl? You need sumin for that?" She nodded at Darcy’s bleeding knee. Blood was beginning to drip down towards her beat-up sneakers.

"I'm fine." She hissed in annoyance. Carefully, she brushed some of the peddles out of her hand. It stung like crazy and some of the deeper stuck ones remained in place to spite her.

"I look like boo boo the fool to you? Got to wash that out. Come here." The woman stomped towards the back of the RV and flung its tiny door open. She snapped when Darcy didn’t move, "Hurry up now!"

Licking dry lips, Darcy hobbled over. She peaked her head cautiously around the door- everything was tiny and cramped of course. Not dirty though, just old. The women was digging around in one of the mini kitchen drawers. "Sit." She commanded in a husky voice. She pointed a finger at the tiny little table. Darcy shuffled in and sat uncomfortably. It smelled funny, not like cigarettes or anything just like some kind of weird cleaning fragrance or perfume or something. Darcy wrinkled her nose. Soon she was handed a damp wash cloth to clean her hands and knee. A couple different sized Band-Aids were thrown down on the rickety table too. Then the old lady lowered herself into a seat on the opposite side of the table with a groan. She gazed at Darcy with deep eyes.

  
Darcy avoided the woman’s stare, quickly whipping at her hands and knees before grabbed a couple of Band-Aids and undoing the wrappers. The old woman pursed her lips. "What you doing here girl? Sittin on those steps?" She asked. She had a weird accent Darcy couldn’t place.

"Waiting." Darcy replied irritably. She should have just stayed home.

The woman hummed. Her pale green eyes stared at Darcy’s face. Darcy kept own eyes on her bleeding hands, working on placing Band-Aids over the scuff wounds. "You an idiot?"

"Wha- no!" Darcy scowled.

The woman raised an eyebrow. "Yeh, you are." she said definitively with a slight nod, "Goin alone with peoples you don’t know."

"You’re an old woman!"

"So? Wha'if I had a gun?"

Darcy felt cold all of a sudden. Uncertain. Why had she followed this weird lady anyway? "You don’t." She stuck her chin out boldly.

The woman laughed. "Might ‘have done though.” She sounded far too amused for Darcy’s taste. _What a fucking weirdo_. The woman leaned back in her a seat a bit. “Ain't you got no one teaching you girl?"

Darcy glared harder. So maybe her school grades weren't the best, Darcy wasn't stupid. "Yeah ok, whatever Lady." She muttered. “I wasn’t looking for your advice.” _And at least I can speak fucking English correctly. ‘Ain’t no one?’ Jesus._

The woman snorted, "That about right?" She stood again, grabbing Darcy’s used wrappers and stuffing them in a bin. Then she opened another drawer. Darcy resisted the urge to get up, suddenly wondering if maybe crazy lady did have a gun or something. But she just came back with a moderately sized black box and slid it across the little table to Darcy. "For you." She said seriously.

"What?" Darcy asked irritated, still smarting from landing on the pavement. She didn’t need some random old lady's junk. She scowled again.

"Take it!" The woman snapped.

_What-fucking-ever_. Rather than argue Darcy grabbed the box and made for the door. She would regret it years later- but Darcy charged out the little RV door and headed off down the street without another word. She swore she could hear the old woman laughing.

She got two houses down, back towards her own house, before the RV bumbles past her. She stops and watches it pull ahead, further and further down the street. And then it was gone. And Darcy realized that house she'd been sitting at hadn’t belong to that old lady either.

She would later find that the little black box held a taser tucked neatly inside that she would use many years later to take down the god of thunder himself.


	3. Chapter 2

Clint was on top of a roof at the edge of town.

He had eyes trained on the giant metal cyclops robot that was blasting this little town apart. He wished he could say it surprised him but Clint’s seen a lot of weird shit with S.H.E.I.L.D. over the years. He did kind of wish Nat was here and not in South Africa though, she would have gotten a kick out of it. “Target heading east. It’s a slow motherfucker at least.” It launched a blast of fire that obliterated the small convenience store’s front. “We sure this isn’t one of Starks?”

Coulson acknowledged in his ear. “We have specialists analyzing now to confirm but we don’t believe so.” He relayed calmly.

Clint’s eye was drawn away from the rampage by a flash of movement on the street. “Shit. We’ve got civilians in the active zone.” Where the fuck was Thompson? Wasn’t he supposed to have evacuated everyone by now? Clint shimmied down the side of the building, opting to jump into a roll for the last few feet to save time. He recognized her of course. Darcy Lewis running straight at him, something wiggling in her arms. He puts on his best calm, authoritative Agent voice. “Ma’am, come with me. We can help you evacuate.”

“Sure.” The woman panted breathlessly, thrusting the thing in her arms at him. Clint’s arms came up automatically. His arms were covered by tactical gear but he could feel soft fur with his fingers around the gaps in his hand guards.

Now relieved of her burden the woman turned and headed back towards town at a jog. “Lewis!” He called after her, still a little thrown off by the live animal that has been dumped into his arms. Coulson must have alerted another agent to the possible civilian in need of escort because Matthews showed up behind him. Clint pushed the tiny dog at him, “Hot potato.”

“Sir?!”

Clint ignored him, gave the little dog a gently pat on the head and hurried back up to the roof he had abandoned. It didn’t take her long to spot her dodging debris and fire. She was headed back to the Animal Shelter. Huh. Gutsy for a civilian. He was a little impressed. Clint let Coulson know to expect more animals to evacuate and turned his focus back to the main target.  
+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=

Thor leaves abruptly in a burst of rainbow light.

All that remained was an intricate design burned into desert sand that began to fade immediately with a gust of wind. The rainbow light burned a blinding column into her eyelids she saw whenever she blinked. Which was…nifty. Though possibly indicative of eye damage it was cool that possibly interdimensional space travel bridge said ‘Gay Rights!’ though.

The silence that followed was so abrupt it was eerie. Buildings creaked softly, hanging debris shifting in the wind. A few small fires were still burning. For those few moments it was like standing in a post-apocalyptic world. Everything broken and burnt and quiet.

And then the parade of black SUV’s showed up like sunglass wearing mothers to put pick up the mess. The doors opened in impressive unison. Agents dispersed from the van in various directions like ants. She, Jane and Erik were herded toward the back of an unmarked ambulance and were looked over by a few EMTs.

Darcy drained a large bottle of water while Jane pushed off the offered shock blanket. The metal beneath her was shockingly cool. She fiddled with the now empty bottles label. Her fingers ached. She was bleeding just a little. Just scrapes.

The sea of anonymous bland peons scurrying about parted briefly and two figures approached the ambulance. This one Darcy recognized. Mr. Bland was back. He looked just the same as he had the last time they had seen him. She wondered if he slept in that suit. Or maybe he was a robot and just went into stand-by mode with it on. He wasn’t alone this time though in his approach. Darcy thought she recognized the guy standing behind him as that one jerk who had followed her into town. If moving her face hadn’t felt like way too much work for the moment she would have frowned. Honestly, Darcy was too tired to deal with more of that bullshit now so decided she’d just let Jane yell at them.

Jane didn’t disappoint.

The woman EMT, whose name Darcy didn’t know, examined the scratch marks Darcy had gotten while trying to force open animal cages in a panic. The antiseptic goop didn’t even sting when it was rubbed on her bruised hands. Her throat still felt dry and raw from all the smoke she’d inhaled though. Sounds weren’t really translating into words for her but the arguing seemed to be going more in their favor this time around. Apparently they were giving Jane back her stuff. Like they should be fucking grateful they were giving back stuff that they had stolen. Darcy wanted to scoff. Now they want to try getting on our good side? Although she couldn’t be bothered to engage with them Darcy did manage to find the energy in her to flip them off when they left. Illuminati shitheads.

True to their word though, once they were all released from medical and finish signing a crap ton of Non-Disclosure Agreements, they walked back to the lab to find it full of all the equipment that had been taken. Jane was happy. Darcy’s brain was still stuck on you know, the alien attack. Thankfully though, even Jane was too exhausted to work that night and the three of them hunkered down to sleep. Even for Darcy it had been a weird fucking day.

Jesus.

She woke the next morning to aching muscles and bruises and judging by the way both Erik and Jane were slowly puttering around, she wasn’t the only one. It was quiet. An uncertain feeling drifting in the air. Things had changed and yet they hadn’t. Darcy’s eye caught the date when she passed the old marked up calendar on the fridge. There was a little X marked at the end of the month that was steadily approaching.

With her equipment and data returned Jane was driven like never before which Darcy supposed made sense, she had a sexy space alien prince boyfriend to find after all. Erik, typically the saner of the two, was nearly as bad. The two of them stuck to the lab like barbs to a nosy dog. (Darcy’s iPod was still mysteriously missing which majorly pissed her off. Just fricken typical.) Darcy sat in the background, typing up hand written notes and wipe board equations, organizing data from some of the instruments, and plying her scientists with coffee and Poptarts. And sometimes when Jane got stuck or frustrated, Darcy would hover over her shoulder for a little while until an idea popped into her friends head and she took off again.

It was a really weird feeling to go to bed and know that all of this was almost over. That the days were counting down. So much had changed, how could it just –end? It just didn’t feel like it was possible. Part of her felt like she had always been here with Jane and Erik.

But end it did.

On the last night of her internship Jane threw her a little farewell party. It was just her, Erik and Darcy of course but Jane bought some cupcakes from the grocery and put up a few streamers. It was a little pathetic to look at. Darcy couldn’t have been more touched. She grabbed Jane in a hug then busted out the tequila.

“What am I going to do without you?” Jane whined a little sloppily. A few drinks always made Jane kind of cuddly. She hung on to Darcy’s arm and put her chin on her shoulder. There was a major pout on her face that warmed Darcy’s heart. Erik had passed out in the recliner and was snoring loudly. Darcy hugged back as best she could with Jane wrapped around her like a python. It was disquieting to realize just how much she was going to miss this. Because Jesus was she going to miss this. Miss them. Darcy didn’t make friends easily but both Jane and Erik had come to mean a whole fucking lot to her. “Dar-cy! What am I going to do?!” Jane repeated.

“I mean, I have two more years’ but- I could apply again once I graduate? If you would still want an assistant?” Darcy offered cautiously.

Jane blinked sleepily at her. Darcy gently grabbed her half empty solo cup before she dropped it and placed it on the counter. Jane grabbed her hand and looked angry. “Talk’in ‘bout?” she shook Darcy’s limp arm. “Course your coming back! I just meant – in the meantime. What am I supposed to do?!” Darcy blinked and Jane shook her arm harder. It flopped about in Jane’s grasp. “You’re comin back.”

Darcy blinked again and smiled. “Yeah. I mean, obviously, Janie.”

Jane and Erik both hug her fiercely at the airport. Past security she found a seat by her gate and pulled out her boarding pass to double check the flight number for the third time. Yes. She was at the right gate. Just like the other two times she had checked. A buzzing in her pocket had her fishing out her phone, if it was Jane she was just going to have to ship Darcy whatever it was she’d forgotten. But it wasn’t Jane, it was her dad. “Hey dad.”

“Darc’.” There was a pregnant pause, neither of them quite sure what to say. “Haven’t heard from you in a while. How’s the internship going?”

Darcy fiddled with her purse straps and chewed on her lip searching for words. A large family passed by all dragging wheeled luggage. It was kind of hard to focus when the airport was so loud. How to even- how to even summarize? “Uh- it was great. I’m, I’m actually at my gate. At the airport. But it was great.”

“Oh. Well, I’m glad it went well.”

“Yeah.”

“Holidays are coming up soon.” He said which, '_not really_' Darcy thought. “You planning on coming home? We’d love to see you.”

“Yeah I’m not sure yet. I’ll let you know? Dad, I’ve got to go. We’re going to start boarding soon.”

Brief silence. “Sure. Alright. I love you.”

“I love you too.” She answered stiffly. Darcy stuffed the phone back in her pocket, swung her purse over her shoulder and went to get a cup of black coffee.

It was strange to be back on the Culver campus.

Or maybe she was the weird one. Things just didn’t fit the way they had before she left. The dorm was too crowded and loud. The stars at night were faded and hard to see with all the ambient light pollution. Sometimes she jumped at loud noises and there was no one she was allowed to talk about it with. It was a little late to change her major now but as junior year began Darcy squeezed in classes for data analysis on top of her political justice classes. She texted Jane daily. Skyped when Jane had access to decent enough Wi-Fi. Classes dragged by slowly.

She didn’t get to see Jane the following summer to the great annoyance of them both. Darcy spent the time working to save up some kind of cash, the weight of student loans already hanging over her. She splurged just a little at the start of senior year and got herself a cloth scroll with a Thurisaz rune which was apparently Thor’s rune. It hung with honor on the back of her dorm door. Senior year flew and with the help of the science credits earned with Jane she was able to graduate early too. Darcy debated whether to bother walk or not. Graduating early meant the few friends she had made weren’t going to be in the crowd so it felt a little silly but her parents both wanted pictures so in the end she decided she would just do it.

So early on a spring morning she pulled on a simply dress and her tacky robe and hat. As she was putting the finishing touches on her eyeliner there was a knock on her door. Darcy frowned and went to pull it open. “Congratulations!” Jane grinned at her. Darcy laughed in surprise and pulled her in for a big hug. Jane was still beaming at her when they separated, “Erik’s sorry he couldn’t make it.” She told her passing Darcy a card. Darcy’s parents hadn’t been able to get the time off, or probably the money, for a flight down and a hotel so she’d been certain she would be walking without an audience but Jane had come all on her own. Darcy hugged her again.

The graduation ceremony took forever. Mostly it was incredibly boring. She was anxious the entire time for it just to be over so she could go see Jane but it was worth it when she walked across the stage and Jane screamed like a maniac over all the polite clapping. Jane hugged her again afterword and thrust a piece of folded paper at her. “Say yes.”

Eyebrows furrowed Darcy unfolded it curiously. “A job offer?” She asked in disbelief. Jane stared at her hopefully and nodded.

“I can’t pay you a lot but-“

Darcy didn’t let her get farther then that- just threw herself at the smaller woman. Darcy didn’t need any sort of request to tell her what the right choice here was.

+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=  
(Darcy- age 7)

Aidan was 5 years older than Darcy. He had a thinner build then she did; tall, with dark hair that held just a hint more of a red hue underneath. Their faces looked similar though. You could tell looking at them that they were related.

Dad said sometimes it was like Aidan was trying to outrun the world. It was cool, when he wasn’t being an annoying fart-face. By comparison Darcy kind of bumbled around in the background of life. But she’s seven so she thinks that’s fair. She’s got ages before she grows up and has to like, figure out taxes and jobs and stuff.

Lots of people in her class at school complain about their siblings. Said that they steal their stuff or tattle on their parents or were just generally the worst. Most of the time though, Darcy liked Aidan. He let her hang out with him even when he had his friends over and he hid her eyes when movie showed really bad parts and he helped her find where Mom hid the good snacks and stuff.  
She and Aidan share a lot. Not just appearance, but shoes, and toys, and stuff. Darcy doesn’t mind so much. He liked the same kinds of colors she did so it wasn’t so bad. Mom says Darcy is a ‘mimicker’ though. Says she’s too much like Aidan. Copying and learning bad habits. “Look what you’ve taught your sister!” she said when she was mad even though Darcy was being the naughty one.

She and Aidan share. It had always been that way. They shared everything. Even the _thing_….Darcy didn’t know what it was. They weren’t supposed to talk about it really. Aidan always said it was because mom was like an ostrich. “She thinks if we all stick our heads in the sand and ignore it, it will somehow stop existing.” All Darcy knew was that she didn’t remember a time without it…

  
She does remember waking from her sleep one night disturbed for reasons she couldn't place. Darcy tended to sleep like the dead so she frowned and rolled over when she found herself unable to fall back asleep. She had looked around her dark room at the overflowing bookshelf and her basket of stuffed animals, uncertain and uncomfortable. She wondered for a moment where her backpack was then remembered she’d left it at the kitchen table after finally finishing her math homework.

Darcy rearranged the blankets a little and stuck a foot out.

She closed her eyes but she just didn’t feel sleepy anymore. Really she kind of wanted to get up and run around or something. She opened her eyes and tapped her foot restlessly. The window near her bed was open just a crack and she could feel a soft cool breeze whistling in. Darcy stared at the window, running her hands over her slightly fuzzy blanket. 1-2, 3-4, 5-6 top window panes, 7-8, 9-10, 11-12 bottom window panes. 13-14, 15- 16 for the sides of the window. 17- 18 for the front and back. She liked it when it ended on even numbers. Darcy sighed unhappily. The little clock on her nightstand said it was past 10 now. Pushing back the large fuzzy blanket covering her, Darcy slipped from her bed quietly and cracked open her bedroom door. She could hear the TV from downstairs. Her parents listening to the news in the living room like they did most nights.

A look across the hall showed the light was on in Aidan’s room, she could see the little glow beneath the door. Slipping past the staircase on socked feet she poked her head around her brother’s door and he glanced up from a book to frown at her. "What are you doing up?"

Darcy shrugged. Fingers playing with the hem of her pajama shirt. "Stomach hurts." She told him looking around the room. Aidan’s bedroom was bigger than hers but she had the bigger closet. There were clothes all over the floor she was pretty sure Aidan told mom he had picked up.

"Want me to get mom?" Aiden asked grimacing, placing his book down and sitting up on his bed. Darcy shook her head. "You sure?" He asked. Darcy nodded insistently. Aiden tilted his head just a fraction, watching her closely. He nodded a little to himself and patted the bit of empty bed beside him. "Come on. I'll read to you a bit. Your ganna be tired if you’re up too late. You have school tomorrow."

"So do you." Darcy muttered a little petulantly and clambered up beside her brother. Stealing one of his pillows she laid down on top of the covers and turned her attention to him. Once certain she’d finished settling Aidan picked the book back up and began reading. Darcy was a good reader but she wasn’t so good at reading out loud like Aidan. He did all the voices and didn’t stumble over words the way she sometimes did. “Do you think there’s something wrong with us?” she asked while he turned the page.

He put a finger in the book and looked at her. He looked kind of sad and Darcy wished she hadn’t asked. He sighed. “I don’t think there’s something wrong with us Darcy,” He said, voice a little tentative. “I think there’s something right with us.”

Darcy bit her lip. The muffled sounds of the downstairs TV just audible in the quiet. There was an unpleasant feeling in the room now- an uncertainty that was uncomfortable. She really wished she hadn’t brought it up. “Sure.” She said just to fill the emptiness. Aidan picked up the book again. She'd dozed off not long after to the sounds of Aiden imitating the high pitched scolding of one Hermione Granger.

Thankfully it was dad who woke them in the morning otherwise Mom would have been mad to find Darcy asleep with Aidan, his reading lamp having been left on all night when he fell asleep reading and his clothes still all over the floor.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I want to thank everyone so much for their kind comments. I really appreciate it. More background here, I tried to make up for it by including some of Clint's POV. One more chapter after this and things really hit the fan.


	4. Chapter 3

There was something fundamentally different about watching horrifying events unfold from afar rather than being in the middle of them. A completely different kind of terror. The fear and adrenaline were all familiar from Puente Antiguo but there was a unique sort of helplessness watching things go to shit thousands of miles away on a tiny hotel television screen. At least in New Mexico she’d been able to do stuff- even if it was only running around desperately trying not to get blown up and rescuing as many animals as she could.

She and Jane watched together as the news stations tried frantically to keep the footage rolling. There was a lot of really shaky cell phone footage. For obvious reasons helicopters aren’t being allowed in the area. Giant flying armored elephant whales. Holy crap. Just- _what the fuck?_

“There’s your boyfriend.” Darcy said without thinking the first time they caught a glimpse of a fluttering cape. She was really not good with words. Jane clutched at her hand so hard it hurt but Darcy didn’t pull away. No one really knew what was happening. Well, except for the Aliens part. Everyone had pretty much got that.

But if a portal had open over New York did that mean more are about to open over other cities? Why were the Aliens attacking? Was that Captain America? What the fuck, what the fuck, _what the fuck_? The speculation was rampant. Footage cut off eventually and the news stations began the endless cycles of rerunning footage until they had something new to show. Both she and Jane pull out their phones in unison. Jane tried to call Erik again. It went to voicemail for the 6th time. Darcy scrolled through her twitter feed. She had over two hundred notifications pending on Facebook which she ignored for the moment- she’d posted earlier that she was safe and out of the U.S.

Just- holy fucking shit.

They sat there unmoving, glued to the TV and their phones.

A shot of the portal flashed on screen again. A giant beam and a gash in the fabric of the sky. Jane squeezed her hand again expression caught between horror and fascination despite herself. “We should be trying to get data from this.” Jane said softly, the first thing either of them had said in ages. Neither of them moved anyway.

It seemed to go on forever.

Then, the portal was closed they hear. The President comes on to confirm it. And it was over. Just like that. Neither of them moved from the couch.

By well past two in the morning they both had huge bags under their eyes. Probably over the weight limit. It was unspoken understanding at this point that neither of them would be working tomorrow. Before them the screen flickered and looped again. They had been watching the same patched together footage of New York for the last few hours. It couldn’t be more than 45 minutes total that had survived the city to the outside world. There was a glimpse of red and lightning in a wobbly shot from some street. A vertical video from a bank manager crouched low to the floor pointing through a glass window as a pack of aliens stormed past with laser guns. Grainy footage from an older phone capturing what looked to be Captain America slamming his shield into one of the things faces. A shot of Iron Man _falling from the sky_. Jesus.

Jane was clinging to her phone, waiting for it to ring but nothing had come in yet and as the hours passed she was moving beyond fear and well into anger. She had taken to throwing a pillow at the screen every time they saw that flash of Thor’s cape. Erik still hadn’t called them back either.

“You could date Captain America.” Darcy suggested, “He’s big and blonde and muscly.”

Jane’s chin wobbled and a few angry tears leaked out. She wiped them away with a rough hand snorting at Darcy’s recommendation. “Captain America is in love with James Barns. Everyone knows that Darcy.”

“Fair.” She sighed. Anyone who had taken American History in high school could tell you they were gay for each other. Or had been. And anyway the last thing Jane needed when she was trying to rebound was to be someone else’s rebound.

The person holding the camera let out a now familiar scream and ducked falling debris just like they had the last six times they had seen this clip. The picture dissolved into blurs and streaks until it cleared to zoom in on a woman and another man helping to evacuate an overturned bus. Really was amazing what people would just stop and film while their lives were in danger. “Oh! And there’s another blonde one!” Darcy pointed at the screen, “This getting a little weird. Why are they all blonde men?”

“Tony Stark has brown hair.” Jane pointed out.

Darcy nodded, “That’s true. Good. I was getting worried we were getting some Aryan shit or something.” Darcy squinted at the shaky footage and frowned. The new blonde dude looked kind of familiar. He had what Darcy thought was a fricken _quiver_ across his back like this was fricken Robin Hood. She watched as he gently herded a terrified rescued dude behind him and drew an arrow on an intense looking black bow. Darcy didn’t know too much about bows but the shape told her it was some kind of fancy recurve bow and probably had a hell of a draw weight. The arrow loosed with barely a pause. Something exploded. The woman beside him continued emptying the bus of injured people, trusting the other guy to watch her back.

Another arrow loosed, again without more than a second’s pause, the arrow flying dead straight into one of the alien things eyes. The grainy footage zoomed in on the man’s blonde hair and face. Darcy blinked. “Wait- isn’t that one of the illuminati?” Jane looked over at her in concern. “No, I’m serious! That’s one of those illuminati shit heads from New Mexico!” Darcy pointed accusingly at the TV.

Jane blinked and peered back at the screen. “Huh, really?”

“Yes! I caught him trying to sneak around and follow me!” Darcy crossed her arms in a pout. As they watched the man drew another arrow and loosed, drawing another before the first had even left his bow. Again and again and again. Jesus that was some _crazy shit_. Still what kind of idiot fought with a fucking bow and arrow? The footage flickered and switched to a different clip. “You could date him. He was pretty cute. Not quite as buff and working for a cult is a bit of a bummer but his arms were huge.”

Jane rolled her eyes fighting a smile then yawned loudly. “I’m not dating a different superhero,” She grumbled slouching over against the couches’ arm rest, “I’m just going to murder Thor.”

“Could date the woman there. She was hot.” Darcy pulled one of the blankets up further to wrap around her chilly shoulders.

“Go to sleep Darcy.” Jane mumbled into the couch.

Darcy yawned. The things really were contagious. “You’re right, you’re too good to be dating fucking thieving illuminati shithead goons. Fuck’em.” Jane didn’t answer so Darcy took that as agreement. Jesus her eyes were burning for sleep.

They woke in the morning, late afternoon really, to a world still reeling.

Everything was on fucking lockdown. No flights, no buses, nothing. The vast majority of stores stay closed. There was an anxiousness in the air with the knowledge that fucking portals could open above your head at any moment and rain death down upon you. Oh and now the rest of the world was in on the fact that fucking aliens exist.

Darcy was too far away to really do anything helpful for New York but she went and donated blood the next day anyway. She was –O, universal donor. Then she did some math and scraped together thirty five dollars to donate to the relief foundations that were blasting their alarm bells for donations. It wasn’t a lot but it was all she could squeeze out of this month’s pay and still handle her student loans.

+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=

(Darcy- Age 4)

There was a day in winter that Aidan, mom, and her went shopping together. Darcy wore her sparkly winter boots and enjoyed stomping in the melting slush of last week’s snow storm. Mom dragged them around from store to store. They all held hands walking through the busy parking lots. Mom even took them to McDonalds for lunch which Darcy liked because they had chicken nuggets. “You don’t want to try something else this time?” mom asked, “How about a hamburger?” Darcy shook her head. Why would she want something else when she knows she likes chicken nuggets? Mom sighed but Darcy got her nuggets.

Darcy didn’t really know what mom was doing or what she was buying but it was fun to look at all the stuff in the stores. There were lots of pretty lights up and fun music playing. It made Darcy want to dance but mom said she shouldn’t do that because she might break something.

The next store they went into had a whole bunch of candles. Darcy let go of her mom’s hand and went over to the display to sniff them. She liked that- separating the good ones from the gross ones. Made her nose tingle. Darcy had just decided that although she liked real pancakes, pancake candle was one of the _worst_ when she heard Aidan yelling. Darcy peeked around the shelf.

Aidan was upset- he had something pressed to his chest and was glowering at mom. Mom was trying to pry it away from him. “Aidan, I already said no! What would you even want with this?!” She hissed in frustration.

“Would you just _listen_? We _need_ it! I _know_!” Aidan insisted angrily with reddening checks. 

“Enough.” Mom grabbed the thing roughly and put it back on a high shelf. Aidan looked real mad. Mom grabbed his arm and started to pull him toward the exit. “Darcy, come here!” She shouted.

Darcy ran to catch up and took hold of moms other hand. Mom put them both back in the car, slammed the door shut, and headed back into the shop. Darcy frowned- she hadn’t finished with the candles. Aidan sat in the empty spot beside her booster seat. He still looked real mad. He kicked the back of the front seat angrily. It left a foot print. Mom hated that.

“What did you wanna get?” Darcy asked curiously.

Aidan scowled out the window at the store. “Something we need.” He scoffed, “She just doesn’t get it.”

A week later on a trip to see Christmas lights at the zoo they get stuck on the side of the road. Darcy didn’t like it. It was scary. They sit there forever and it got colder and dark and they had missed the lights and Darcy wondered if they are going to be stuck there until they _died_. Aidan unbuckled her booster and let her sit on his lap while they waited. He turned on the little overhead light so it wasn’t so dark. Mom and Dad argued in the front seat while they called people on their cell phones. Aidan looked mad enough to scream.

Aidan stopped _asking_ after that- he started _doing_. He’d get up in the middle of the night and walk out the front door because he needed to. He’d give things away. Knock things over. Steal things sometimes too. Mom and Dad fought about it. Mom said it was because dad was too soft. Dad didn’t argue that- just said mom needed to be more understanding. He talked to Aidan. Darcy could hear from the top of the stairs.

Darcy doesn’t really understand.

Mom gave her a box of cupcakes to hold one day though. They were for a New Year’s party at the house and mom said Darcy could keep them safe while they finished up grocery shopping. She means to, she really does. Darcy watched them all the way through check out and grabbed them before the boy could put them in the bag sideways and ruin them. They were the mini kind, half chocolate and half vanilla. Little sparkly sprinkles on top. Darcy wanted to eat one but she didn’t because she meant to keep them safe.

But there was a bench outside the grocery store that she knew they belong on. Someone needed them there. So she put them down and walked to the car where mom was putting the groceries in the back. Mom was really mad when they got home and she found out Darcy had left them. Darcy tried to explain- the bench needed them. That made mom madder. She yelled at Darcy for leaving the cupcakes, she yelled at Aiden for being a bad influence, she yelled at Dad for not putting a stop to it.

Darcy ends up in her room for the night without dinner.

She sniffled on her bed listening to the laughter and music from downstairs. Aiden came in with a little plate of treats. He jumped up on her bed cheerfully even though it was even smaller than his big bed. He looked happy. “Mom said you left the cupcakes on a bench?” He asked with a smile. Darcy nodded. He grinned even wider. “Cuz you needed to, right?”

“Yeah.” She whispered. She munched on the tiny brownie he had brought her. It was gooey and didn’t have any chocolate chips which was the way she liked them.

“You’re like me!” He half whispered back, a big smile still on his face.

“Cha’mean?” She asked.

Aidan flopped back on the bed, cushioned his head on a fist. “We’ve got like, super powers or something Darc’!”

Darcy considered this. The idea pleased her but, “Mom was angry though.”

“Yeah. She doesn’t get it. I don’t think she has any powers. Maybe she’s jealous or something.”

Darcy deliberated. It sort of made sense. People did mean things when they were jealous Darcy knew. Just a week ago Holly had pushed Darcy on the playground when Darcy had shown off her new sparkle Christmas bow. They’d gotten in a big fight that had ended in them both having to talk to the principal and Holly had gotten a telling off that had Darcy smirking. Still, “What would our super power be?”

“We, like, know stuff that needs to happen! Put stuff in motion!” He exclaimed excitedly.

“We push things?” She asked in confusion. That didn’t really seem like a super power. Anyone could push things. People like Holly who were _totally_ not superhero material.

Aidan shook his head. “No, like, _metaphorically_! We guide the way!”

It sounded an awful lot like pushing things to Darcy. And she didn’t really know what _metaphorical_ meant but she wasn’t about to ask.

Aidan huffed at her. “We like, make it possible for other people to do the important stuff. The guides on the path of life!” He said in the same kind of voice he used when reading to her– with the funny emphasis and seriousness. She frowned. She didn’t really understand what that was supposed to mean. Aidan waved his hands around enthusiastically, “Like a candle in the dark!” He frowned for a moment thinking, “We’re like the Lamp lighters in a Christmas Carol! Remember them from the movie?”

Darcy did remember. They had watched it together just before Christmas and Darcy had asked why there were candles outside. Mom put candles on the kitchen table sometimes, or on cakes, but never outside! Except for Halloween… Aiden told her it was because the story took place before electricity and to see at night people had put candles outside. Back then some people’s jobs had been to go out and light all the candles before it got too dark so people could see. Darcy had thought at the time that it sounded like great fun. Still, “We’re _candle holders_?” she asked puzzled. At Aidan’s excited nod she shrugged. It would be a cool power she guessed but, “I’d rather fly.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you all so much for al your Kudo's and comments.I really, really appreciate it. I love to hear all of your reactions and thoughts. I hope you all enjoyed this chapter too, it's the last one before things really go off the rails.


	5. Chapter 4

(Darcy- Age 12)

Mom wanted to put locks on the outside of Aidan’s door. Darcy sat on the top most stair of the landing in her purple pajamas, listening to the screaming match taking place below. Dad was trying to mediate but Aidan had started cursing and Mom raised her voice to meet his yelling and the battle had commenced. Darcy let the words wash over and through her. 

“You’re not even fucking _trying_ to see it from my perspective! I’m so tired of this fucking bullshit!”

“Aidan, please stop swearing. If we could all just calm dow-”

“She wants to lock me in my fucking room! Fuck you. Fuck you both!”

“If you didn’t keep sneaking out in the middle of the night to do god knows wha-“

Aidan storms up the stairs and past her without a glance, slams the door to his room with a shuddering bang that shakes the house. He opens the door and slams it again and then one final time. Her parents keep up the arguing just fine without him. Darcy looked to her brothers closed door. She’s certain it’s locked. Standing up she walked to her own bedroom and closed the door softly. She lay in bed staring at the ceiling.

Sometimes, just sometimes, she kind of agrees with mom. Aidan leaves at all hours. He does crazy things- push people on busy sidewalks. Take a hundred dollars from their mom’s purse and give it to some homeless guy. Leave a gold necklace inside a random mailbox. Haunt the halls of the school after hours. Break into office buildings and stand outside random doors (sometimes for hours on end.) It’s…kind of scary. To see him so off the rails. Like he’s not even trying to manage it at all. And the arguing never shuts up at home- if he just acted normal for one day, one day-

Darcy took a deep breath. Let it fill up her diaphragm, drawing in air through her nose. Hold. Out slowly through her mouth.

She knows that’s not fair.

Not fair of her to think that way. She knows how it feels for her. The sudden _knowing_. That something _needs_ to be put somewhere, that she _needs_ to go stand somewhere, that somethings just _have_ to happen. She is required to be there or do something for them to take place. That she needs to go flick that first domino to put it all in motion.

Both have them have known since they were little that Aidan’s _callings_ were always more important than hers. That the things he puts in motion are more significant. He probably can’t ignore it in the middle of the night the way that she does. Can’t just take a few deep breaths and promise to take care of it tomorrow. Hers are always little things. Not the crazy stuff like Aidan does. Put a quarter on a library shelf. Wait one more time for the light to turn green before crossing the street. Take the last pen from the front desk at school. The craziest thing she had ever done was throw a stolen ball from gym down a hallway and then run like crazy when it hit some dude in the face.

It’s quiet now.

Even the TV is off downstairs.

Darcy gets out of bed and grabs the small flashlight from her bedside. Her bare feet stick slightly to the wood floor as she descended the staircase. The little flashlight casts a soft glow so she doesn’t fall down the steep steps in the dark. She heads into the kitchen. Aidan is sitting at the counter on one of the barstools. He’s in his big black hoodie and ripped jeans and he’d be almost invisible if it weren’t for his pale skin. He had gotten really thin lately. His right hand has dried scabs on it- he’s been teaching himself to skateboard but he’s not really that good at it yet. A bowl of cereal was perched in front of him and he dragged a spoon lazily through the milk.

Darcy placed the flashlight, still on, in the center of the island. It’s pale glow casting shadows on the walls.

The big red mug was just where she’d put it after emptying the dish washer so she took that one, filled it half way with milk and crept quietly to the microwave. This is the tricky part. It opened quietly enough. Darcy closed the door as slowly as she could. It still made a soft click sound that seems unreasonably loud in the dark. Set for a minute and thirty seconds she watched the cup spin, hand on the handle as the numbers counted down. She pulled the handle open as carefully as she could, just before the 0 count that would start the beeping. Microwaves should have a nighttime mode or something. Jesus. She scooped out some coco powered and dumped that in and filled the rest of the mug with cool water. Gave it a stir with a big spoon.

Aidan took a bite of his cereal, gazing out the window.

It was pretty dark out. _Must be no moon_, Darcy though. She sipped her coco. Felt it burn the hairs on her tongue. Took another sip.

“She’s such fucking bullshit.” Aidan mutters furiously.

He looked really tired, she thought. Almost on the verge of sickly. “Yeah.” Darcy agreed noncommittally. She’s bullshit, she loves you, I love you, please be careful.

Aidan looks at her. Sizing up her agreement. He sighed through his nose. Aidan closed his eyes, kneading at his brow. His hair is sticking up at funny angles like he’s been running fingers through it or pulling at it. He stares at his empty bowl as Darcy takes another sip. His eyes flicker back to her. Face a bit softer now.

_Don’t_, she thinks, _don’t say whatever you’re about to_.

He gives her a tired smile. Like he knows what she’s thinking. He might. “I love you, Darce.”

“Yeah.” She muttered into her cup. She has a weird feeling in her stomach. Darcy put her empty mug in the dishwasher.

Aidan reached over and ruffled her hair. “Go to bed you little idiot.”

She pulled away in annoyance. Ugh. Jesus. “Yeah, whatever. Why don’t you?” Darcy headed back to the stairs, little flashlight still sitting on the counter for Aidan. He was refilling his cereal bowl. What a loser. Carefully placing her foot on the bottom step she made her way back to bed.

+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=

It’s been a long time since Clint last felt like this.

He’d been uncover with a Russian mafia trying to figure out their source when it all goes to shit. Suddenly he’s been made and he doesn’t know how. Annoying. It had been going pretty well too, he was sure he had finally gotten close to the top and now it was all useless. Four months of work in the trash. And _surprise_ mafia guys don’t take well to being tricked. Clint gets out, makes for the extraction point but his handler isn’t responding. He misses Coulson fiercely. But this had happened before even if it was shitty. Sometimes you just get stuck with crap handlers and you have to handle shit yourself.

He gets on a plane and makes for the closest safe house he can think of- it’s one of Natasha’s in Chicago. So it’s all fine. He doesn’t start to actually panic until he gets there and finds a bunch of S.H.E.I.L.D. agents already inside. Who then proceed to _shoot_ at him. He had to make a rather hasty exit out a window. His nose was definitely broken (again.) and it was gushing hot blood down his face. Clint tried Natasha’s emergency number at a payphone halfway across the city. The number’s been disconnected so he tried the other three. All disconnected.

“Damn it Tasha.”

He had no idea what was happening or where his partner was or why S.H.E.I.L.D. seemed to be trying to kill him now.

He had nothing with him but his Sig., a small box of additional ammo, his backup hearing aids, and a half eaten nutrition bar. It wasn’t like he carried credit cards and stuff while on mission and he had used up the last of his cash getting to Chicago. He could pick a couple pockets but lots of people didn’t keep cash on them anymore and he didn’t want to risk using a stolen credit cards unless he really had to. They were too easy to trace. He could steal a car but he didn’t know where he could go if even Natasha’s safe houses were compromised and he was hesitant to draw any attention when he didn’t know what was happening. 

His head was still ringing from the elbow he took to the face earlier.

Clint headed for the rooftops then down into the alleys. Whatever was going on he wanted to be sure he didn’t have a tail. He needed sleep. He could feel the ache deep in his muscles. Much longer and he was going to be in danger of making stupid mistakes. He hasn’t slept in 48 hours. Ugh.

+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=

Look, Darcy loved Jane.

She really did.

But a girl needed a break every now and then and after all the London crazy- running around a foreign city while portals to other dimensions kept pop in out of nowhere and the universes slowly mushed together in some kind of mosh pit that threatened the fabric of reality and then having to deal with evil space elves of Morgoth- she just needed a break.

And as a bona fide assistant, rather than unpaid intern, Darcy actually had days she could take off. So she talked with Jane and they agreed upon a week off next month while Jane was busy guest lecturing at Harvard. It wasn’t like Darcy would have had a whole lot to do then anyway. It was going to be great. She was thinking maybe Hawaii, or Disney Land, or a cruise. Maybe just a week at a hotel with some spa treatments. She gathered up pamphlets and travel packages, bookmarked pages for the best deals and all she had to do was decide. Darcy deliberated her options with great care. She didn’t often spend money like this.

In the end Darcy booked a short 4 day cruise out of Boston. It would go up to Cape Cod and Canada then right back to Boston. Not really the most exciting of destinations but it was relatively cheap and cruises were all inclusive. Plus Darcy had heard that the boat could be almost more fun than the destinations anyway so she was pretty happy with her choice. She’d get into Boston and have two days to chill beforehand, cruise around, then hop on flight and be back for Monday. It was perfect.

A week and a half before her trip Darcy woke in the middle of the night. Her clock illuminated the time in a red light: 1:28 AM. Her head was _killing_ her. She had literally never had a headache this bad before. God. Nausea rolled through her violently. She scrambled off the bed on shaky limbs and barely made it to the toilet in time. Vomit caught on a few strands of her long hair. She shivered in disgust. Trying to turn the lights on made everything worse and she wondered if this was a migraine. Jesus. It had to be. She turned on the faucet in the dark to wash the tips of her hair (Ew.) and realized her nose was bleeding. Like _really_ bleeding. Her heart was pounding loudly in her chest. She panted, clutching the counter top. Jesus. She needed. She needed her laptop.

Darcy seized the wash cloth off the towel hook and dampened it. She stuck it around her burning neck and pulled several tissue from their box to hold to her nose. She stumbled back towards her bed. She needed to do something with her laptop. Now. Yes.

The light was blinding when she opened the cover.

She wanted to cry. Her head throbbed in pain.

She wasn’t even sure what her fingers were typing.

The cruise. She was on the cruise site, curser blinking over the little ‘login’ button. Darcy entered her information with shaking fingers, one hand still clamping tissues to her nose. She canceled her ticket. She’d get a 60% refund for the late cancellation.

At the search bar she typed random things- Boston? No. Seattle? No. Charlotte? No. Boston? No. Miami? No. Huston? No. London?! No. Boston. NO. Ok fine. Jesus. Chicago? ….?

There was a one way flight to Chicago scheduled to leave at approximately the same time as her flight to Boston would have. She booked it. The relief was instantaneous, pain draining away from her head. Darcy collapsed back onto the bed. Jesus. It had never been like that before. She clutched the damp wash cloth and brought it around her neck to rest on her forehead. Fucking shit. _Was that what it had been like for Aidan_? She wondered almost delirious.

In the morning she booked a hotel she could stay at in Chicago and tried to ignore the resentment bubbling in her chest. She talked to Jane, sort of, and told her the cruise had been cancelled so she had decided to visit Chicago instead.

Jane blinked in surprise at her, “Chicago?”

“Yeah.” Darcy shrugged as casually as she could.

The flight to Chicago was smooth. No screaming babies or anything which was nice. The flight to London with Jane had been a nightmare (which really set the tone for the entire time they had spent there come to think of it.) God- screaming triplets for over 6 hours.

The hotel was nice too, not luxurious or anything, but clean and pleasant. And it had a pool so that was a bonus she was excited about. She checked in and headed up to her room then changed and headed directly for that heated pool. She swam some laps, trying to drain the tension out of her. Her arms burned after just a few laps but her head was still a buzz so she wasn’t really all that successful. A quick shower and a bite to eat at the hotel buffet and she was back in her room. Her foot bounced. She stood up, grabbed her key card, purse, phone, and taser. Then she drove in endless loops around the city in her rental while it grew steadily darker out.

Darcy parked under a fluttering street lamp and got out of the car.

Before her lay an alley.

One she knew she needed to go down.

Darcy stared down into the black void that was the alley before her. She could feel herself shake her head in self-disgust because she must have really lost her mind. Of all the stupid ass things she has ever done, _this_, this would take the cake. Take the cake home right to a bakery full of other cakes. The fact that she was even _considering_ -.

It was like, really _pitch_ black. God.

Darcy held her phone up in one hand, the screen’s glow making barely a dent in the blackness. She squinted behind her glasses but it was useless, she couldn’t see anything. It smelled like rotting trash though. Ugh. What was wrong with her? This was like, cliché dumb blonde in a horror movie kind of crap. Her other hand grasped the taser in her pocket so tightly it shook.

It was one thing to find yourself in danger, then you only have to react however panicked or frenzied that reaction was, It was quite another thing to deliberately step into a situation that was almost guaranteed to put you in danger. Darcy didn’t want to go in there. It was such a majorly bad idea. It _stunk_, it was so dark. God. Her heart was hammering. She clicked the little button of the side of her phone again to keep the screen glowing. The smell was seriously making her want to vomit.

She took a shaky step forward. Then another. The glow of her screen hit the edge of a dumpster. That would explain the awful smell.

The light faded slightly. Darcy clicked the button again and it returned in full force.

Trying to breathe through her mouth she took another step into the dark.

The light hit a boot and Darcy was _really_ hoping she wasn’t not about to find a dead body back here.

Stepping around the dumpster she found a man slouched on the filthy ground. For a second she was certain she really had found a dead body. Which would be just her fucking luck- cancel her lovely cruise and travel to Chicago to find a dead body behind a dumpster. Jesus. But he moved then, raising a bruised arm to cover his eyes. “Aww, light…” The guy muttered unhappily.

Darcy shifted uncertainly.

Something knocked aside the hand holding her phone and suddenly the man was standing. _What_? Adrenaline rushed through her. Jesus. An iron grip grasped her other hand and twisted. Her face was squished up against the opposite alley wall. One large hand pushed on her head, holding tight. Another callused hand forced her arm behind her back in a painfully tight grip. Holy crap. Her free hand moved to grab for her taser and he pushed her head harder against the wall. She froze. Oh god. Oh god. A harsh deep voice snapped at her, “Who are you? Who sent you?” and her brain kind of stalled out. Darcy had been expecting something more along the lines of ‘give me all your cash’ or whatever. The pressure on her head increased and she could feel his breath in her ear when he repeated himself tersely, “Who. Are. You?”

The pain brought words back to her, “Ow, Ow, ow, Darcy! Oh my god, ow, you fuckwit!”

The pressure eased slightly and there was silence for half a second. “Lewis?”

What? How? Random alley dude knows her nam-? – ow. “Yes! Jesus.”

“Who sent you? How did you find me?” The grip tightened once in warning then loosened to a softer hold. Darcy didn’t dare move.

“Dude, I have no idea who the fuck you are! I was just- I thought I heard someone down here, that’s all! How the fuck do you know who _I_ am?” The hands fell away from her and Darcy twisted around nearly falling over in her rush. It was pitch black without the light from her phone and she could barely see the outline of a head before her, it tilted slightly and she knew he was staring at her too.

“Huh” He said, “That’s a weird coinky-dink.”

Jesus fuck.

“Illuminati dude?” Darcy squinted in the darkness. Her wrist was still burning.

He seemed to slump a little. “It’s Hawkeye.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I want to thank everyone so much for all their kudos and kind words. It really means a lot. I hope you enjoyed this chapter- now the fun really starts.


	6. Chapter 5

Hawkeye. Right. What the fuck? Why was he in an alley in Chicago by a dumpster? She didn’t get a chance to do more than blink in stunned silence before she was falling. He’d pushed her. _Again_. Clearly he had gone crazy. Darcy tried to scramble backward away from him when a loud sound _cracked_ through the air and left her ears ringing.

Gun shots?

Another shot rang out _just_ missing them as the guy pulled Darcy down and around the other edge of the dumpster. She had just enough brain power to spare half a though about how gross it was to be squatting there.

“Sniper” Illuminati Asshole Hawkeye sighed in tired annoyance.

She wanted to laugh but she didn’t because she was concentrating on not peeing her pants. _Oh my god_, she watched as the guy stuck his head out over the top of their cover. He ducked down quickly and there was another loud _ping_ as a bullet scrapped the dumpster. _What the shit was happening_? “I- I have a car parked. Just outside the alley.” Darcy told him.

He glanced at her, a handgun clenched in his right hand. Where had he gotten that from? Jesus. She pulled out the keys from her back pocket with clumsy fingers. “That’ll work,” He shrugged. “We need to move before he changes positions or decides to come down here.”

“Yeah. Right. Ok.”

He took hold of her wrist again. Holy crap his hands were big. She could feel rough calluses rub against her skin. He dragged her from their precious cover, forcing her to keep low. It was incredibly difficult Darcy discovered to try and sprint at a crouch. There was a bang next to her ear. Illuminati dude was shooting back. Holy crap. Darcy ran to the car, yanked the heavy driver’s door open, jumping inside, and slammed the door. She could hear another bang as she fumbled, forcing the key into the ignition. The passenger slid door open and slammed close. “Drive now please.”

Yes, yes. Darcy pulled off the curb, tires squealing at the sharp turn. Jesus she was shaking. “Was that for you or for me?” She asked in a daze.

He was rolling down the window, sticking his head out like a dog. The night wind rippled his hair. He popped his head back in briefly to look at her and say, “Make a turn when you can. We have a tail.”

“Oh shit.” She swore.

Crazy dude leaned out the window again. Darcy took a sharp left. Someone honked viciously at her. Sorry. Sorry. God. Something hit the car. Tire? The car swerved and Darcy struggled with the wheel to correct it.

“Faster if you can.”

Right. Jesus. She stepped down harder on the exhilarator. She took another turn, then another, and another. She could hear screeching from their back tire.

She turned again.

“Pull over.”

She did, her whole body shaking. Then he was around the car opening the driver side door. Firm hands pulled her from the car. He grabbed hold of her wrist _again_ then paused seeming slightly uncertain. From behind the fog of panic there was a knowing. Darcy pulled him to the left (even though his fingers were still wrapped around her wrist.) She pulled and after the slightest resistance his feet gave. He followed. Darcy went up a block, leaving the slightly smoking rental car behind. The air smelt like burnt rubber. Took a left, up some stairs, another left, a right. There was a storm door. Old and forgotten. Darcy pulled on the rusted handle and it creaked open to reveal a pitch blackness to rival the void that had existed in the alley. You could barely make out a set of very old wooden stairs descending into the darkness. She pulled his wrist but this time his feet stuck. Darcy turned back to face him. They needed to move. They needed to move now. “Come on-”

“Where are you leading me?” He sounded far away and cold.

They needed to _leave_ now.

“Look just- we need to move! Please!”

The hand on her wrist tightened and he thrust her forward. She went, leading the way down the start of the stairs. With his hand still holding the gun he managed to pull the metal door closed behind them and bathe them both in solid black. They both stood still for a moment. Darcy started to walk again, descending down the steps slowly. The hand on her wrist was even tighter than before. It really hurt.

At the bottom you could feel the passage open up. The space bigger and air reverberating differently. They were underground in some sort of tunnel. The lingering coolness from the night air quickly replaced by a dry, hot, stale air. It was incredibly musty.

On instinct Darcy leaned down and ran her hand blindly along the floor until her fingers found something metal. It was a flashlight. One of those big old bulky metal ones. She tried hard not to think about why it was there or what had happened to its owner. The glass was cracked on the front but it seemed to be holding together for now. A button on the handle clicked and the light of the bulb filled the tunnel with a yellow light, dust eerily drifting across the beam. They walked in silence for a while. The stale air was uncomfortable to breath. Eyes bore into her from behind but she kept her feet moving until the queasiness in her stomach subsided.

She turned nervously to face the man behind her.

The dude had his gun resting comfortable in the curl of his fingers. He wasn’t pointing it at her, not yet. But the look he was giving her gave the impression he was about a breath away from that. “You want to tell me what’s going on here?” His eyes were scary. Sharp and vast. A cold steel gray. She’s never seen eyes like his before.

“Look, it was an accident I ran into you. I was walking by and –“

“Bullshit.” His finger shifted slightly on the grip of the handgun. Jesus. Her heart, which had only just begun to slow, picked up again. “How did you find me?” Darcy’s mind went blank. He took a step forward, eyes drilling into her. “The batteries, find me in that alley, just happening to find a convenient flashlight in the dark. That’s an awful lot of weird coincidences. My own men are shooting at me and that puts me in a rather suspicious mood.”

“Wha- I-”

He took another step.

He was right in front of her face now. Personal bubble officially popped. Jesus. He didn’t blink. “Why don’t you explain this to me then?” _And you better have a good explanation_, Darcy heard loud and clear in the calm cold of his voice.

“Look it’s, it’s difficult to explain. I’m not, like, out to get you! I have no idea why people are shooting at us!” She could feel her face flushing in anger.

“You. They were shooting at me and then they were shooting at you. And I’m ganna need a little bit more than that.”

“It’s going to sound crazy!” She nearly screamed in exasperation and threw up her arms.

His cold eyes remained unchanged. Another step brought him even closer, “I’m an Avenger. I fought aliens invading New York with a bow and arrow. Try me.”

A shuddering breath ripped through her chest. Darcy had never really needed explained it to anyone before. Aidan had always known obviously. For years he had tried to explain it to their parents so Darcy had never needed to, not that mom or dad had ever really understood what he was talking about. She had never told anyone else. She didn’t know how to. The words felt far away, ringing in her head but unable to find her mouth.

The man before her tilted his head a little to the left and his eyes lost just a little of their intensity. He put one of his heavy hands on her shoulder, pushing gently downward and leading her to sit collapsed on the ground. He crouched down to maintain eye contact, the gun suddenly gone. “I just- It’s just-” She took another breath under his watchful eye. Jesus. Get a fricken grip. Ok? Ok. “It’s just this thing I can do. I just sometimes know that I need to do something, go somewhere.” She took another deep breath and promised with all the intensity she could muster, “I swear it has nothing to do with- I have no idea why people are shooting at you – me –us.”

His eyes searched her face closely for any signs of deceit for several long moments. With a soft sigh, finally pulling his eyes from her face, Hawkeye bent his head low towards the dusty floor.

They both breathed in the musty hot air for a moment.

Then his eyes raised to consider her again. “Yeah, ok.” He nodded a little as if to himself. Darcy didn’t think he believed her but he at least he had seemed to have decided that she wasn’t some kind of evil spy or whatever. Jesus.

He plopped back suddenly onto his butt, a small cloud of dirt and dust swirling up into the stale air with the movement. His feet sprawled out carelessly like an overgrown toddler. He scratched at his head and yawned. He looked a little like Aidan that one time she went to his room to rouse him and he’d woken still stoned out of his mind from a party. Darcy felt kind of dizzy. She leaned back, hit the edge of the tunnel, and slumped against it. She pulled her feet away from crazy dude. Her heart was still pounding. She took deliberately deep breathes despite the stale air and dust coating the back of her throat.

“Should we, should we move?” Darcy asked, not moving. Her legs were ringing. Like that feeling when your ears ring but it was stretching all the way down her legs and through her toes. The pounding of her blood hitting the tips of her toes. She felt kind of like Jell-O.

“I think we’re probably good for the moment.” He shrugged. Darcy was not particularly reassured by that. He yawned again, “We’ll stay here for a moment. Catch your breath…I still need to figure out what’s going on.”

“Well my phone is probably smashed to pieces back in that alley so-”

“Oh yeah, sorry about that.” He said casually like an asshole.

She was quiet for a moment. Dude was crazy but also he was an Avenger and Thor was always singing their praise. But then, Thor was still all befuddled over Loki like the guy was just having a temper tantrum or something so maybe he wasn’t the best judge of character. She had seen the footage from New York. ‘Hawkeye’ they called him, a fricken archer. What a weirdo. He’d held his own in the alley though. Saved her life probably. But then, she wouldn’t have even been there if it hadn’t been for him.

Darcy shook her head, trying to focus her spiraling thoughts. “I have my laptop back at my hotel.” She offered cautiously. She was not super stoked about having him following her ‘home’ or anything but if people were shooting at her like he said they were, it was probably best to keep a good meat shield nearby.

“That’ll work.”

Despite the agreement neither of them moved for a long while.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the late upload guys. It was kind of a crappy week and I took Saturday to rest myself. I want to thank everyone so much for all your kind comments on the last chapter. I really do appreciate it and I'll try to be better about responding this week.


	7. Chapter 6

Eventually Super-Agent Jackass stood back up and walked over to her to offer a hand. She was almost inclined to reject it. But she was really sore. Yay lactic acid. Darcy was not built for this kind of continuous activity. So she took the offered hand and put the bare minimum effort into pulling herself up, let him do most of the work. Upright her feet immediately started to hurt again. Which was just, awesome. Great. “I have no idea how to get out of here.” Darcy admitted.

Hawkeye didn’t seem bothered by the news. He pointed a finger in the darkness in a direction that looked just the same as everything else. “It’s that way. You can lead.” Oh yeah? Great idea. Have the person who didn’t know where they were going lead. Whatever. Darcy started moving in the direction he had pointed. He grabbed her wrist again. Darcy was too tired to argue. At least the hold was softer this time.

It didn’t take too long to get back to the exit at least and they climb up the stairs back up to the storm door and out into the street. It was dark out now but the waxing moon was providing fairly good light. The air was crisp and biting fresh. Hawkeye only released her wrist once he was back above ground. She wondered if he was claustrophobic or something.

“Which hotel are you staying at?” He asked.

Darcy gave the address and Hawkeye set off. She blinked tiredly. Wondered how he could possibly still know where they were in relation to anything else. Maybe he lived in Chicago. Grew up on its streets and knew every road. It didn’t really matter she supposed but she was grateful because she hadn’t even stopped to wonder how she was going to find her way back without her phone’s GPS. Her feet were pounding. She was so tired. Ahead of her Hawkeye kept scanning the sidewalks and windows.

A drunk couple stumbled past them, laughing and clinging to each other.

They walk past a restaurant, young people all seated outside on little tables with candles. The smell of food wafted by as they passed.

A horn went off somewhere making Darcy jerk slightly.

Cars buzzed pass them without a care.

They walked for a long time. They walked forever. They walked until the pain in Darcy’s feet went numb.

She barely noticed when they arrived at the hotel. Didn’t give a thought to how weird they must look to the concierge, covered in dirt, smelling like trash and sweat.

The elevator ride to her room was awkward. Hawkeye was just as intimidating in the eerie florescent lights as he had been in the dark of the alley. He wasn’t particularly tall, but definitely built and his arms were thick ropes of muscle. His biceps were fricken huge. With the dried blood under his nose, the bruises on his arms, there was no denying he’d been in a fist fight. “What happened to you?” She couldn’t stop herself from asking.

Hawkeye looked over at her. “Classified.”

Right. Sure.

The door dinged open.

Darcy led the way down the corridor. She pulled her key card from her back pocket as she reached her room. Hawkeye stepped in front of her and held out his hand for the keycard. Darcy hesitated but decided it wasn’t worth the debate and handed it over.

He opened the door and entered.

She waited a minuet. 

“You’re clear.” He said appearing back at the door. She entered without a word, focusing in on the large bed that took up most of the small room. “You okay, Lewis?” A voice asked behind her. She was so tired. Darcy slid her shoes of her numb feet. They still hurt even though they felt numb. How did that work? She didn’t know. The bed was surprisingly soft as she crawled up on it, she didn’t bother to reach the top and use the pillows or try and get under the covers. She didn’t even remove her glasses. Just laid on the middle of the comforter and let her eyes close. The darkness swallowed her quickly.

When she woke rays of sunshine were barley starting to creep across the sky. It had to be really early. She was still exhausted. There was a soft clicking sound and when she final pried her eyes open she saw Hawkeye had found her laptop.

She must not have locked it last night.

Unless he was a hacker on top of being a spy….assassin?…agent thing.

Her nose twitched and Darcy forced herself into a more upright position. Everything ached horribly but something smelled good enough to lure her from rest. There was a tray of pancakes, a bagel, and some fruit in a cup sitting on a tray on the nightstand beside her. “You need some sugar.” Hawkeye said without turning away from the computer. He was reading something that looked like it had awfully small print. She hadn’t realized how hungry she was until she took the first bite. Darcy was a notoriously slow eater, always the last to finish when she went out with friends, but she devoured the breakfast tray incredibly quickly. “Thank you.” She remembered to say once she was finished.

Hawkeye shrugged, still reading, “Don’t thank me too much. It’s your money. Charged it to the room.”

“You find out what’s happening? Why people are trying to shoot as us?” She asked

“Maybe.”

When he didn’t seem inclined to extrapolate on that vague answer Darcy pulled herself off of the bed with a sigh, “I’m going to shower.” He didn’t say anything to that either. With a shrug she grabbed some clean clothes from the top of her duffle and limped over to the bathroom on tired feet. She ended up sitting on the shower floor, letting hot water run over her head and rubbing at the knots in her feet. The water ran a disgusting gray for a few minutes over the white tiles before finally going clear. Muscles sagged in the delicious heat. Never before had a shower felt so damn good. She stayed for a good long while under the heat before forcing herself to stand back up, shut off the water, dry, and slip into her comfortable sweatpants. She brushed her teeth half-heartedly and dragged a comb through her hair to combat possible tangles.

Finished she headed back out to the main room, flopped back on the bed and kicked her way under the covers. Hawkeye was still on her computer. He needed to shower. He probably smelled worse than Darcy had, sitting next to a dumpster for who knew how long. He was going to make her laptop stink. She missed her phone. He owed her a new one. _Put that on the tab. Illuminati, you currently owe Darcy Lewis: one iPod, one Samsung galaxy phone_. She sat back up again. “Ok, seriously, care to share with the class?” She asked. He finally looked over blinking and Darcy resisted the urge to scream, “Do you or do you not know what the _shit_ is going on?!”

He sighed, clicked a few more times on the laptop and spun it around so she could see the screen. There was a picture of some giant ship thing crashing, smoke and fire curling up into the air. With a jolt she wondered if aliens were attacking again and she’d somehow missed it but the headline across the top read ‘DC Disaster- Captain America a Fugitive?’ She frowned. “What the fuck?”

“That about sums it up.” Hawkeye agreed. He was watching her closely again, “So far as I can tell, no one knows that the fuck is going on. A bunch of highly classified information got dumped on the internet, S.H.I.E.L.D. helicarriers exploded in the sky over D.C., there are rumors that H.Y.D.R.A. has reappeared and I can’t seem to reach anyone.”

H.Y.D.R.A.? Jesus. What the fuck? That was a name she hadn’t heard since American History class. Darcy threw her hands in the air. “Well that had nothing to do with me!” She exclaimed only to immediately wonder if that wasn’t a suspicious thing to say.

He seemed to find it amusing though because his lips twitched like he was suppressing a smile. “Right. Because it was the invisible force of the universe compelled you to come to Chicago and walk down an alley to find me.”

Darcy huffed and flopped back on the bed, narrowly missing knocking her head on the headboard. “Why would they be shooting at me if I was trying to kill you or whatever? Wouldn’t we be buddies with common goals then? You said they were shooting at you earlier too. Why _where_ they shooting at _me_ anyway?!”

“I didn’t say you were working for them and I’m not sure why they were targeting you.” He said mildly like he hadn’t implied it. What a jerk. “How does it work?” He asked sounding like he was trying to give her the benefit of the doubt.

She didn’t need to ask to what he was referring. “Work? I mean. I don’t know. I just like, like I said, I _know_ I need to do something and then I go do it.”

He hummed a curious sound at that. “Must be handy. To just know things? Know the right thing to do at the right moment.”

“It’s not like that.” She denied trying not to get frustrated, “It’s not what you think it is. Look. Sometimes I just go do something. I’m like, fates errand girl or something. It’s not like- it’s not a super power or anything. It’s not something I control. Mostly it’s just stupid stuff that I never know why I’m doing anyway- go put a dollar on a bookshelf in the library type of thing.” Darcy was really not good at talking about this kind of stuff. She got like, emotional motion sickness.

“Sounds like a really shitty spy movie mission.”

Darcy glanced over at him. It was impossible to read his face of course. She was pretty sure he thought she was crazy. “_Look_, the important part is- I’m not here to sabotage you or anything. “

He laughed a little at that as if she wasn’t being serious. Sensing this wasn’t going to get anywhere she changed the subject. “Did you sleep at all last night?” she asked. He gave her a bland look she interpreted as a ‘no’. “Look just, we’re safe enough for the moment right?” She ignored his indecisive shrug, “Take a nap for a few hours, you can take the bed. I won’t leave the hotel or anything. I’ll go hang in the pool or something and then we can regroup and figure out what were ganna do.” She stumbled only at the end of her suggestion, unsure why she was assuming they were going to stick together.

He looked about ready to argue then frowned and ran a hand over his face, slumping a little in his seat as though in defeat. “Yeah, ok.”

“Stay on top of the duvet if you’re not going to shower first.” She remarked gathering up her swimsuit and her room key. She took a deep breath once the heavy door swung shut behind her. The hallway was blessedly empty.

Down at the pool she changed quickly in the dressing room and waded in from the shallow end until the water licked at her waist. Darcy raised her feet and kicked off towards the deeper end of the pool to do laps. There were a couple of children in the shallow end, an elderly grandma lifting water weights, and that was about it. Not too bad crowding wise. The water rippled pleasantly past her and she dived down to get her hair wet. It floated out around her like a halo before she rose back to the surface. Darcy kicked hard with her legs, touching the rough edge of the pool with her hand, twisting around to brace her feet on it and kicking off again. 

She wasn’t sure where the sudden burst of energy for this from was coming from. She was still really tired but her brain was loud right now and swimming seemed to be helping at least a little.

She didn’t know why she was here. Not like, in the pool, but like, _here_ in Chicago.

This was definitely the craziest thing she had ever done for a request. This was like, Aidan join the military at 18 and leave everyone you know and love behind chasing something that was going to get you killed, kind of crazy. People were legit shooting at her.

She wasn’t sure what to make of Hawkeye either. He was a part of some undercover government organization that stole Janes work, even if Thor had eventually forced them to bring it back. That was sketch, right? Super sketch? She was also not a fan of being threatened with guns or being severally distrusted like _she_ was the one who worked for a shady organization. No one liked to be around someone who thought they were crazy and/or evil. On the other hand, he had saved her life _probably_ and Darcy was very much a fan of living.

She twisted in the water, feeling her aching muscles stretch.

She didn’t know what happened now. She was like, being shot at she guessed. For reasons still unknown. Because she worked for Jane? Probably. It was the only thing Darcy could think of anyway. Jesus. She swam for several more laps before climbing up one of the little ladders and wrapping herself in a soft towel. Darcy wrung out her hair and sat down on one of the pool lounge chaises. It was nice and warm here. She needed another minute before she could stand to interact with humans again.

She glanced at the clock. She’d been here just over 2 hours so she headed into the changing room to rise off chlorine, change, and head back to the room. It was dark inside when she opens the door. Window blinds drawn shut and the lights off. Hawkeye was curled up much like she had been last night, on top of the duvet as she requested and still dirty. Although, it looked like maybe he has washed his face? Weirdo. Why not just shower then?

Darcy tiptoed over to the desk, pulled up her laptop and forced herself to read a few of the news articles about DC. Hawkeye was right that things were pretty unclear. Lots and lots of speculation but that was about all anyone had at the moment. Darcy logged into her Rising Tide account via Tur. Most of her fellow hackers were chatting about the large data dump. People were saying it was Black Widow who released it. Jesus. It was a lot. When Hawkeye had said classified information got dumped she hadn’t really stopped to think what that meant. There were lists of agents and all of their aliases, private information of people under witness protection, social security numbers, and sensitive mission information. It was all right there. Jesus. 

With a sinking feeling she ran a search for ‘Jane Foster’ and her bosses’ information popped up; Name, address, last known location, a brief history of her research and her connection to Thor. Oh _god_. ‘Darcy Lewis’ brought up her family address, mother’s maiden name, her Culver university form address. There was a note about her brother’s military service in Afghanistan. Her fricken blood type?! Darcy closed her eyes for a moment felling like she was going to be sick.

Right. Ok. She put out an ‘ask’ on the Rising Tide message boards looking for hackers who wanted to help stem the damage this leak had, and would continue, to cause. Responses came in almost immediately, hackers willing to help pull and cover the information released on innocent people. With a crack of the knuckles she got to work, focusing first on her and Jane’s information and then moving on to other witnesses whose private information had been leaked. By the time she looked at the clock it was going on noon.

Darcy rubbed her eyes. She needed coffee.

She found an electric kettle and those little tea and coffee packets hotels left out. A click of the handle button and the water began to boil just as Hawkeye rolled over. His hair was even worse now and the confused tired blinking certainly made him look more birdlike. “Coffee?” His voice still deep with sleep.

“Uh, yeah. Probably crappy coffee though.”

The man stumbled out of bed, as ungraceful as she had ever seen him, and approached the whistling kettle. He then proceeded to poor the tiny coffee mug next to the kettle full to the very brim and down the thing. That was mildly horrifying. Darcy blinked, watching him refill the mug and do it again. When he filled the mug a third time he seemed to spot the little sugar packets. He snatched a handful of them, ripped them all open together, and dumped the sugar into his mug. Wow. He stood there, hands wrapped around the pathetic hotel mug, and took a deep but far slower sip.

He slumped back onto the bed in a hunched over sit. “What are you doing?” He yawned.

“Something.” She says just to be obnoxious.

He looked over at her, eyes sharp over the rim of the coffee mug.

She rolled her eyes. “I _was_ trying to see if there was anything I could do about the data leak.” He cocked his head like a bird at her. He had an awful cowlick on the side of his head she immediately decided not to tell him about. “I hacked Shield before dude. I mean, this is obviously like, crazy amounts of data and most of the damage is already done but it can’t hurt to try and pull information now before it has a chance to spread too far.”

He frowned a little curiously at her. “You hacked S.H.I.E.L.D.?” He sounded a little incredulous.

“How do you think we got Thor out of your guyses grubby hands?”

“Huh,” He took another sip of coffee.

“Speaking of Shield, do we have like, a plan?” Darcy picked at the hem of her sleeve.

Hawkeye placed the empty mug down. “Working on it. I think it’s best to stay here, at least a little while longer.”

“Hey, whatever you say Mr. Illuminati.”

“That’s Agent Illuminati to you.” He said with a small smirk.

They ordered room service again that night, Hawkeye unwilling to let her leave the shelter of their room for food if it could be conveniently brought to them. He stole back her laptop as the sun went down and went back to typing away. Darcy left him to it. She placed her glasses a few inches from the edge of the night stand, closed her eyes, and was out.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Alright, looks like I lied about being better at replying to comments last week. I'm sorry. Please do know that every single comment and kudos is very appreciated even if I don't get around to answering. I've been working on a little one shot for the winter holidays and then another plot bunny jumped me. So I've been working on things. Hope you all enjoyed this chapter.


	8. chapter 7

(Darcy – Age 15)

Her parents go on a ‘vacation’ during her freshman year of high school. Darcy got to watch the house. Not that she would have want to go with them- she knew they were actually going to be spending the time at some couples counseling resort thing. Darcy’s young but she’s not an _idiot_ thanks. Her mom left the pamphlets on the dryer with dates circled. The arguing has only gotten worse. They’re not like, violent or anything, but shouting is no unusual occurrence at the Lewis home.

So whatever. Her parents left Saturday morning and were due back the next Sunday, Darcy got to watch the house. It was fine. She was 15, not like, a kid anymore. They leave her money and a ton of emergency phone numbers just in case anyway and honestly there would be nothing worth remembering about that week if it hadn’t been for her bit of a break down coinciding with it.

Nothing really brings it on that she can remember. No trigger or anything. In truth Darcy often felt more comfortable alone then she did around people, so it wasn’t the empty house that bothered her. She was just- thinking. Thinking about Aidan- how much she missed him. Her parents- how much longer was their marriage going to last? She thought about crazy old ladies who live out of their RV’s, all alone.

And she was really tired too which probably didn’t help.

Tired of waking up anxious at night, feeling need and panic for things and places and people she doesn’t understand. She was tired of walking into a store she didn’t shop at and buying shit she didn’t need for people she didn’t know. Tired of being led on this chain and floating in this ocean without answers.

It snuck its way in from the dark corners of her thoughts where it has always hidden and festered louder than ever before- what if she was just crazy? Delusional with social anxiety? Molded by childhood trauma and influenced by some crazy lady’ she that that one time? It was the most probable answer right? And why not? Just tack on ‘potentially schizophrenic’. Why not?

Or what if- what if…even worse, what if it was real? It was real and her life would always be her being dragged around by the whims of fate? And nothing in her life would ever be her own. Because how would she ever know? What achievement could she trust to have earned herself and not have had it been the results of chance to get her into a position for some other errand of fate?

Lady lucks grocery girl.

Fates eternal unpaid intern.

A feverish, mad desire to _prove_ her own free will consumed her. Darcy curled up in her bed. Didn’t answer the phone, didn’t go to school, and didn’t answer the front door. She stayed in the same pajamas. She avoided social media and stuck to watching reruns of ‘Whose Line’ on YouTube.

By Thursday a fatal flaw in her plan was revealed when the kitchen ran bare. Not so much as a ramen noodle packet left. The money her parents had left for groceries still sitting on the table where they had left it. Darcy stared at it numbly. She swallowed dryly and forced a deep breath.

Her stomach grumbled hungrily. She’d been crying on and off all week long but the urge hit her again now. Jesus Christ. Darcy took another deep breath, blinking away tears before they fell. She marched back upstairs to put on a clean set of sweat pants and brush her teeth for the first time all week. She jammed one of Aidan’s old black beanies on her head.

She’d already done it, she tried to convince herself, a whole 6 days without a _request_. She had nothing left to prove. She has her own free will.

She ignored the laughter in the back of her head.

But there wasn’t any pressure, no pull in her gut. Maybe that was just because she was so damn hungry. The shakes and nausea had both set in. She was craving sugar. Carbs.

Darcy set off for the little grocery store that was just around the corner, money stuffed in her pants pocket, music blasting in her headphones from her old school cd player. Eyes glued to the sidewalk she tried to ignore the world.

Nothing happened.

She grabbed food off of shelves, paid for it like a normal person, and left. The tension in her built with every step towards home. Something had to happen. It had to.

She fiddled with her keys. Opened the front door and closed it with an elbow.

Nothing happened.

Darcy stood in the hallway. The bags were heavy in her hands. Eventually her feet move her to the kitchen. She put the food away. Turned off her music. Forged a note from her mom for the school and deleted messages off the answering machine. She stuffed a slice of bread in her mouth. Went to sleep well before dark.

She got up on Friday and went to school.

It was as if all the energy had been drained out of her. She felt numb. Sort of hallow. Nothing happened at school either, she just sat in class and let the words run over her like a waterfall while her pile of make-up work grew ever larger.

Just- nothing.

The bell rang at the end of the day and the students converged, filing out the rusted double doors towards freedom in droves. Darcy rolled a left over quarter from lunch between her fingers absentmindedly. Several people push past her impatiently as she ambled slowly towards the doors.

She stepped through the door frame.

Nothing happened.

Maybe it was all in her head then. She was just a kid influenced by her older brother’s over active imagination or something. That was all. The thought was relieving and sickening.

And then- then several things _did_ happen. All at once.

There was a scuffle from behind, someone tripping over the door stop, and a hand caught the back of Darcy’s sweater. Darcy fell. The quarter shot from her hand and rolled back through the other open door as she tried to catch herself. The door behind her banged closed.

A voice somewhere behind the now closed door, “Alyson? Alyson! Thank god I caught you! I have to tell you-“

“Ah hell yeah! Extra quarter!” a boy by the vending machines.

Screams.

The bang of the closing door had startled several students in the parking lot. Someone had been hit by a car in the brief confusion. People were screaming. Teacher were rushing around. The boy behind her, she vaguely recognizes his face but couldn’t remember his name, scrambled to his feet and ran towards the scene without a glance at her. Darcy crawled over to one of the bushes and vomited.

She doesn’t try to ignore it again.

+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=

Darcy pulled herself up from sleep and lifted her head. “Good morning.” She mumbled hoarsely. Ugh, her voice was like sandpaper. Jesus she was still exhausted. She blinked around wearily for her guest.

It didn’t take long to find him, Hawkeye was curled up in the arm chair by the window, back to the wall so he could see the door. _That couldn’t be comfortable_, she thought vaguely. There was still a faint stream of dried blood beneath his nostrils and a rim of grime around the clearness of his face where he seemed to have quickly washed. Damn- she couldn’t even hear him breathing…_was he breathing_? Her blurry vision focused in on his chest for a moment- she seized her glassed form the bedside table and jammed them on. Yes, just faintly she could see the rise and fall. Good. So at least she didn’t have a dead person in her hotel room to top the week off.

He rolled his head and pried open his eyes. Immediately he glanced over at her with deeply hazy eyes. The confused blinking was that of a man clearly still half asleep. “Mornin.” His voice was incredibly gruff. The doe dreary eyed expression stirred something in Darcy. He looked a little like Jane those nights where everything was too much and she forgot how to be human.

Jesus, she swore she never used to be the mom friend type. “You need a shower.” She told him, stretching and rising from the cocoon of heat the bed offered. Very purposely she did not put her hands on her hips. She was not that far gone damn it.

“Hmm?” He blinked at her.

“Dude, you were sitting next to a dumpster for who knows how long and you’ve still got dried blood under your nose.” He shifted a little, almost self-consciously. Ran a hand softly under his nose against the dried blood trail. He stood awkwardly, like he was suddenly unsure of what to do with his hands. Darcy turned away and busied herself with the little kettle. “I’ll put coffee on. It’ll be ready when you get out.” She told him, remembering how he had coveted the drink.

“You don’t mind?” He asked with a nod to the bathroom door.

What a weirdo. Darcy shook her head and resisted to say something along the lines of _finally_, “All yours.”

“Right. Thanks.” He shuffled toward the bathroom. It was kind of creepy to see him walk past out of her peripheral vision and not hearing a sound. She wouldn’t have known he was there if she hadn’t been watching. Cr-eepy.

With the kettle heating, Darcy pulled out a fresh set of clothes. A simple black tee, a big comfortable red sweater she’d found at Savers a few months ago and some soft leggings. She wasn’t feeling real pants at the moment. She turned the red beanie over in her hands. It was worn and a little frayed at the bottom. Still so soft. With a blink she pushed it on to her head.

There was a buzz. Darcy barely managed to take a step towards the door before it was opening. A tall man with long ginger hair stepped into the room. Dressed in a far too small button down and a navy vest with black dress pants several inches too short he looked like sort of like hotel staff but really, really janky. A small little placard on the vest read ‘Mary’. 

“Who are you!?” She demanded hurrying over.

Under the faint scruff around his mouth the line of his lips were hard. Brown cold eyes. “Mary.” He? (They?) said in a bland tone. “From the front desk.” Darcy had several nonbinary and Trans friends she’d met in college but she was getting the feeling this was more a case of this dude potentially _killing_ some girl and stealing her uniform. He? (They?) seemed amused by her unease, like he was being deliberately blatant in the lie. There was a suspicious blot on the collar of the dress shirt that had her stomach rolling dangerously. Now there was the faintest hint of a smile in their lips.

“Oh- sorry. I just- didn’t- I was about to change.” She finished weakly. _And am a little freaked out that you barged right into my room! _She missed her taser.

They hum an ambiguous sound, eyes scanning over the room and back towards her. “Apologies.” They said in the same utterly bland voice, not sounding sorry at all. “Just wanted to confirm that this wasn’t yours.” They held out some passport. Darcy didn’t recognize the color, it was defiantly not an American passport.

“Umm no?” _Like the name or picture wouldn’t have told you that?_ She could hear the sound of running water cut off from the bathroom. It gave her a probably unjustified feeling of comfort.

“I see.” They were still staring at her, blinking hooded eyes. “Thank you. Enjoy the rest of your stay.” Darcy stood frozen as they walked back to the door. They opened it and walked out. The slow catch hinge caught the door as it closed and it swung the rest of the way shut painfully slow. Darcy walked over and put her hand on the door. For the briefest moment there was a counter pressure, as if someone was pushing back, preventing the door from fully locking. Then it was gone, and the door clicked shut. She threw on the deadbolt and the chain lock.

That was- not good.

Really not good.

Darcy changed at record speed, peeling off dirty clothes and started stuffing her things back into her bag. She was maybe starting to panic again.

Hawkeye emerged from the bathroom moments later, steam drifting out from the open door. He was already dressed (in the same clothes he’d been wearing before since he didn’t have another pair), hair and shirt damp like he hadn’t dried properly before throwing on his clothes. “What’s going on?” He asked with dark eyes.

“We need to go.” Darcy told him shakily.

Hawkeye didn’t ask what happened he just nodded calmly, “Let’s go then.” Right ok. Darcy took a breath and grabbed her duffle bag and laptop. Hawkeye held the door for her and took the bag gently from her while they walked to the elevator and slung it easily over his shoulder. They checked out, Darcy talking to the concierge while Hawkeye stood at her shoulder.

Somehow Hawkeye managed to procure them a car. Darcy didn’t ask, just gently tossed her laptop in with her bag in the back and went to sit shotgun. Hawkeye pulled away from the hotel and weaved them smoothly though morning city traffic. There was a bit of a kerfuffle when they had to decide where they were actually going. Hawkeye wanted to head for DC. Darcy thought that was a spectacularly stupid idea. “Aren’t you like, on the run now? Shouldn’t you be wanting to get _away_ from the crazy Nazi cult?” Her voice is probably a little sharper than it should be but Jesus what the fuck? 

His fingers tightened on the steering wheel. “That’s where my partner will be.”

_Black Widow?_ Darcy titled her head a little. “Ok. Maybe. But won’t they be wanting to get out too? They’ll be heading away from DC too won’t they?” There was a near imperceivable shrug in his shoulders. Good, avoiding being shot at again was one of Darcy’s new top priorities. Darcy pushed the advantage, “I think we should head west.”

“And go where?”

Ok that was a good point. Darcy contemplated for a moment. Her mind was spinning a bit but the answer came clear to her eventually. “Malibu.” She suggested after a minute. “Doesn’t Iron Man have a house there? He’d help, right? I mean unless you already have his cell number and he’s not picking up or something.”

He was quiet.

A thought she’d had floating around in her head since last night finally blurted its way out, “Or we could split up.”

He gave her a look. “You’re a civilian and we don’t know why the people last night were shooting at you. I can’t leave you alone and I don’t feel comfortable dropping you with the local police if I can’t guarantee their vetting.”

She kind of wanted to tell him off that she could look after herself but, well, trained super-spy she was not and the people potentially chasing her had guns. So, she was kind of glad he was planning on sticking around. He’d make a good meat shield. Her hands were shaking a little.

“Hey, look at me.”

She did. Stared into his dark ringed eyes, the messy blonde hair, and slightly crooked nose. There was a scrape on his forehead that was scabbed over and a bit of scruff around his chin. Those strange eyes of his captured hers were kind of magnetic. “It’s ganna be ok. I’m not going to let you get killed.” Darcy felt the panic ebb a little at the unquestionable sincerity in his voice. She might not be equipped to deal with this shit but he actually was. She nodded tightly. She took a deep breath, “Ok. So, Malibu?”

He drummed his fingers a little then sighed, “Alternative- regional SI headquarters?”

Darcy blinked. “Oh, yeah. That would work.” With a company as big as Stark Industries there were bound to be multiple headquarters. They may not be able to put them in contact with Tony Stark himself but they could probably contact Pepper Potts for them. Probably a lot faster than driving all the way to Malibu too. “Do you know where the closest one is?”

He tossed something at her with a casual, “google it and plug it into the GPS, jot down the directions then turn it back off and take out the battery.”

Darcy barely caught the object and frowned. Turning it around in her hands a familiar home screen greeted her. Her phone? She scowled at him. “How long have you had this?” She demanded.

“Yeah sorry,” He rubbed the back of his neck like an asshole, “Grabbed it in the alley. Wasn’t sure I could trust you. Also, I should probably ask, how much cash do you have on you?”


	9. Chapter 8

So it turned out the nearest SI headquarters was in Atlanta, Georgia. 11 fricken hours away. Like a third of the time it would have taken to get to Malibu but still a majorly gross drive.

“Are you _sure_ you don’t have anyone’s cell numbers or anything that we could just call?”

“No.” He sighed sounding just as dejected as she felt by that.

Still didn’t stop her from feeling irrationally irritated. Darcy tried to suppress a scowl. “Aren’t you guys some kind of super team? Shouldn’t you have each other’s contact information?”

“Look if there was a ‘Meet and Greet’ before the crazy shit went down in New York I wasn’t a part of it. And it’s not like we kept in contact after.”

_Yeah ok. Fair point_, she thought, still annoyed.

With a huff Darcy wrote the google directions down on a napkin then googled directions to a bunch of other cities just to be safe. She switched the phone off and removed the battery and sim card. Before they left Illinois, Hawkeye had her withdrawal a bit more money from an ATM and then traded in one car for another one. 

Hawkeye was driving. Darcy was fine with that- she didn’t like to drive without a GPS on. She got overly anxious about getting lost, didn’t have a good grasp on directions or mental geography. Could never remember street names or route numbers either. She was better with landmarks which didn’t really help while driving to places she’d never been before.

An hour and a half into their silent drive, around nine fifteen, Hawkeye pulled into a McDonalds drive through. Feeling slightly less annoyed now, Darcy raised an eyebrow at him.

“I _need_ coffee.” He told her like a dying man craving water. She would argue but he had deep circles around his eyes that she didn’t think were entirely due to his bruised nose. Darcy wondered for the first time how much sleep he’d gotten last night. They inched forward a little in the obnoxiously long line. “Do you want anything?” He asked looking over at her like a peace offering. She shook her head softly. It was too early for them to be serving chicken nuggets. Coffee in an archer’s hand, and an extra in a cup holder, they pulled back onto the interstate.

Perhaps it was the Adrenalin of the last few days wearing off (heck, last few years if she was honest,) but she found herself incredibly tired. Resting her head on the window, feeling the little bumps in the road as they sped along, Darcy closed her eyes and drifted. When she woke some forty minutes later Hawkeye had turned on the radio to some country station. Some dude crooned softly about horses. Darcy didn’t think she had ever met someone who willingly listened to country music.

She glanced at the clock and stretched out her legs as much as she could. Jesus, like 8 more hours.

Being trapped in a car for hours on end gets boring, really fast, even, it turns out, when you’re on the run from a Nazi cult. 

“So, been busy since Puente Antiguo?” she inquired awkwardly. She sort of knew he had been after all, seen images of him and the rest of the Avengers all over the news for saving New York. But that was kind of surreal so she was trying not to think about it over much. “Steal anyone else’s life’s work?” she couldn’t help but add.

“Classified.” He said obnoxiously, “And we did give Foster’s stuff back.”

‘Classified’, Darcy was beginning to hate that phrase just as much as she hated seeing the words ‘Please advise’ while answering Jane’s emails. “Classified, right. Mr. Classified. Like the Avengers aren’t all over the news.” She rolled her eyes. “And I never did get my iPod back! I had like a bunch of playlists on that thing!”

Hawkeye shrugged.

A thought suddenly occurred to her. “Hey, where is your bow? That’s your thing right? Archer?”

He moaned a little like he was in physical pain, “I was undercover and didn’t have it with me. It’s probably locked in some Hydra bunker by now.” He seemed pretty bummed about it.

“That sucks.” Darcy replied elegantly.

The archery was pretty cool she guessed. She’d seen footage of him jumping off a building and repelling down on a rope shot from his bow. Still, you would think a gun would be more efficient. Maybe it had a stealth advantage but didn’t they have fancy silencers now-a-days? Darcy didn’t know enough about it to say. “Where does one even learn archery anymore?” She wondered aloud.

He looked kind of amused. “They have archery ranges you can go to. That’s how most people learn.”

_Huh_, Darcy thought. The more you know.

“But I learned archery in the circus.”

Darcy blinked. “Wait what?!” she sat up from her slouch. “No shit?! You were in the circus!?”

He laughed at her excitement. “Yeah, for a couple a years.”

“My brother was all into that shit growing up, ‘run away, join the circus.’ He was a total Pippin fanatic… We saw it once as kids and he was hooked.” Darcy shook her heard clear as old memories drifted up, “If you haven’t seen it- Pippin, is like, a musical about a kid of runs off to join the circus. I think. It’s been a long time since I last saw it.” She settled back into her seat with a grin, “Didn’t realize I was traveling with Carnie folk.” She had to laugh. “Did you walk the tight rope?!”

“Sometimes.” He shrugged like that wasn’t the coolest shit. His smile was a little cool.

Darcy wondered if she was being annoying and tried to dial back the excitement a little. It was just really cool. You never meet people like that. Or at least you never meet them and know. How often did you meet people that were like, ‘ah yeah I used to be a traipse artist’ or whatever? Like never. “You didn’t like it?”

“It was fine. A long time ago, yeah know?”

“What, you didn’t get enough applause?” She couldn’t help but tease.

He shot her a cocky grin at that, “Pff- I was the Amazing Hawkeye. I got plenty of applause.”

“Oh my god! That was your actual stage name?!” She wondered if there was video of that. She’d have to do some digging later. Frowning slightly she tilted her head to really look at him again. Just how old was he? He didn’t look that old…that he had time to be a _former_ carnie and train enough to become an elite agent in some secret government branch was kind of strange wasn’t it? Just when had he joined Shield?….outlandish thoughts of children running away to join the circus suddenly didn’t seem so fanciful.

“You have a brother?” he asked pulling Darcy from her thoughts.

“Ah- yeah. He’s-,” She hesitated, “Army. In Afghanistan.”

He nodded in understanding then switched lanes to get out of the way of some asshole speeding up behind them in a sports car.

Darcy looked back out the window. ‘What about you? Do you have a brother?’ she asked in her head. Should she ask if he had any family? If he had a brother? Or a sister? Or any family? It was on the tip of her tongue to ask but he was a spy, wasn’t he? He probably wouldn’t want to talk about that. Or would he? Was it too late to say something now?

Her head whipped back around when he started talking again, “Can I ask you something?”

“Uh- Sure.”

Why did you stick around after all the crazy that hit in New Mexico?”

Now it was Darcy’s turn to shrug. “I don’t know,” she admitted, “I liked Jane? And Thor? It just didn’t really cross my mind to leave I guess.”

Hawkeye nodded again. “Shared trauma. That’ll do it. Make you best friends for life.” He said sounding like he was speaking from experience.

They were nearing Kentucky when they finally ran into a problem. Not like, the Nazi kind of trouble though, the more mundane traffic kind. The car crawled to a stop. Before them was a vast sea of red break lights. No one was moving. They sat unmoving for several moments. Then several minutes more. Hawkeye glared at the car in front of them as though trying to move it with his mind. It didn’t move. He tapped his fingers against the steering wheel.

She looked over at the clock. Jesus.

30 minutes now and they still hadn’t moved.

Hawkeye thrusts the shift into park with a scowl and turned off the car. He was eerily still now, staring into the void of cars stopped before them.

“So” Darcy dragged out the word, casting around for some safe topic to share with a super assassin spy. “Ah-…you said your partner would be in DC. That’s Black Widow, right? Your partner?” Cocking her head after a second of though she added, “Aren’t all the Avengers your partner?”

“Natasha and I have been partners for a long time. For years before the Avengers formed.”

“Oh.”

“And yeah, I’m certain she was in DC. Her and Cap.” He shoulders were tense. In hindsight, this was probably the wrong topic for conversation.

Awkward.

“She’s pretty badass from the footage I’ve seen. She like, somersaulted onto one of those flying alien jet-skis.” Darcy told him carefully.

He snorted at that, shifting back in his seat a bit. “Sounds like Nat.” He glanced over at the dashboard clock and sighed. “We’re going to have to find another hotel. By the time we get there the place is ganna be closed.”

Darcy looked at the clock too and did some mental math. Jesus. He was right. Just over an hour sitting still and they still had like seven hours left before they hit Atlanta. Ugh. She looked over at the man beside her. The bruises were blurred against his slightly tanned skin. Forearms and knuckles were a greenish blue hue. He rubbed his face then ran his hand up through his short ruffled hair.

“You could take a nap if you want. I can wake you up when things start to move.” Darcy offered. His gray eyes focused on her for a moment. He seemed hesitant. Darcy resisted the urge to roll her eyes, “I’m not like a super spy or anything but I can keep watch for a while. I did manage to survive New Mexico _and_ London.”

His eyes were really something. She didn’t think she had ever seen eyes like his. After a moment he nodded and adjusted his seat slightly back. He was out in just a moment. Darcy gazed back out the windshield at the array of red lights and sighed.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the delay guys, my wifi was out all weekend long. Thankfully it is now fixed.


	10. Chapter 9

Clint was on the high-wire.

The big top was full to bursting in a way it rarely was. The crowd below him a featureless mass that roared wordless noise.

His fingers grasped his bow tightly. He took a careful step and felt the wire and the muscles of his feet shift to keep grip. Balloons floated up from the center ring as the clowns released them. Clint reached back for an arrow. His fingers brushed open air. Where was his quiver?

Where was his quiver?

Fingers brushed nothing again so they fell to his shoulder. There was no contact with the familiar leather strap. Just nothing. His legs were starting to shake in a way they hadn’t done in years. His feet were burning. The wire shifted and Clint clenched to stay balanced. Where was his quiver? The balloons were floating, floating, floating up above and bumping into the tent ceiling. He was supposed to have popped them by now. The crowd was roaring. What the fuck was wrong with him? Where the fuck was his quiver?

“Don’t fuck this up for me Clint.”

Barney? Barney hated the high-wire. Clint turned his head slightly to glance behind him. Nothing but open air and the shifting wire. “Barney?”

Where was his quiver?

Something touched him. Clint’s eyes snapped open and the tent vanished. He was in the car. Right. Lewis. Hydra. Nat. Traffic jam.

“I think we’re ganna be moving soon.” Darcy was saying as she slowly pulled her hand back.

Clint yawned wide, rubbing at his neck. He had a bit of a crick. Ugh. But Darcy was right, the cars in front of them were finally starting to inch forward. Pulling his seat back up right he turned the car back on. It was a crawls pace but at least they were moving now.

Thankfully that seemed to be the last of their trouble. It was a smooth ride for the next four hours or so. Interstate and highway rolling past in a blur. At a particularly full looking exit Clint finally pulled off the interstate. Choices here looked good; cheap hotels and a few restaurants too.

Food. God Clint was starving. But- he glanced down at his clothes with a frown. They were looking pretty beat up and gross with all they had endured. “Mind if we stop somewhere real quick before food?” Clint asked, “I kind of wanted to get something new to change into.” Darcy agreed with a relieved nod so Clint took it to mean his clothes probably smelled worse than he had presumed.

They end up at a Walmart, browsing through the limited men’s section awkwardly together. Definitely not a good idea to slip up though. Clint could handle awkward. He grabbed a black sleeveless t-shirt almost immediately and found a pair of cargo pants pretty easily too. The sweatshirt selection left a little something to be desired though. He flicked his choices unhappily. In the back of the athletic clearance section he finally struck gold. It was bright neon purple. Soft too. Clint frowned at Darcy’s dubious expression when he turned with it on his arm for purchase. “I like purple.” He muttered defensively.

Darcy wandered a bit while Clint searched through the packs of underwear. He was carefully to keep a close eye on her but she seemed to just be looking mindlessly at the socks. So that was fine. Selections made, he called her over and they made their way to check out together. A pair of repulsively purple socks with little ice cream cones on them flopped on to the belt. Clint couldn’t quite repress the grin when he saw them.

They shoved the shopping bag of clothes in the back of the car with Darcy’s duffle and swung around to one of the tiny restaurants. “This ok?” He asked, pulling up at a little pizza place dive. His stomach was just about grumbling in hunger by now. Darcy nodded and pushed open the car door.

Clint held the restaurant door for Darcy when he reached it first. Both polite and an excuse to make sure they weren’t being followed. All clear. It was quiet inside with only a few tables and the staff running around in the back. They were probably more of a pick-up place then an eat-in one. Still the man behind the counter greeted them cheerfully. Clint ordered three slices- two Sausage, onion, jalapeno pepper and one Alfredo bacon. Darcy got two slices of the regular cheese.

They ate in relative quiet at one of the two empty tables.

“Figured we get a hotel here. Finish up the drive tomorrow?” Clint asked her tossing paper plates and used napkins into the trash. Darcy agreed easily enough to his relief. It didn’t take long to pop back in the car and find a cheap looking hotel nearby.

Clint stood casually over Darcy’s shoulder as she requested a room for the night. She was asking for a double bed which was nice. Clint was looking forward to a bed despite the nap in the car. “If you have a room on the top floor that would be preferable.” He cut in.

The lady behind the desk blinked.

He shrugged and smiled. “I have reverse acrophobia,” He said with a straight face.

While Darcy hit the showers, Clint took the opportunity to scan for bugs. Checked under the desk and all its drawers. The inside of the floor lamp and the bedside lights. The frame of the window. It was all clear of course. He hadn’t really been expecting to find anything. When he heard the water running in the bathroom Clint pried off his worn combat boots and flopped on the bed. After a moment of hesitation he reached up and pried his hearing aids out of his ears.

S.H.I.E.L.D.

Clint closed his eyes. Blocked out all sound and sight for just a few seconds. _S.H.I.E.L.D_…. God he had gone soft. Forgotten how it felt to be riding solo without the backing of S.H.I.E.L.D. He remembered being barley eighteen and meeting Coulson for the first time. Fifteen and on the run. Eight and joining the circus. Seven and following Barney out into the night. For one horrible second he desperately missed Barney.

He still had Nat he reminded himself.

Still had Nat.

He picked his head up out of the blankets. He needed to distract himself. Clint reached over for the remote then switched the little TV on. It flickered to life on some news station. He flipped through the limited selection of channels. There was a dog with a little blue hat on the screen. Dog Cops. Hell yes. He hit the button for captions although he hardly needed it with a show like Dog Cops, one of the many reasons he loved it, and settled in. He could already tell what episode this was- Season 6 episode 8.

Clint caught the bathroom door opening out of the corner of his eye. Jammed the small hearing aids back in his ears but he didn’t turn up the volume on the TV. Kept the captions on.

Darcy had her hair wrapped up in a towel twist on top of her head. Nat did that too.

She sat on the edge of the other twin mattress, watching the TV screen. She was dressed in pajamas; blue pants covered with little Thor hammers and a plain white camisole. 

Darcy Lewis was an interesting character.

He’d pretty much forgotten her after the events of New Mexico. Just a civilian vaguely tied to a mission he’d once run. There were thousands of those. He remembered her saving dogs from an animal shelter during the Destroyer’s attack, which had given a point in her favor but that was really all he remembered.

He’d been rather busy after that being mind-controlled by an evil Asgardian, murdering a bunch of his friends and colleagues and then trying to stop an invading alien army from taking over the world.

She would have faded completely from memory if he hadn’t happened across her name in a file on London and the only reason he’d been looking at that is that it had mentioned Thor. Guy had come and gone without checking in and the higher ups wanted to know what they thought from the perspective of someone who had worked with him before. Keeping relations with alien princes happy was imperative.

He’d noticed her name on the dossier. Lewis, Darcy. And thought, _huh, so she’s still in the crazy_.

He hadn’t thought about her again until seeing her in that alley. Truth be told he was considerably impressed with how well she was handling things. Clint had dealt with his fair share of screaming, panicking civilians over the years. Bigger and meaner than her had cried when Clint pinned them against a wall and contemplated blowing their heads off.

She had a mouth on her too, which Clint appreciated. Reminded him a bit of the circus. Not the crappy parts but those rare moments- Trick Shot teaching him to hold a bow. Sitting round a fire at night with the rest of the carnies talking shit and telling stories.

He watched as Darcy brush out her long damp hair. The dampness from the shower making it appear even darker than normal. In his memory he could see her running, face flushed with panic and heat, beanie half clinging to her head and hair whipping about in the chaos as she shoved a tiny puppy into his arms and took off again. Clint thought of ugly purple socks with ice cream cones on them ending up at checkout and her casual shrug at his glance.

Possible delusions aside he liked her. He withheld a scowl at the realization. Damn it. Why did he always have to make things so difficult for himself?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm sorry. I'm the worst. Thank you all for your wonderful comments. The next update should be posting on Friday since I will be going on vacation. Additionally, if you guys are interested I will be posting a One-Shot vaguely holiday themed tonight that also stars Darcy as well- check that out if your interested.


	11. Chapter 10

The drive the next morning flew by in comparison to the first leg of their journey. The traffic kept a steady pace and no Nazi’s try to shove them off the road or shoot at them so it was a pretty good time in Clint’s book. They chatted a little bit about innocuous things, mostly about Thor since he was the one person they both knew in enough capacity to talk about. Darcy was wrapping up a long and detailed rant about Thor and all his amazing powers of Poptart consumption when Clint pushes conversation towards this thing he actually wants to know about. “So you have super powers too?” He asked casually. Clint had seen a lot of weird shit over the years so he knew it wasn’t impossible she was telling the truth but Occam’s razor said it was more likely she was either lying or delusional.

“I told you it’s not like that.” She scowled at him. “I don’t control it. I get a feeling and go do something. That’s all.”

“That’s all?”

“Yes!” She through her hands up in exasperation. “I mean occasionally I can like, hover around and help someone else out but I figure that’s more a side effect- like I give off ‘fate rays’ or whatever.”

“Fate rays?” What the fuck did that mean?

“I like- I don’t know dude. Things just, work out for people I hang around sometimes.”

“Huh.” Sounds fake, but sure. Why not?

“Look I’ll show you sometime dude. Stick around me long enough it’s bound to happen.”

As they entered the city the talk died off though, both of their nerves ramping up again as the large gleaming building came into view.

They stood awkwardly, shoulder to shoulder, in the atrium of Atlanta Georgia’s Stark Industries headquarters. People in business suits hurried past with briefcases. They glanced at each other, feeling obviously out of place. Hawkeye straightened his shoulders and marched over to the reception desk.

Their footsteps echoed on the marble floor.

Darcy stood slightly behind Clint as he stepped right up to the desk. The man behind the counter didn’t look up from his computer. The woman beside him was chatting on a headset in an obnoxiously cheerful voice. Clint said nothing. Just stood there. Darcy rocked back on her heels, still watching business people walking by them and through the electronic locking doors. Eventually the man looked up at Clint. “Good morning. Welcome to Stark Industries! How can I help you?” His perfectly gelled back hair shinning slightly in the florescent light.

“My name is Hawkeye. I’m here on Avengers business. I need to get in contact with Pepper Potts.” Clint said in his best impression of Coulson. His heart clenched a little and he brushed it away impatiently.

The man tilted his head. He kept a pleasant smile plastered on his face. “I see. Do you have an appointment?”

“No. But it is urgent I get in contact with either her or Mr. Stark himself.”

The secretary tapped his finger a little. “I see.” His eyes skimmed between Clint and Darcy. “Well, I’ll see what I can do. I will need to see some ID first.”

Yeah, that was what Clint had been afraid of. He kept his face clear and firm. He hated places like this. “I’m afraid that’s classified, Sir. But it really is quite urgent.” He tried with an even smooth voice. Years of practiced kept him from fidgeting.

Both the man’s eyebrows raised. “Your ID is classified?” He sounded disbelieving. The man’s smile turned a little condescending, “I see. Well, I’m afraid there really isn’t much I can do without some form of identification.”

Yeah this dude thought Clint was an _idiot_.

The composure of his face didn’t so much as flicker even as the uncomfortable twinge hit home. Because look Clint might be stupid but he was _not_ an idiot, ok? Maybe Clint should have looked into getting some fake ID before trying this but he was in a bit of a hurry alright?

Darcy stepped forward and leaned over the desk. “Look dude, this is Hawkeye. Hawkeye, Hero of New York, Avenger. He was on a mission, shit went down, and we’ve hauled ass to get to here. He really needs to get in touch with his co-workers, yeah know? Iron Man? Captain America? Ringin’ a bell?”

The man turned his patronizing smile on Darcy while Clint tried to ignore the twist in his chest at her words. “I understand. But I really can’t do anything without identification. If you don’t have any on you then I really can’t let you through and I’ll have to ask you to leave.”

“Look, I can give you my ID. I work for Dr. Jane Foster? And I can vouch for him. How ‘bout that?”

“Miss, really I-“

“I mean, look at these arms!” Darcy grabbed his left arm and waved it about. She folded it into a flex and slapped his bicep. “Look at this! Maybe you don’t recognize the face but how could you not recognize _these_ from the pictures?”

Clint gently pulled his arm out of her grasp and hoped he wasn’t blushing.

The computer let out a loud _ding_ and the secretary frowned. He moved the mouse and clicked on something. “One moment, please.” The man muttered while he read.

Darcy put her hands on her hips with a glower.

Dr. Gelled Hair typed for a minute. Read something. Then stood up and stepped out from around the large desk with a gesture of his hand. “Please follow me.” Clint frowned. Darcy looked over at him with a raised eyebrow. The slicked back hair man was moving to stand beside one of the locked door. “Please.” He indicated with a hand and a much politer tone, “I apologize for the confusion.”

Clint placed himself in front of Darcy as they made their way over. The man beeped the door with a card and held the door open for them. The door closed behind them and the secretary led the way to what appeared to be a small conference room right behind the door they entered. Clint scanned his eyes over everything carefully.

“Please take a seat. I won’t be but a moment.”

Darcy flopped down in one of the large rolling chairs. Clint remained standing with his eyes trained on the only door. His fingers ached for a bow string. Well, the dude hadn’t been lying at least, the man was back shortly with a laptop that he placed in the center of the desk. He opened the screen, plugged it in, and left in a hurry without a backward glance. Darcy raised an eyebrow at Clint at the man’s quick departure.

“Hello Agent Barton.” Came a voice from the computer.

“Jarvis?” Clint blinked in surprise. Tension eased a bit from him. He had met Stark’s AI briefly after the battle of New York.

Darcy looked confused. “Jarvis? Who’s Jarvis?”

“I am Jarvis. I am Mr. Starks AI assistant. Hello, Ms. Lewis. A pleasure to meet you.”

Darcy opened her mouth to speak but Clint cut her off, too impatient for answers to wait any longer, “Jarvis! Are you able to get in touch with Natasha? Or Cap? I haven’t heard from anyone.”

“My apologies Agent Barton, I am not currently able to contact either Agent Romanoff or Captain Rogers. Footage indicates they were involved in the crashing of the Helicarrier. I am able to find records of Captain Rogers being briefly checked into a hospital in DC but he is no longer there. It seems likely the two of them have ‘gone off the grid’ as it were…I don’t not believe either of them are in immediate danger.”

The hole of worry that has been gnawing at Clint since things had gone to shit finally eased at the words. 

Darcy was looking at him but when he glanced back she turned her attention to the laptop. “What about Iron Man? Or Thor? Would you be able to call Jane for me?”

“I am afraid Mr. Stark and Dr. Foster are both unavailable at the moment. My records indicate Mr. Odinson is currently off planet and therefore unreachable. ”

Darcy blew an unimpressed raspberry, “‘Unreachable’? What does that mean?!”

“Jarvis”

“Yes, Agent Barton?”

“You would be able to take a message for me? Blast it across the airwave?”

“Of course.”

Clint and Jarvis talked for a while. It was a relief to finally feel like he was getting a grip on what was happening. Maria Hill had taken shelter in Stark Tower. There was an unknown friendly flying around on mechanical wings with Natasha and Cap. At least they had some kind of backup. Banner seemed to be a nonentity in all of this which was probably for the best all things considered. Jarvis himself was working, at Mr. Stark’s request, at mitigating damage caused by the data dump: Relocating those under witness protection, trying to contact agents who had been in the field during the collapse, creating and re-vetting those not explicitly listed as Hydra agents. Two hours later Clint was feeling calmer then he had since he had stepped inside Natasha’s safe house and found people waiting to shoot him.

Jarvis gave him directions to a safe house off record of S.H.I.E.L.D. for them to hide out until things cooled down a little and agreed to hold Clint’s message for Nat until she could get in touch.

“Barton huh?” Darcy bumped his side with an elbow as they headed back toward the car. She was grinning like a cat. Clint blinked in confusion. “Barton. That’s your name?”

His feet stumbled the tiniest amount. Had he not told her his name? He thought back for a minute.

Oops.

He shrugged awkwardly. _Play it off Barton_. Stuffing his hands into his pockets he started walking again. For the second time in a day he hoped he wasn’t blushing. “Barton’s my last name. My name’s Clint.” He tried not to be charmed by her delighted laughter behind him.

“Oh my god! That’s great! Clint like, as in ‘Clinton’? That’s so cute! Super-Secret Agent _Clinton_ Barton!”

(Darcy- 18)

Just over a year now. Darcy pulled her eyes from the calendar hanging on her dorm door and back to the mirror. It was still very strange. Not quite real. She blinked and ran the spoolie of mascara over her lashes one final time. She didn’t normally bother with the stuff but well, she was going out tonight. There was a party just off the edge of campus she’d been invited to. Evan seemed like a nice enough guy and although frat parties were not typically her scene she needed to get out of the dorm and meet people. Darcy desperately needed more friends.

It was a ‘black dress party’ apparently. She’d never attended a party that had such specifications as to what colors were allowed before. Wondered if that was a common college thing. ‘Thirsty Thursday’ apparently was a college thing and because she actually had classes tomorrow she wouldn’t be staying too long anyway. Painted nails smoothed the sides of her dress nervously. She was wearing thin little stretchy shorts underneath and was hoping they wouldn’t show through the tight dress. Darcy never wore dresses without them, they prevented any of that awful chaffing between her thighs.

Her poor roommate was stuck at the library cramming for a test she forgot was tomorrow so Darcy was on her own as she stepped out the door and headed for the elevator. She was lucky enough to be in the new freshmen dorm that had only just opened- fresh paint, and spotless carpets. Plus the café right down stairs was a blessing in the mornings.

The elevator descended smoothly and Darcy pushed open the heavy exit door. The night air was clear with just that right amount of wind. Darcy breathed deeply and set off across campus. Despite the late hour there were plenty of people about. Girls in large packs roaming together, giggling and laughing. A couple of late night joggers. Normally Darcy would be a little worried about walking alone this late at night but campus was well lit and the moon was full too. Her heels made a pleasant clicking sound on the asphalt which made them worth the feet ach she was sure she’d be feeling later.

Her mind wandered as she walked.

She could feel her phone buzz in her tiny purse and she pulled it out with a frown. The lit up screen showed a text notification so she unlocked her phone to read it.

‘Hope your feeling all settled in! We love you! –mom’

Darcy had tried for years to tell her mother that she didn’t need to sign her texts, that the phone told Darcy who was texting, but she never listened.

‘Thanks. I’ll call you tomorrow.’ Darcy sent back quickly.

Next things Darcy realized she was walking into the little twenty four hour convenience store on the edge of campus.

Darcy tugged self-consciously at her dress and refused eye contact with the tired looking woman manning the register. She walked the aisles slowly. Snacks, Band-Aids, flue and cold medicine. Hair products, nail polishes, condoms, pregnancy tests. Her feet paused in front of a row of boxes. She let her hand pick one- a yeast infection treatment. Cheeks reddening Darcy walked back to the front of the store and put the box on the counter. The woman rung her up and Darcy handed over her debit card. Almost 40$. Jesus. America’s health care system sucked balls. She snatched the little bag and left, following her feet further off campus. 

She came to an overpass bridge. It was darker now away from the lights of campus and she was starting to get a little nervous realizing suddenly just how far she had walked. Her heels clicked a little on the cement. She was walking faster now, an urgent feeling like she was going to miss a bus tugging at her. It was dank under the bridged like the last rain hadn’t fully dried. Smelled kind of moldy. There was an old shopping cart with the logo long worn off and a little square with flooring made of cardboard. Darcy stepped forward uneasily. She reached into her little plastic bag and removed the receipt and stuffed it into her purse, then dropped the bag onto the cardboard shelter. She backed up quickly, almost stumbling in her heels, and headed back towards the street.

The sky opened back up overhead to reveal the large moon and she felt a little better in the light. She took a moldy free breath. Behind her came the faint scuffling of uneven footsteps. “Hello?” Darcy veered to the right and kept walking. The crinkling of a plastic bag carried towards her as she retreated. “Thank you Lord Jesus. Thank you!” A water voice exclaimed softly.

Darcy hurried back to the dorm at an almost run, got back to her room and flung off her high heels. The careful curls she had spent so much time on had mostly faded by now. Cameron was back from the library and seated at her desk. She turned to look at Darcy at her dramatic entrance. “Thought you were headed to that frat party?” She glanced at the digital clock perched on the window sill. “Little early to be back?”

Darcy wiped her face with some makeup remover by the sink and shrugged easily. “Wasn’t really my scene.” She muttered noncommittally. Soft pajama pants slipped on easily and she was glad to be out of that dress. Probably wouldn’t wear it again. She hauled herself up onto her unnecessarily tall bed. “How was the library?”

Cameron groaned, “I’m totally going to fail.” She waved the book in her hand for emphasis. “This stuff goes in one ear and out the other.”

“I’m sure you’ll be fine.” Darcy reassured her. Cameron was a good student for that she was a little forgetful.

“Want me to turn off the light?” Cameron asked.

“Nah, don’t worry about it.”

She shot a quick text to Evan to let him know she was sorry but she wasn’t going to make it, just on the off chance he worried when she didn’t turn up. She’d probably effectively burned that bridge. Tucking her phone and glasses safely away she closed her eyes and rolled away from Cameron’s desk light. She could still hear the scratchy thankful voice in her head.

She dreamed of Aidan that night. They sat on the beach like they had that one summer he had come back on break from deployment. She ran her hand over his buzzed hair and laughed. He splashed water in her face. A large pelican swooped down and spat out a golden fish onto the sand. It let out some kind of song like a phoenix. But of course it did because it was a phoenix fish. Aidan insisted they needed to bring it home to mom. Darcy held the smooth fish as they walked down a sand path away from the water. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> eeh- Hi. Im super sorry for the long wait. To make it up to you guys I might be dropping an extra chapter on Monday. Thank you again for all your kind comments. Really can't say it enough. Also want to say that I am working on another project right now that I am super excited for! Not sure if any of you are into the Stranger Things fandom but that might be coming from me soon. If any of you are interested in beta-ing (grammer wise of plot wise) let me know cuz I really want it to be good.


	12. Chapter 11

The safe house was beautiful. Well, it was apparently Tony Stark’s so Darcy shouldn’t really have been surprised but it was probably the nicest place she had ever set foot in. Maybe even the nicest looking place she’d ever _seen_\- including in magazines or online.

Darcy was determined to make the most of all the luxurious amenities- this was supposed to be her vacation after all. She spent a good few hours enjoying the luxurious bathtub and the assortment of relaxation oils and lotions she found in a closet. There was even a mud mask under the sink she scrubbed on her face and candles she lit to complete the atmosphere. It went a long way to make up for the crappy time she’d had so far. The bed was incredibly soft and also like, huge. It had to be some type of memory foam. Things was though that Darcy was not quite sure what the plan was now that they had made it here. The uncertainty sat heavy in her chest and her mind circled around Jane and what Jarvis meant when he said she was ‘unavailable’.

She found _Clint_ the next morning in the living room curled up on the Italian white leather sofa. The TV was muted but it looked to be that same show he’d been watching at the hotel. Little dogs in tiny cop uniforms bounding around the screen. His focus wasn’t on the TV however but on a tablet he was holding.

“Have you eaten?” She wondered as she headed into the little kitchen. The cabinets were a sleek dark wood that had those cool slow catch hinges. The high-tech coffee pot blinked cheerfully at her.

“Huh?” Clint grunted from the couch.

Darcy pulled out two bowls and a filled them with some cereal from the small pantry. She splashed some milk into each bowl and poured a cup of coffee in one of the mugs. It was probably some weird rare china clay or something. Bowls hazardously balanced in her arms she made her way over to join Clint on the couch and shoved the cup of coffee into his hands.

He took a long sip and sighed. “Oh my god, thank you.”

Darcy snorted and took a bite of her cereal. The tablet on the coffee table was showing some kind of schematics and she nodded at it. “What you looking at?”

“Bows.” He yawned and took another sip of coffee. Darcy nudged the cereal bowl closer and he took an obliging bite. “I’m going to need a replacement.” He grimaced.

Darcy resisted the urge to ruffle his hair. “I’m sure you’ll find another good one.”

“Yeah.” He said doubtfully.

Darcy stared at the TV screen for a few moments, watching a corgi interrogate a Yorkshire terrier. What a weird show. “What do you want to do for dinner?” She asked suddenly.

“Aren’t we just eating breakfast?” Clint asked around another spoonful of cereal.

Darcy shrugged.

“Pizza?” Clint suggested hopefully.

Darcy was beginning to see a pattern. Not that she had a problem with that, Darcy herself could eat the same meal for days on end and be satisfied. “Sure.” She agreed easily.

Clint went back to searching for a new bow and Darcy took the dishes back into the kitchen and deposited them in the dishwasher. With not much else to do she retreated back to her room and flopped back onto the soft bed. The quiet felt weird.

Her eyes scanned the room and landed on the bookshelf against the wall. She counted- 1,2,3,4 sides. 5, 6 – 7, 8 – 9, 10 shelves. 11, 12 front and back. 13, 14, 15, 16 wood feet. With a sigh she rolled over and stuffed her face in one of the soft pillows.

The day passed slowly.

The next morning she gave closer examination to the bookcase and grabbed a few old books. It was mostly engineering stuff which wasn’t really Darcy’s speed but whatever. Beggars couldn’t be choosers. Clint had found a pack of cards somewhere in the house and they passed a couple of hours in the afternoon playing war and go-fish on the floor of the living room. Turned out neither of them were very good at poker. Darcy very much enjoyed introducing him to Mao though. He picked up the rules faster than anything else she’d ever played with which was infinitely more fun than just handing out penalty cards the whole time.

On their third day at the safe house Darcy rose from bed determined to get out of the house. Her feet were aching for some exercise. Not running or anything, she just needed to get out. She was getting cabin fever. Clint was kind of paranoid but they hadn’t had any trouble since Chicago Darcy argued. Jarvis had had a new taser delivered for her too so she was feeling a little more confident. She agreed not to go too far while Clint continued to work on reaching out to fellow Agents. She wasn’t stupid. She’d stick nearby but she also refused to be cowed into permanent hiding.

Atlanta was an interesting city. Lots to see and Darcy enjoyed walking the little block around their hiding place and basking in the sun. It was good to just be outside passing normal everyday people on the street and not getting shot at. It was that bit of normalcy she had been desperately craving. She dropped a few coins into a cup for one of the homeless with a slight bounce in her step.

She managed to convince Clint to even come out and go to a little café with her for dinner. Darcy grinned and took a big bite of the homemade bread. The stuff was heavenly and still slightly warm from the oven. “See! Told you it would be fine!” Darcy beamed.

Clint shook his head. “Don’t say that!” He warned with a mouthful of bread.

“Are you superstitious?” She couldn’t help but tease.

Clint answered with a slight shrug. “Lots of carnie folk are.”

Which didn’t really answer her question she noticed. The smallest nudge in her brain made her smile. Once their food was done and the bill paid Darcy pulled Clint down the street.

Clint gave her a curious look but followed obligingly enough.

There was a little vending machine on the street. Darcy eyed the choices for a moment before feeding a few coins in the slot and hitting the button for bottled water. There was a click sound as something inside caught strangely and two bottles instead of one dropped into the bottom. Darcy took one, left the other in the bottom and took Clint’s hand to tug him away. “What was that about?” He asked with a slight frown.

A runner absolutely drenched in sweat jogged by them.

Darcy kept walking with a sly grin on her face. She knew what was about to happen. Could hear the exhale of grateful disbelief and the sound of the vending machines drawer opening as they retrieved the bottle. She felt Clint’s considering gaze on her the whole way back to the safe house too. It may or may not have put a bit of a pep in her step.

On their fourth day at the safe house, walking back to the hotel with breakfast she spotted the homeless man she’d seen the day before. Still curled up in the same little spot he’s form drowning in an oversized coat. The long hair fell limp and greasy around his eyes. Darcy paused.

A businessman pushed passed her impatiently.

She crouched a little. He had deep, haunted eyes. “Hey” she said softly. His eyes flicker over her and away like she might hit him. She wondered if he was a vet. She’d done a bunch of reading, when Aidan had first left. Texted him obnoxious statistics to try and persuade him to leave the military. Once he’d been put on active duty she’d kept reading – so she would be ready to help him when he came home. But he hadn’t… Anyway she knew a lot of vets ended up homeless. PTSD, agoraphobia, maladjustment, drugs and alcohol to help stem flashbacks, etc.

She reached into her pocket for some remaining change and put that down -“Be sure to eat something, yeah?” She backed away lightly, nodded at him, and continued back.

+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=

(Darcy – 9)

Sometimes Aidan could be _such_ a pain but it was days like this that Darcy remembered how much she loved her brother. The cotton candy was bright pink and stained her fingers just a bit when she grabbed a chunk. It fizzled and melted in her mouth into a delicious sugary syrup. Aidan laughed at her pleased expression.

They hadn’t been to the state fair in years. Darcy couldn’t remember how old she’d been when the tradition had been abandoned so it had been a surprise when Aidan had risen at a normal time in the morning on Sunday and informed her that he had convinced dad to drive them over and drop them off for the day. Aidan had a cell phone now so he could just call mom when they were ready to be picked up.

“Give me a piece”

Darcy offered up the open bag. He had paid for it after all. Aidan grabbed a large section of the cotton sugar. His tongue turned blue.

It was a beautiful day. Sunny and blue skied. Aidan had broken out one of this shorter sleeved black shirts from the depths of his closet. Darcy was wearing her favorite worn jeans even though they had a hole in the left cuff. She had Aidan’s old maroon beanie on her head.

A couple of little kids ran past them, shrieking in laughter as they wandered together through the crowds. Somewhere a band was playing. There was a large tent full of handmade crafts and flowers. Beautiful quilt blankets hung from the sides and overhead. There was a stall displaying adorable little bonsai trees which made Darcy coo. The bag of cotton candy was quickly devoured between the two of them during their perusal.

“Can we go see the animals?” Darcy asked tossing the empty bag into a rather full blue trash barrel. They had never gone into the barn as a family. Mom said she didn’t like the smell.

Aidan shrugged easily, “Sure.” And they set off for the large barn. The smell certainly hit them before they made it inside: animal fur, sweat, manure, and dirt. It was a little strange that it was an almost pleasant combination.

Aidan shook her arm and it flopped like a noodle, “Darcy! Look at the little cows! Oh my god!” He laughed. Darcy looked. “Oooh!” she cooed and skipped closer. They were tiny little things. She wanted to pet them. A woman sat on a tiny bench by the stall smiled at them. They spent a few minutes there admiring the fuzzy coated cows before wondering on. Rows of exotic chickens the likes of which Darcy had never seen before. Cute little bunnies in cages nibbled on hay and carrots. Darcy snuck a finger through one of the grates and gently patted the white ones side gently. Aidan teased her for being scared of the horses. Which she wasn’t. It was just that Aidan was crazy.

“They’re really tall! They’ll step on us!” She argued clutching her brother’s arm closely. She didn’t look but she knew he rolled his eyes.

“They’re in stalls Darcy. They’re not going to trample us.” 

A giant horse stuck its head over the side of the door. Darcy squeaked a little, squeezing Aidan’s arm. It was huge! She could see its enormous hooves peeking out under the crack in the stall door. It snorted. Aidan took a couple of steps closer. Darcy tried to dig in her feet but Aidan had gone through a growth spurt and was getting really strong. Her feet slid across the cement floor. She let go of his arm and clutched her own fists instead, moving back towards the center of the row. “It’s ganna bite your hand off!” She warned unhappily. “Aidan!” She drew out his name in annoyance but he just laughed obnoxiously.

“You’re going to get in trouble!” She insisted. Darcy pulled on her fingers anxiously.

Aidan stuck his hand out under the things massive head to sniff. “No, I won’t.” He told her. He was going to be sorry he hadn’t listened when the thing bit off his fingers. Only it doesn’t. It just kind of sniffed his hand and moved it lip all weird and Aidan ran a hand gently down its long face. “Come on! He’s really soft.”

Ah, yeah, no. Darcy wasn’t stupid. She was not getting anywhere near that thing. She stomped her feet a little. “Can we please just go?!”

“You’re such a little baby.” He told her, giving the monster one final pat.

“I’m just not stupid!”

“Yeah ok.” He said all sarcastically. Darcy smacked his arm. He shoved her back.

Boys were all idiots anyway.

Darcy huffed and led the way out of the barn. They headed back towards the stalls. She dragged to a stop in front of one of the food stalls and bit her lip. She tugged Aidan’s arm. “What?” He asked, glancing down at her.

She pointed at the sign then dug in her overall pocket for the little bit of allowance money she had. “Can you get me a caramel apple?” Sometimes, Darcy didn’t like talking to the people. It made her nervous. What if she counted her money wrong or they give her the wrong thing? Mom was always trying to make her practice or whatever. ‘Why don’t you order the food Darcy?’, ‘Why don’t you call the library Darcy?’ Uh- Maybe because she didn’t want to? Ugh.

But Aidan’s always been nicer then mom so he took her money and stood in line with her. “Which one do you want?” He asked as the line slowly shrunk.

“Just the regular caramel.” That’s what she got every time.

Aiden let her stand behind his shoulder as he ordered one plain caramel apple and one candy coated. He grabbed the apples by their little sticks and stuffed the change into his pocket. The plain one was passed to Darcy once they made some distance from the line.

The crunch was awesome. Sweet apple juice dripped down her chin and the caramel stuck just a little to her teeth. She licked her lips happily. “You’re not ganna eat yours?”

Aidan glanced at her and shook his head. He rolled his eyes in a ‘_what you ganna do_?’ kind of way. Darcy resisted the urge to sigh and took another bite of her apple to suppress a frown.

They wandered for a while, Darcy munching on her apple. She decided she forgave Aidan for being a jerk in the barn. It was hard to stay angry when you had delicious caramel in your mouth. They sat down on a curb together, watching one of the whirly rides Darcy hated and would never go on.

Next to them a little girl started crying.

“Oh, Kamala!” A woman who had to be her mother said in exasperation. The little girl had dropped her caramel apple on the concrete. The mother scooped the girl up into her arms as she continued to bawl big fat tears.

Aidan got up from the stoop with a friendly smile and approached carefully. “Hello Miss. Um, excuse me, would you like this one? I filled up on cotton candy so we have an extra.”

The woman eyed him a little, rocking the little girl a little helplessly. After a moment she tentatively accepted the apple. “Thank you.” She said still eyeing Darcy’s brother carefully, probably taking in the dark worn clothes and leather jewelry. The apple was twirled a little in her fingers as though to make sure it hadn’t already been bitten, then she shook the little girl softly to get her attention. “Look at this Kamala. Have another apple for you. This is the last one so be careful not to drop it, alright? Say thank you?”

The girl gave a sniffle and reached out eagerly for the apple. The wet tears already drying on her face as she clutched it close. She blinked at Aidan. “T’ank you.” She murmured.

“Thank you.” The woman said again, smiling at Aidan. “That was very kind of you.”

Aidan shook his head. “Eyes were bigger than my stomach. At least it won’t go to waste.”

With a wave and another thank you, the woman and little girl were on their way back into the crowd.

Darcy finished the last few bites of apple feeling kind of annoyed. Licking her fingers she tossed the stick into a garbage can. Aidan rocked back on his feet staring into the crowd where they had disappeared. He glanced at her and pulled his phone from his pocket. “Ready to go?”

“Yeah.” She nodded.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I may or may not be being consumed by my new work in progress. Seriously, anyone interested in beta reading or collaborating or just chatting- send me a message over on Tumblr ( nothing-suspicious-at-all ). I'm really excited for it but I'm afraid I'm hitting a road block. Hope you guys enjoy this chapter- <3


	13. Chapter 12

“Still nothing?” Darcy asked upside down on the couch. Clint sighed and flopped back on the carpet in a starfish shape.

“Nope.”

All this waiting was exhausting. Waiting for Tony Stark to stop being busy doing whatever, waiting for the Black Window to reach out, waiting for Jarvis to send an email. Ugh. And she was officially beyond her allotted holiday time. She missed Jane. Darcy lugged her body forward, let herself flop off the couch onto the floor. Clint looked to be suppressing a laugh at her dramatics. “I have to get out of here.” She complained.

“Again?” Clint glanced at her. “You went out yesterday.”

“I’m an outdoor cat, _Clinton_. I don’t do well cooped up.”

“I’ve always preferred dogs.”

Darcy pouted a little. She liked dogs too. “Well good for you.”

He sat up. “You’ll take your taser?” He confirmed. Darcy nodded and he sighed. “Ok. Just don’t stay out too long. And be careful.”

“Aye, aye!” She saluted and scrambled up off the carpet.

It was chillier today than it had been so far. She wished she’d brought a thicker sweater but she wasn’t about to go back now. Her feet kept her walking. She walked the block mindlessly. With a blink she stopped into CVS. It wasn’t busy. Darcy paced the aisles, fingers lingering on bottles of nail polish, boxes of hair dye, and bags of chips. The candy aisle was covered in little tags of yellow. Her eye was drawn to a bag of Hershey kisses.

Bag in hand she checked out and headed out back out.

Across the pavement she watched a little girl screech as she was thrown over an older boy’s shoulder. Darcy’s heart lurched for a moment before she realized the girl was laughing. “Oh my god! Put me down!” the girl gasped between her giggles. An older woman was following behind them shaking her head fondly. Her heart stung again, this time in a different way.

Darcy turned her eyes back to the sidewalk and hurried on. It was about time for her to get back anyway.

On the curb was the homeless man again. The same man she’d seen yesterday frozen in the same place like he hadn’t moved all night or day. Her eyes watered a little and she determinedly blinked them back. Talk about projecting.

Still, her hand reached into her little bag and ripped open the Kisses. She approached carefully again, just as she had last time and placed a few of the chocolates gently on the edge of his cardboard. Large deep eyes peered out at her from behind his shaggy hair. He was watching her closely. She frowned and reached back into the bag to grab a few more chocolates. His face was gaunt.

“Lewis.” Darcy froze with her arm still extended as the voice came from behind her.

The little kiss sat on her palm. She turned to glance behind her in confusion. “Clint? I told you I would be right back.”

He grabbed at her arm and she tried to swat him away. “Hey-!”

“Darcy. Get behind me.” His voice low and serious.

She did without much conscious thought. Her knees bent slightly and her eyes cast around trying to find what he’d clearly seen. Another sniper? But no, he was staring at the homeless guy who was eyeing him right back.

He pushed up from his crouch and rose to a much greater height then Darcy would have anticipated. He had looked so small curled against the building in that large warn coat. Standing at full height he was surprisingly large. The dark eyes suddenly unnerving rather than sad.

Clint said something in another language. Russian?

The guy shifted, a hateful scowl flickering across his blank face.

Darcy felt Clint’s hand push her before her eyes could catch up. He was knocking away a knife, twisting his arm around to redirect the blade. Clint reached for his gun, the guy bashed him in the face. Blood plastered across the pavement. Darcy scooted away. What was happening? _God, I’ve had just about enough of this shit,_ she thinks hysterically. Clint kicked him hard enough that he stumbled back a step. The homeless man twisted and took off down the alley. Clint took off after him. Moving on autopilot Darcy followed after.

The sun was going down and the clouds overhead were growing darker. They sky looked ready to pour at any moment. Darcy raced down the back alley, feet crunching over a pile of broken glass. Her heart was pounding. Jesus. Shit. She nearly ran straight into a dumpster cutting a corner. Then an old beat up pile of crate pallets. She kept going. On and on.

Something hard slammed into her stomach and she crashed to the ground.

Darcy jerked around and jammed her taser into the assholes leg. He screamed and collapsed. The voltage on this taser must be significantly higher than her old one. She hurried to scramble back up. The air was knocked out of her lungs when someone else stomped on her back. She struggled to gasp for breath, searching for a better grip on her taser. Her fingers found the buttons again and the prongs lit up vividly in the darkness. A boot came down on her hand and she screamed in pain. Jesus. It stomped again, this time on the taser itself and she could hear it crack. The light went out. She was going to die. Something pressed hard against the side of her back. A gun. Oh shit.

She twisted her head around as best she could. A man stood over her, nearly completely hidden under tactical gear she saw out of her peripheral vision. A heavy, no doubt bullet proof vest with FBI printed in big letters across chest and a large helmet. Couldn’t see his face, just the eyes. Oh that was a big gun. Rifle? Big gun. God.

“Hail Hydra.”

There was no bang.

Wasn’t that was a thing though? You die before you hear the gun that kills you fire?

She couldn’t-

The dude was splattered against the wall.

For one wild moment she thought it might be Clint. But he was far too tall. Then she thought hysterically, _Thor_? But he was slimmer. And why was she thinking about this when she should be running? Only she couldn’t move. Her hands were shaking and she watched transfixed as the shadow proceeded to rip off the guy’s helmet and stab a huge knife into the center of his skull. It made an awful, _indescribable_ sound. The dude who had attacked her, or his _body_ now, slid down the wall into a crumpled pile.

Suddenly there was Clint and the two were going at it. Homeless man punched the wall as Clint ducked and brick crumbled like sand. Shards flew through the air. Clint swung low trying to push him off balance with a leg sweep.

The helmet was rolling away.

Something grabbed her arm and pulled but she couldn’t pry her eyes away from the body. Just. Lying. There.

More men in riot gear flooded the alley.

Homeless dude went wild, smashing at everything and everyone. Someone was pulling at her. She saw Clint get a punch to the head and he went down.

There was a large black van.

Someone was shouting in a language she didn’t know. Homeless man was panting, shaking, and then still.

They pulled her up and into the van.

So much for their trouble free streak.

The doors slammed closed with a bang like a gun.

+-=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=

(Darcy- 10)

Mom was going to be spending Christmas with her mother in Miami. It had been a long time since they’d seen each other and her mother was getting up there in years. It was important that they spend time together while they could. Airline tickets are expensive around the holidays though so Dad and Darcy and Aidan are staying home. But it will be great because they didn’t get enough time together as a family anyway. That was the story dad told them.

For the most part it was even true.

Darcy loved her mom but she couldn’t deny that her absence seemed more of a balm then a wound. For once the house was almost peaceful. The yelling only a haunting echo now. Dad pulled out the old Christmas lights they hadn’t used in years. He and Aidan spent a good hour stinging them up while Darcy ‘supervised’ by helpfully critiquing their work. Dad put out the menorah too. Typically it was banished to the mantle place in the rarely used study but Dad placed it carefully in the center of the kitchen table. Darcy liked it better there. 

Darcy decorated a tiny tree for her room and turned her boom box radio to the Christmas music station. She dug around in her closet to collect all her red and green clothes. Aidan was less enthused by the holiday spirit. He seemed determined to be just as miserable as possible.

Darcy was ‘giving him space’ like her dad requested. She didn’t know where her father got his seemingly endless patience from but she certainly hadn’t inherited it. She didn’t know what Aidan’s problem was. With mom out of the house she’d have thought he’d have been ecstatic but whatever. While Aidan sulked in his room, Darcy brought her boom box downstairs and turned it back on to Christmas music. Dad watched curiously from the kitchen table was she searched around in the cupboards. “What you doing Darcey- dee?” He asked gently. He had papers from work spread out all over the table.

Good, they still had flour. “Thought I’d make cookies.” She said absentmindedly grabbing the little bottle of almond extract. Darcy didn’t bake often but she made cookies alright and the holidays put her in the baking mood.

“Ahh- Yum!” Dad smiled a little. He looked tired. The big shirt, pajama pants, and untamed brown hair made him look startlingly like Aidan. Martin Lewis was a programing manager at some computer security company. He didn’t talk much about his work at home but he’d done his best to share some of his computer skills with both of his children. Darcy liked it better than Aidan did but Aidan found a way to be grumpy about everything nowadays.

Dad scribbled something on his paper with a frown. Darcy cracked a few eggs into a mixing bowl while the oven preheated. She hummed and swayed a little to the radio’s tune. Aidan stomped down the stairs in torn black jeans and a large hoodie. There were dark circles like bruises under his eyes. He shoved on his beat up sneakers and a black beanie then grabbed a banana from the fruit basket. Darcy frowned at him while she stirred her bowl of ingredients with an old wooden spoon.

“I’m going out.” He muttered tersely.

Dad didn’t give him the fight he looked to be expecting, simply put down his pencil and looked over at his son. “Ok.” He said softly, “Darcy’s making cookies so come back soon.”

Aidan said nothing to that, just turned away and grabbed a pair of scissors from the junk drawer before matching out the front door. It closed with a bang behind him. Darcy would bet he was probably off to go hang around outside the police station again like a creep.

“He’s such a shithead.” Darcy said.

Dad frowned at her in disapproval. “There’s no need for that kind of language!”

Darcy shrugged. She smooshed the last of the cookie balls down gently onto the try and carefully placed it in the over. She was always nervous the door was going to slam on her arm and she was going to get burned. Successfully free from danger she put the oven mitts on the counter and set the little microwave timer. That done, she took a seat at one of the empty kitchen chairs.

Dad put down his papers to look at her. Darcy looked at the pages of notes. They looked like a bunch of intense codding mumbo-jumbo to her. Dad got up to some serious stuff sometimes. She deliberately ignored the sigh from her right. “Your brother is trying Darcy.”

“Sure.” She said.

The scribblings were tiny. Lots of sections crossed out and rewritten and then rewritten again. Dad reached out and took her hand with a soft squeeze. Darcy didn’t pull away. She didn’t squeeze back either. “Darcy.”

“I know.” She told him. Sure, Aidan was trying. Whatever. Like Darcy wasn’t? Mom was out of the house. They had a week where things could just be- normal for once. But Aidan just wouldn’t switch off. Aidan was always going. Always running. He’d run and run and never even stop to realize he’d run straight off the side of a cliff. Darcy changed to topic. “What’s all this?” she asked indicating the pile of papers.

With a final squeeze Dad released her hand. “Work unfortunately. We’re working on a new virus detection software but we’ve run into a road block.”

The alarm beeped and Darcy went to check the cookies. They looked good, just lightly golden when she pulled them out of the oven. She worked on quickly moving them from the hot tray to the cooling rack. She stopped every now and then to blow on her warm fingers. They were really hot. Her foot tapped as the song changed on the boom box to an old favorite.

“Oh!”

Darcy spun around at the exclamation. Her dad was staring at a piece of paper in disbelief. He shook his head then grabbed his pencil and began frantically scribbling. Seemed he’d figured it out. Darcy left a cookie on a napkin for him and took another up to much on in her room.

Aidan did not return until very late that night.


	14. Chapter 13

The van was speeding along. Clint was still unconscious. He was unconscious. Not dead. Because Darcy wouldn’t be able to handle it if he were dead. So he was unconscious. That was all. Darcy curled in on herself, trying to appear as meek as possible. She didn’t want to give these guys any excuse to tighten their restraints on her or gag her or whatever. The more she could move the more options she’d have.

She could hear laughter from the front, a bunch of assholes howling like a pack of hyena. She wished desperately for her taser. She wanted to electrocute them all right in the fucking balls. The joking and laughter was horrific. It grated on her ears.

She thought hatefully that these shitheads got real fucking lucky taking down the two big guys only once they had managed to nearly destroy each other.

She eyed the big homeless dude who was evidently not a homeless dude. Or at least, maybe he was a homeless assassin or something.

His body was perfectly still. A rigid tension running straight through his body. There was something feral his eyes though, a _terror_ that made her sick. He’d attacked Clint so Darcy had been pretty ready to write him off as a bad guy but being kidnapped together tended to resort your priorities. Like the superhero version of the ‘8 foot mountain troll’ thing. Form their own little golden trio. Enemy of my enemy, right?

Anyway most of the assholes seemed to want to avoid getting too close to Homeless Guy. They kept their guns on him but didn’t approach to search him. Darcy glued herself to his side for the ride. They didn’t seem anxious to get within homeless dudes striking distance despite the fact that they were the ones with the guns and homeless dude looked _terrified_. That had to mean something.

They kept the unconscious Clint on their side of the van and they _did_ search him. The gun, a couple knives, and some loose change all disappeared.

A sharp turn pushed her closer to homeless dude and she fought instinct to spring away from him. She wanted to be close for protection be she didn’t want to be _that_ close. He was still a crazy homeless possible assassin.

The van screeched to a halt and the assholes upfront unloaded and came around to pull the doors open. It was dark but for recessed lighting and Darcy would guess they were in some kind of underground garage. The assholes that had Clint shoved his unconscious body toward the door and they dragged him down none too gently. Darcy stood without thinking and would have been grabbed if homeless dude hadn’t stood up at the same time.

She stumbled out of the van door and was ushered under gun point into what looked like an office building. Not at all the type of place Darcy would guess a paramilitary evil organization would take them.

They were directed through a maze of corridors to an open room with a bigger door. It didn’t look like a cell but there was no doubt that’s what they were intending to use it for. The tossed Clint onto the room where he rolled limply. The crazy man next to her jerked to a stop. He was breathing so hard she could see his chest heaving. One of the guards waved their gun and snapped at him. She was pretty sure that had to be Russian. Another shout had him walking inside the room. Darcy hurried after.

As soon as the door slammed closed she rushed over to Clint. Nervously her hands fluttered above him. Should she touch? Should she not touch? What would help? ...Jesus. Jesus. Ok. She reached out slowly and placed her hand under his bloody nose. The rush of air that hit her palm had her sagging in relief. She was scarred to move him too much in case he had hurt his spine or head or something.

Her eyes flickered uncertainly over to Homeless Guy but he was curled up in the far corner hugging his knees and rocking back and forth like a child. His eyes were clenched shut beneath his long hair and he didn’t seem particularly inclined to continue a fight at the moment. 

Darcy stripped off her light sweater, bunched it up, and gently placed it under Clint’s head. Pulled the rest of his limp body carefully into a more comfortable position. There wasn’t much more she could do.

She stood up and walked around the barren room. The floors were carpet. That cheap carpet you find in office buildings, rough and loopy with ugly patterns. The walls when she touched them felt like regular drywall. The door was just a typical wooden door although she would bet some of those armed guards were outside it. Not really much to work with.

She had a feeling that time was of the essence here.

She reached into her pockets. Some half soft Hershey Kisses. A mini paperclip. A quarter. Jesus, ok, well it was better than nothing she tried to convince herself. The corner edge of the carpet was easy enough to rip up. She tucked the little pile underneath and gently pressed the carpet back over the top.

They couldn’t have planned to put them here. This was an office building. Not a secure prison. So that was a point in their favor probably. If she could maybe convince random angry homeless man to help and get Clint to wake up- they would be fine. Things would be fine.

+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=

(Darcy- Age 17)

Darcy learned to treat it sort of like having to go in a public bathroom in. You went in, did your business as quickly and efficiently as possible, and tried to avoid contact with anyone in your vicinity. that how she treats her requests. The older she got the less she understood her brother who always seemed to be chasing it. Her brother who steeped his whole life in this thing that neither of them understood. For all either of them knew they were cursed by Cthulhu for do random stupid pointless shit for eternity.

The letters and emails between them fall by the wayside. They just have less and less in common. And Aidan was overseas. He rarely had time to write even if either of them had known what to write about.

There’s a weapons demonstration. Tony Stark is flying all the way out to present. Brand new weapons for the army. Aidan had been excited. Or at least, that’s how she’s imagined his voice when she’d read one of his rare letters. Not about the weapons. He’s been excited to see Tony Stark.

_They say Tony Stark is going to be there! _

Tony Stark is there. And Tony Stark goes missing when the caravan gets hit. And Aidan gets blown up.

Aidan dies in Afghanistan.

It takes a while for the dead to be confirmed once the report that Tony Stark is missing hits the airwaves. But Darcy knows. Knows as soon as it’s announced that they were attacked. Knows he is gone.

There is a hole that will not heal in her chest.

A sort of hopeless grief.

Her parents are inconsolable. At first Darcy wondered if the grief would bring them together and bridge the broken relationship, instead they argue even worse than before. They throw accusations back and forth. Darcy can’t stand to be around either of them. Aiden chose for himself. He chose to follow the calling. To be the one leading forward in the dark. The _candle holder_. And she can’t deny that she’s angry at him for it. What good did it do? What purpose did it serve? Did he trade his life to give another solder a few more moments of life?

The funeral is awful.

The army sends representatives- they play the horn and fold a flag. Darcy wants to hate them too. She doesn’t. Mostly it’s nice they are there.

It’s closed casket. Aiden hadn’t just been shot. He’d been blown to smithereens. She wonders one day if the _requests_ will lead her to her death too. If she will follow as willingly as Aidan did to his. Wonders if there is a point to anything.

She shakes hands with people who murmur nonsense that’s supposed to be comforting. The line goes on forever. She doesn’t know the vast majority of these people even though they must be related to her in some way. She doesn't think most of them had even known Aidan.

Every evening she checks her phone for updates about Tony Stark. Can’t stop herself from doing it. There’s never anything and it makes her furious. At several points people try to call off the search. _Don’t you fucking dare, _she thinks with a rage. Stark must have someone who cares about him though because the search continues on despite the general consensus that he must be dead.

Darcy is just finishing up lunch when her phone explodes with alerts.

It’s been three months. Three months after went Tony Stark missing, three months after Aiden’s death. Three months and Tony Stark comes back to life.

Her mother is furious. How dare he, a playboy drunk, survive? How dare he come back when her son is gone? _Like he was really that precious to you. Like you ever gave a fuck when you had the chance_, Darcy doesn’t scream. Her dad doesn’t react much at all. Just sits and stares at the TV with a tired gray appearance. Darcy grabs his hand gently. Neither of them say a word watching the news anchors explode with explanation and theory.

There’s a press conference. Tony Stark is shutting down Stark weapons manufacturing. It’s all anyone talks about. Darcy stares at the man on the screen. He’s pale and ill looking. He was probably tortured. But he was alive. Darcy is glad. It doesn’t heal the hole. She knows nothing ever, _ever_, will. But watching the second press conference, Darcy thinks that for once, _maybe_ she understands.

“I am Iron Man.”


	15. Chapter 14

Darcy woke from a fitful half sleep against the wall. Immediately she glanced over at Clint, she’s pulled him gently away from the entrance and further into the room hours ago before she’d sat down to rest but he still hadn’t stirred. Her stomach turned uncomfortably at the revelation he still wasn’t awake. That wasn’t good right? Was he in a coma? Jesus. There wasn’t much she could do for him. She blinked back tears and tried to condole herself by watching his chest rise and fall- he was still alive.

Still in the far corner homeless man was crouched. He’d stopped rocking back and forth after a while and now stared blankly at the locked door. Darcy wasn’t sure what to think of him. He was obviously mentally ill in some way. Had to be, right? Sitting on the side of the street with those sad eyes he hadn’t seemed scary. Just lost and lonely. He’d fought with Clint but he’d tried to run hadn’t he? And Hydra had kidnapped him too so she didn’t think he was with them. But why had Clint flipped out on him?

Her lips were dry. Her stomach grumbled unhappily.

She could hear voices coming down the hall. Darcy forced herself to stand, she wasn’t going to meet them huddled in a corner. She strained her ears trying to catch anything they were talking about as they approached but it was all too muffled.

The door opened to reveal three men in black uniforms, guns held at the ready. Darcy raised her hands on instinct. Homeless man in the corner didn’t even blink. Just kept staring into the void. They bark something at him in that language Darcy was sure had to be Russian or Polish or something. He shook all over but didn’t otherwise move. The man in the center turned to her, jerked his gun in indication of the open door, “Come here.”

Darcy stepped carefully around Clint’s unconscious body with shaking legs. They grab her arm and she fought the urge to yelp. She let them pull her from the room and out down another hall. Empty cubicles and dusty filing cabinets lined the walls. She couldn’t see where they had come in from. They turn another corner, soldier’s silently flanking her with their guns. Darcy’s heart pounded. She didn’t know what they wanted from her but she was already determined not to talk.

One of the guards steps forward and opened another blank office door and Darcy was led inside. It looked like a normal old office; big wooden desk, picture frames with children’s smiling faces, and a pink embroidered kitten hung on the wall. Behind the desk was a startlingly young man. He couldn’t have been older than 18, with short brown hair and a handsome face. “Sir.” The man beside her greeted in young voice with a sharp salute. Jesus. How old were all these guys? The man, boy? He looked more like a boy than a man, behind the desk nodded at the guards then turned his attention on her. He smiled slightly, “Take a seat Dr. Foster.”

Oh.

Darcy sat heavily.

Then rest of the men shifted away from the door and into the room. The office door closed behind them. Darcy clenched her jaw as the man came around the desk to stand in front of her. He leaned his hip against the desk with a small smile still on his lips. “Dr. Foster.” He said again, looking very pleased. “This is a magnanimous day indeed.” He eyed the men standing about the room. “Well done. What’s the status on Mathers?” he asked.

“He’s on his way with the book.” One of the men replied.

He hummed, eyeing Darcy curiously. “This is a most – _fortuitous_ day for us, Dr. Foster.” He tilted his head a little. “An Avenger, the Winter Soldier, and the illustrious Dr. Foster all in one swoop. I assume you know who we are.”

“Hydra.” Darcy scowled, trying to keep her mouth under control.

He laughed a little, nodding. “Yes. So we are. In a way. We- are the _new_ head of Hydra.” He spread his arms wide. Darcy stared at his baby face and the pink crouched kitten on the wall and said nothing. He scowled a little like he had expected her to clap or something. He leaned forward into her face. Darcy refused to pull away. His green eyes were surprisingly cold. Unnerving on such a young face. “You, Dr. Foster, are our most welcome guest. And in return for our gracious hospitality you are going to build _us_ an einstine-rosen bridge.”

_What an idiot._ Jane was a scientist, not an engineer. Even if such a thing were possible, Jane wouldn’t be the one to build it. Jane modified machines sometimes but she would never be able to build something that complex without outside help. Darcy had a feeling that saying that wouldn’t go over very well though.

Stress tended to have two effects on her, either it made her blab uncontrollably or stole her words away entirely. Thankfully that seemed to be working in her favor for once. She said nothing.

The boy, she was sticking with boy, scowled and slapped his hand _hard_ across her face. She tasted blood. He smiled and smacked her again. “We can make your time here most unpleasant if you make us, Dr. Foster.” He leered. He ran a hand over her head, down her face, and slightly lower towards her chest. She jerked back without thinking. He laughed. “I’ll give you some time to settle in. Then we can discuss specifics.”

He stepped back. “Escort Dr. Foster back to her room for now.”

One of the guards stepped forward and grabbed her arm tight. She was yanked upwards.

“What about the Solider and the archer?” Another asked.

The boy glared at him. “Do nothing until the book arrives. We can reprogram the Soldier easily enough and then begin work with the Hawk.”

They all saluted him again and dragged her from the room.

On the way back they force her into a bathroom and she really thought she was going to be raped. They ran hands over her, searching for anything in her pockets. They shoved her head under the tiny sink and turned on the water. She sputtered and coughed, sipping what she could catch. One of the men led her to a stall. He stood over her as she peed. She could hear the other two laughing and joking.

Back in her temporary cell Darcy stumbled back over to the wall. She could still taste blood in her mouth. A large section of her hair was still dripping water. She was grinding her teeth, twisting her hands tightly. What fucking dick heads.

It took a while to pull herself somewhat together.

She looked across the room to homeless guy, the one she thinks they called the ‘Winter Soldier’. He had a wild look in his eyes now, dragging them back and forth across the room as if he didn’t remember how he’d gotten here. Her hands pulled up the little section of carpet and grabbed one of the now more solid Hershey Kisses.

“Hey” She called out scratchily. His eyes flicked to her and away. She scooted a little towards him, slow and easy. His head snapped to her. “Hey” She said again, feeling she actually had his attention this time. “I’m Darcy.” She said awkwardly into his deadeye stare. She pointed over at Clint’s still breathing body. “That’s Clint.” She placed the little chocolate on the carpet and flicked it towards him. It rolled a few feet, stuttering to a stop a decent bit away from him. He stared at the silver packaging. “It’s chocolate.” Darcy unwrapped one herself and nibbled on the end. Darcy let the little bit on her tongue melt and coat her mouth.

He stared at her with dark angry eyes. She scooted back towards Clint. He didn’t reach for the chocolate. Darcy held back a sigh and curled up on the carpet bedside Clint. She kept a wary eye on the Winter Soldier until sleep claimed her.


	16. Chapter 15

Being in a cell was a lot like a long car ride Darcy found. Simultaneously incredibly stressful and also, really, really, really boring.

Big soldier guy was so still Darcy would have figure he was unconscious or some kind of powered-off robot if she couldn’t see his eyes occasionally blink slowly. He hadn’t otherwise moved since her nap. The little chocolate was still sitting at his feet shining under the obnoxious florescent lights. The faint buzzing the bulbs produced overhead were starting to make her ears ring.

Buzzing aside it was very quiet.

The only exit, the locked wooden door sat unmoving.

1, 2, 3, 4 sides to the door.

5, 6 front and back of the door.

7, 8 front and back door handles.

9, 10, - 11, 12 hinges.

Her eyes were burning so she pressed them together tightly. When she opened them the door remained the same. Soldier dude had still not moved. She could hear her own heart beat in her ear. There was a groan from Clint’s prone form and she actually felt her ears move in response to the soft noise. His muscles were twitching slightly and his brow furrowed. “Clint?” She whispered but he didn’t wake.

Darcy counted ceiling tiles. Then when she finished, she counted them again. It was really difficult to tell how much time was passing. She had no idea how long they had been here already. She stared at the ceiling with unfixed eyes until it started to blur out of focus. Wondered if it would be a bad time to practice some yoga or something. How long had she been laying here? How long had they been in this room? 

Her attention snapped to the door at the sound of approaching footsteps. She froze uncertainly and closed her eyes against the bright glowing lights. Tried to regulate her breathing into something relaxed despite her pounding heart. The door opened and she could hear people enter. She lay still.

“This is suicide.”

“Don’t be a pussy, Bitch. I’ve been controlling it well enough till now.”

“We need the book. It needs to be reset.”

“Fuckin shit, if you’re going to be a little bitch go wait outside.”

“Fuck no. I ain’t waiting for Anders to catch me standing around like a dipshit.”

“Stop being a dipshit then.”

Two of them.

She could make out the blurry black uniforms through her squinting eyes. One of them laughed and toed Clint’s arm with a heavy boot. He sniggered. “Look at this fucker. Out like a fucking light.”

“Not what I’m interested in.” The other one stepped forward a little. Darcy tried to keep her breaths slow and even. “Soldat!” he yelled.

“I told you, it needs to be reset. Mathers is bringing the book.”

“I’m not waiting on fucking Davidson to get his hands on it. Mathers is just as pussy whipped as the rest of them.” He yelled again, “Soldat!”

She worried suddenly that one of them was going to see the Hershey Kiss still sitting on the carpet floor and realize that their prisoners had things they weren’t supposed to. But neither of them mentioned it.

“Go hit it.” One of them commanded.

The other laughed in stiff disbelief, “Yeah, fuck no. I ain’t crazy. It’ll take my fucking head off.”

“Jesus shit.” The other one swore. She could hear his heavy boots stomp across the room. A loud smack rippled across the room. The other guy breathed in sharply. She couldn’t see what was happened without moving her head. Her heart was beating painfully hard in her chest, reverberating in her ears.

“Cole, let’s just go. You won’t get anything from it till it’s reset.”

“I already fucking told you-“

“We can get it from Mathers before Davidson gets it. Come straight here, use it, and then get Davidson out of the way.”

The other one swore violently. There were soft thudding sounds before one set of boots rejoined the other and they both headed out. She could hear this time as the door locked. Darcy popped her head up. Winter Soldier appeared unharmed but Darcy didn’t doubt that the guy had hit him somewhere. “Are you okay?” she asked.

He looked at her then lowered himself from the rigid standing position he was in down to sitting on the floor. A metal hand slipped into one of the many pockets his black cargo pants held and pulled out the little chocolate. The silver wrapping shinned in the light as he twisted it slowly. He glanced at her. Back at the chocolate. Her. Chocolate. Well, he didn’t seem particularly injured she guessed. Slowly the metal hand began to peel the corners of the chocolate foil away. He removed it incredibly slowly, trying not to rip the wrapper. Delicate and slow until the chocolate sat completely revealed in the center. He blinked slowly at it, raised it closer to sniff at. Darcy watched transfixed as he reached out and touched it with the very tip of his tongue. 

More heavy boots at the door had her flinging herself back onto the ground to play sleeping again. Jesus what now? The door was opened and Darcy caught a glimpse of at least 2 heavily armed guards outside the door. Darcy didn’t think they were the same two who had just been inside. A bottle of water and two small granola bars were tossed in at them before the door slammed shut again. Jesus Christ. Darcy sat back up again, rubbing at the carpet burn she’d given herself.

Muffled groaning had her spinning around and rushing over to Clint. “Clint! Are you okay?” She crouched down beside him. She could see his eyes scrunch in discomfort. She wished she could turn off the lights for him. In absence of that option she held her hand above his eyes to block the lights.

“Barney?”

Darcy blinked. Barney the dinosaur? “Um- no. It’s Darcy.” She frowned in worry. “How’s your head?” His eyelids peeled back slowly and peered at her with unfocused eyes. “Clint?” she resisted the urge to shake him.

He squinted at her. “Darcy?”

“Yeah! Yes, it’s Darcy. How are you feeling?”

He groaned and laid his head back down on the carpet. Darcy frowned, “Clint! Don’t fall back asleep!” If he fell asleep again would he ever wake up? He didn’t answer so she reached out and put a hand gently on his shoulder. She could feel the muscles tight and coiled. He blinked up at her at the touch.

“Darcy.” He said, sounding a bit more normal.

She removed her hand quickly. “You made me really nervous. We’ve been in here forever!” She admitted. He squinted again and she suddenly worried something had happened to his eyes or something. Then he sighed and forced himself up into a seated position. He patted his pockets with a frown and signed again. “They took my hearing aids.” His voice just a touch too loud.

Hearing aids? Oh.

She remembered suddenly years ago, throwing a pack of tiny batteries at his feet.

Huh.

She waved her hand until he looked at her. An index finger pointed at him. Fingers shaping into an O then pointer finger up, middle finger sticking out down, thumb resting between them in the center for ‘K’. Index finger pulled down into a hook, eyebrows drawn in question. ‘You ok?’

Clint’s gray eyes watch her fingers. Flickered up to her face. “Yes.” He reassured. “Where are we?” His accent was _so_ slight she never would have known. Jesus. Just the faintest curling of the words because he couldn’t hear himself. It must have taken an immeasurable amount of effort to learn to speak so clearly. His fingers flew through signs fluidly as he spoke to. Her own signing was shaky at best. She hadn’t done this since college. She spelled out, ‘HYDRA’ slowly and figured that would get the point across. He muttered something, probably a swear. As he cast his eyes around their makeshift cell he caught sight of the Winter Soldier still sitting at the far end of the room and froze.

The soldier was turning the Hershey Kiss wrapper, now flattened into a square, over and over in his fingers paying neither of them any attention.

“What happened to your face?” Clint asked without moving his eyes.

Darcy reached up and touched without thought and felt a slight ache. It must have started to bruise. Clint’s whole body was tight, feet shifting ever so slightly like he was contemplating going after the guy again. She touched his arm, she couldn’t very well talk to him if he could hear her. He glanced briefly at her. She pointed a finger at the man who was looking more like an overgrown toddler at the minuet and shook her head.

Clint stared at her then glared back at the man. “You nearly killed my partner.” Clint told him in a bland voice that was sharply contrasted by his clenched fists. Well that would explain his going crazy on the guy, she guessed. Seemingly too fascinated by the silver shine of the wrapper, the Winter Soldier ignored him.

Darcy tapped Clint again. They had bigger issues at the moment, dude. When she finally had his attention she stumbled. Jesus. Where to start? Ok.

She finger spelt ‘HYDRA’ again, then right hand out, fingers splayed. Moved in a tiny circle. ‘Hydra here.’ He gave her a bit of a ‘no duh’ look and she smacked his arm lightly.

Pointer finger to the locked door, then to her head, and finally down to her chest to indicate herself. Fist with pinky out swerved down. Thumb outside a clenched fist. Pointer finger and middle finger down with thumb tucked behind. All fingers scrunched and bent in an open palm fist. ‘They think I Jane.’

His eyebrows came together in bafflement.

She shrugged back. _Yeah, I have no idea about that either_.

Left hand up and flat, right hand in a slight scoop rubbed against the left as it raised towards her. Finger spelt ‘HYDRA’ again.

‘New Hydra’.

She shrugged again.

Both middle fingers straight down, pointer fingers straight out flat, thumbs in the middle. Like K but pointing down. Hands moved in an alternate rotation like pedaling a bike.

Two fingers up.

She stopped to think. Jesus she’d forgotten a lot. Sentence structure out the window, she tried to remember anything that might help her communicate. ASL 101 vocabulary was not geared towards kidnapping by Nazi’s situations.

Pointer finger to the Winter Soldier.

Hands flat, palms up, pinkies touching. Open and close. ‘Book’.

Angry face, hand by mouth fingers together, flicked open. ‘Angry yelling’.

He frowned.

She shrugged helplessly again. Oh! With a flash of remembrance she pulled him over to the corner of the room. The carpet pulled back to reveal her hidden stash. Clint squatted down to look at it. He eyed the quarter thoughtfully and deft fingers snatched it up. He rolled it thoughtfully between his fingers.

“Any ideas?” She asked only to remember she was an idiot and signed it to him unsteadily instead. He shrugged.

Darcy drooped a little hopelessly. That was really not what she had been hoping to hear.


	17. Chapter 16

Clint kept carful eye on the Winter Soldier while Darcy slept. He was big. Lot of power in those lithe muscles, Clint knew. Clint’s head was still pounding from that metal fist punch to the head.

The Winter Soldier.

Shit.

Clint had known there was something else going on, beyond S.H.E.I.L.D.’s infiltration. Something hadn’t been sitting right. Then Jarvis had finally managed to relay a response from Tasha. The Winter Soldier was loose and rogue.

The invisible, _invincible_ assassin. Years ago Nat had told Clint about him while they huddled together in a cell. She had still been going through initiation then, being ‘interviewed’ by the full gambit of S.H.E.I.L.D.’s intelligence officers and phycologists. She’d been anxious to prove her usefulness and had spilled secrets freely and dispassionately.

Clint had pushed Coulson to let him room with her. In the dark they told stories of ops done wrong, whispered of their failures. The Winter Soldier, she had told him, he had shot _through_ her months back in Brazil to take out a target. Clint thought he was one of the few people who might actually scare Natasha. It had seemed unreal to hear it from a source he trusted, and he had trusted Natasha even back then. The assassin that other assassins feared. Like being told the boogeyman was really. But that was all back before Thor crashed to earth, before Captain America was found still alive in the ice, before aliens invaded New York and his mind was ripped form his head. Before S.H.E.I.L.D. turned out to by Hydra.

Clint rolled the quarter across his knuckles.

The guy just sat there staring into nothing. It was really creepy. Clint flicked the coin up into the air with a soft ping. It soared up towards the ceiling. He kept his eyes on the soldier and placed a hand out to catch the quarter as it came back down.

If it was just him he might stay for a while and see how things played out but he needed to get Darcy out of here. He wasn’t certain why their kidnappers seem to believe she was Foster, it was easy enough to find out what Foster looked like after all, but he wasn’t anxious to stay and find out. She was not trained to endure torture. His mind went to the bruise lingering on her mouth and his fingers itched for his bow.

A flick of his thumb sent the quarter up again. It landed in the center of his palm with a comforting weight. The man still hadn’t moved.

Clint was on a time crunch so he stood and walked easily over towards him, quarter tossed up and caught with every step. He stopped a respectful distance away. The brunette didn’t react. Dude looked near catatonic. Clint frowned.

The quarter came back to his hand and Clint sighed, eyed the vent across the room by the ceiling.

He headed back to Darcy and tapped her gently awake. She blinked sleepily, pushing her long brown hair out of her face. She had marks from her hands imprinted on her face. He pulled her up with an offered hand.

Clint pointed toward the vent. Darcy stared blankly at him.

He took her hand and led her closer to the far wall and pointed again.

“The vent?” he caught her lips asking while pointing.

He nodded and shook the little coin at her. Clint mimed crawling with his forearms trying not to feel like an idiot. Then his hands palms out, pointer fingers together, right hand pulling back like a door swinging open.

“You --------- crawl ---- the vent----- down ------- the door?” Clint focused on her lips. “-------------crazy? ---------------! ----too small!” Her mouth was fast but she signed ‘small’ so he got the gist.

He grabbed her shoulders and shook his head quickly and she thankfully cut off. He pointed to the door in warning and tapped his ear. He didn’t want to risk anyone hearing anything when he had no idea how loud she was being.

Clint insisted. Darcy seemed to think he wouldn’t fit but Clint was surprisingly flexible and he’d fit through tighter spaces before. It took a while for him to communicate his plan with Darcy’s limited understanding of sign. Finally, he convinced her to get on his back and unscrew the vent cover with the quarter. Then she hopped down and gave him as much of a boost as she could.

Clint pulled himself up into the tiny hole and pushed his way inside.

He shimmied his way through the vent system slowly. It was really dusty up here. Must not have been cleaned in a long time. Not surprising given that this didn’t look like the typical place Hydra hung out.

Escaping that room had been almost pitifully easy. He was almost angry that hadn’t thought to make it more difficult for him. Like he wasn’t an Avenger. Clint knew he didn’t have Tony Stark’s genius or Steve Roger’s super strength but he was no pushover, ok?

His forearms dragged him forward in the dark. As a general rule Clint was not fan of dark places unless they were small like spaces like vents. Especially when we was down his hearing aids. Being blind and Deaf at once was a lot. It was alright in vents though, with no way for someone to sneak up on him and limited access points. It always felt more like a cocoon then the horrible gaping void a full room felt like.

He fought back a sneeze when a dust bunny passed his nose.

He needed to move as quickly and as quietly as possible. He didn’t want to leave Darcy alone with the Winter Soldier no matter how docile he appeared to be behaving.

Clint fought a wave of nausea. His head was pounding. It was likely he still had a bad concussion. Ugh. He really did not want to vomit inside a vent and then have to crawl through it.

It took longer than it should have to find an empty room and wiggle the plate cover off from the inside. He was still dizzy. Clint pulled himself through the opening and flopped gracelessly on to the floor. His head pulsed painfully. It looked like this wasn’t a room Hydra was using thankfully. Just an empty desk pushed against the far wall, a dusty filling cabinet, and an old printer from the stone ages unplugged on the floor. Probably too much to ask for a convenient gun or scissors or something. His fingers acheed for a bow string.

He allowed himself just a minute to catch his breath. Get the room to stop spinning. He forced himself to stand up. He needed to get Darcy out.

He was going to have to do this quickly and quietly if he couldn’t find a weapon.

Clint went to the door and rested his hand on the wood. He wished he could put his ear to the door and see if he could hear anyone but that would be pretty pointless now. He dropped back to his stomach, eyes scanning the crack under the door out into the hallway. No feet at least. Looked clear.

He cracked the door slowly then stepped swiftly out into the hall. If the mental map he’d been making in the vents was right, he should only be a hallway and a half from the ‘cell’ door. He tried to walk in a manner that purposely soften footsteps but it was difficult without auditory feedback to know how successful he was being.

When he stuck his head around the corner to get a look at the door however it was already open.

His pulse quickened involuntarily. Shit. Had they taken Darcy from the room? Was someone in there? They couldn’t have missed the open vent cover. There was no way Darcy would have been able to place it back without help. He could feel the slightest vibrations of feet. People were heading this way. Damn. Clint burst back into the room and found an absolute frenzy.

5 combatants, hydra foot soldiers. Young and not well trained. Heavy gear.

Civilian bleeding from the mouth, pushing herself against the wall.

Winter Soldier was engaged with combatants.

Clint had seen people move like that before. It was absolute terror unleashed in a wild uncontrolled rage. The docile man-child from earlier nowhere in him now. His mouth opened wide. Clint’s left ear picked up the barest hints of a guttural scream. A metal arm grabbed the back of a man’s head and smashed it into a wall. It splinted under the force like a crushed watermelon. His flesh arm snagged one of their combat knives from the holster.

At this point one of the goons seemed to realize Clint was there- standing in the doorway like an idiot.

He needed to end this fast. He swerved left, got in close, ducked low, reached a hand out to block the gun. More combatants were flooding into the room. Clint pushed his free hand up into the guy’s _nose_ hard. He went down and Clint stopped on his face to make sure he didn’t get back up.

The Winter Soldier slashed wildly with the knife. Stabbed one in the eye, ripped it out quickly to slash at another’s throat.

An asshole managed to jab Clint in the cheek. His head rung and little dots swam in his vision. Fucking shit. He forced his feet to hold. He twisted and spun, forced the man’s arm around him and ripped it out of its socket.

A fist to the back of the head made him gag. He bend forward with the momentum and swing around. A fresh goon. If this didn’t end soon there were going to be even move coming through that door and they would be truly screwed.

Combatants 2….1….0. Clear.

Clint panted hard. His chest was burning. The Winter Soldier was stabbing a book. Over and over and over in an unearthly like wrath. Shards of paper floated through the air. They landed like snowflakes in the pools of blood staining quickly with the dark color.

Civilian status? – Darcy?

His head was pounding. The ground swayed unsteadily beneath him and he resisted the urge to gag again. He located her. Still against the wall. No major visible injuries. He staggered over. She was saying something. Speaking fast. Too fast to lip read. Lip reading was a lot of bullshit anyway. You could only really follow like 25% of a conversation that way and that was when you’re able to guess the topic. Inferencing what words they were using. Nat was actually more skilled at it then he was. Clint only really used it in conjunction with his hearing aids. Filling in gaps here and there.

Darcy had a small gap in her front teeth. It was kind of cute. Clint used to have shitty teeth until SHIELD. Then he could afford dental. But Darcy’s little gap was small and cute. She was kind of cute in general actually. He didn’t often think about that kind of thing. People thought he was with Natasha most of the time. They had never been like that together though. Clint didn’t really feel that way. Or at least, it tended to take him awhile to get there. And Natasha seemed happy there was someone who didn’t see her that way either. So that had worked out well.

Darcy was still talking. He’s a little sad he couldn’t hear her. Hearing aids weren’t cheap. It was a dick move to steal them. He’d have to see if he could still access any of his accounts and get some funds otherwise it was going to be a long while without them.

Wow Clint felt awful. Like that time he feel off the high wire and broke his leg. Barney had laughed at him, called him an idiot, but he had helped him back to their tent.

His stomach was burning.

He threw up all over his shoes and passed out.


	18. Chapter 17

Darcy’s shaking hands withdrew from under Clint’s nose. _Again_. Like some hellish deja vu. Jesus shit. He was still breathing. Must gotten hit in the head again during the fight. He would be fine though. He would be fine. There was a weird taste in her mouth. Blood. One of the assholes had backhanded her. He was dead now. They were all dead. But Clint would be fine. He would be fine.

A horrid smell flooded her senses as she was pushed up against a wall. A slippery hand at her throat. Her eyes watered. She stared at the Winter Soldier. His hair was a long, greasy, tangled mess, that shielded his eyes. He was splattered in vivid red like something out of a fucking horror movie. _He still has the knife_, she thought vaguely. The blade pushed up against her throat. It was still warm with all the blood of the cooling bodies around them.

“Who are you?” He demanded gruffly like they hadn’t been stuck in the same room together for 1- 2 -3 days? The words were thick and strongly accented.

“Wh-What?” She couldn’t breathe.

“Who are you? Why do they want you?” His voice was graveled and soft but getting steadily angrier.

“I- I’m Darcy.” 

“Why did they want you?!” He insisted.

He pressed the blade harder and she felt the sting of a cut. It burned horribly. She had a wild thought that she really hopped none of the jackasses that had bleed on that knife first had an STD. You could get those from blood contamination couldn’t you? That was a think she thought she’d read about once. “I-I-I don’t know dude!”

Footsteps echoed down the hallway. An alarm was ringing. “Freeze!” “Put your hands up!” “Drop the knife!” More people. Panic coursed through her.

The Winter Soldiers cold eyes glowered into her for a split second longer, then he turned and slung Clint’s unconscious body over his shoulder. He seized her wrist with his other hand, the metal one still wet with red, in a tight grip and pulled her out the door. He dragged her along behind him, narrowly avoiding bullets. Darcy’s ears were ringing painfully. He kicked a locked door once. It bowed in the middle. Another kick had it flew off its hinges.

They stepped outside.

It was raining.

They were running. Darcy’s side burned painfully under her ribs, struggling to keep up. Her vision was quickly hindered by the water splattering on her glasses. Around a corner he kicked open a manhole cover and shoved her toward the opening. Darcy went. The ladder was rough rusted metal beneath her fingers. He drops down after her, not bothering with the ladder and shoved the cover closed. Clint’s head flopped like a dead fish against his back. But he was fine. He was fine. They ran more. Something leaked into her shoe. Her wrist was on fire in his grip.

Left, Left, Right, Left. Darcy lost track. He pushed her towards another ladder and she climbed. Slid the cover open with shaking arms. He pulled himself up and out somehow without banging Clint’s head.

More running. Around a corner. Then another. Into an abandoned building.

He shoved her inside.

The door slammed closed.

Darcy collapsed to the dust covered floor. Her knees rang with the impact. There was another room across form her. She crawled to it. Up against the far wall she sat and wrapped her hands around her knees. She was shaking.

She was cold.

A memory came back to her then. Of a fall day years ago. She must have been in middle school. It had begun to poor icy rain on the walk back from the bus stop. Aidan had been sitting on the front steps shuddering in his black hoodie. It turned out they had both forgotten their keys that day. Miserably they had huddled together on the front steps, just under the lip of the roof to avoid the downpour. Dad hadn’t gotten home until 4 hours later and Darcy’s backpack had gotten leaked straight through. He’d written her a note for school explaining what had happened and excusing Darcy’s ruined homework. It was a miracle neither of them had gotten sick.

Darcy sat there for a long time she thought.

Everything stiff. And hurt. She was cold.

She turned her head slowly. The large man was watching from the doorframe. Clint was laid out on the floor like a corpse. But he was still breathing. She was kind of dizzy. She turned and vomited on the floor. Not much but bile came up.

The Winter Soldier crouched into view a few feet away. Tilted his shaggy head like a curious feral dog. “Why did they want you?” He asked again. Softer than he had in that room but still insistent. He rolled a water bottle across the uneven wooden floor. It hit her foot with a gentle tap. She stared at the bottle. The shine of the plastic against her wet jeans. Her hair dripped water. She watched it bead at the end of lock and fall, splashing on the dirty floor.

She was cold. Her hands were shaking.

She wondered if she was in shock.

How do you get shock? Could you die from it? How do you treat it?

She sat and breathed. Shivering slightly.

She thought a long time passed. She didn’t know how long. Eventually she hands untangled enough for her to reach out to the bottle of water. The plastic felt strange beneath her fingertips. She unscrewed the cap and took a sip, spilling some on her already wet shirt.

She breathed and scooted a little closer to Clint. She placed a hand gently on his chest to feel the rise and fall. Just to be completely sure.

Taking another fortifying breath, she looked up.

The Winter Soldier was still in the room she realized but he was farther away near the door. He was sitting on a rickety folding chair and gazing at a Hershey kiss, the one she’d handed it to him right before their cell door had busted open. He must have managed to keep it on himself during the fight. He put it very gently down beside his chair on the floor.

She took another sip of water.

Feeling a little steadier, Darcy scrutinized him. Took another sip and finished the bottle. “Th- Thanks,” Her voice broke slightly, “for the- uh- the save back there.” She finished cautiously. Her voice was extremely hoarse. 

His head flashed in her direction. She could feel his eyes on her even in the darkness of the room and the shadows beneath his long hair. 

Thor, she forcefully reminded herself, was a thousands of years old Norse god. She got along with him and he must have killed thousands of more people then this dude. And he would have been using Mjolnir too. For a moment she saw that knife stabbing through that guy’s skull. Imagined it not a knife but the blunt, crushing force of a hammer hitting that guys face.

She breathed a long breath out.

She nodded him. “I’m- I’m Darcy Lewis.”

She wasn’t…not sure how to play this.

He’d killed a shit ton of people in front of her. He’d threatened her with a knife. He’d saved her from a whole group of Nazi assholes and then sort of seemed to kidnap her? He’d brought Clint and he certainly hadn’t needed to. She wasn’t sure what’s going on anymore. She wasn’t sure where he stood. She licked her lips mouth feeling kind of thick.

She took in the rest of the room- there wasn’t much. No windows. Just the door, the rickety folding chair, a small pile of clothes, a backpack, and a thin rolled up blanket.

“So, you’re like, against those guys too huh? The Hydra guys?” 

He ignored her, looking now at Clint.

Her arms were burning and she rubbed lightly at her wrist. She shifted a little on the floor. Very slowly she moved to rise.

“No.”

She froze. He had moved to stand in front of the door. She wondered if he was going to kill her. Or rape her. Or something. God. He seemed to struggle with himself. “You will…You will stay.” He commanded with wild eyes.

“Oh yeah, no, yeah big dude. I’ll- I’ll stay right here.”

He watched her, scrutinizing every movement. Darcy sat gently, slowly, back down on the hard floor and made a show of getting comfortable. She tried to offer a smile, not sure it worked.

Sitting seemed to have been a good choice thought because his shoulders dropped slightly. Darcy leaned back against the wall feeling every ache in her body. Her wrist was starting to bruise. Her feet were still in the now sewer-damp shoes. Recoiling at the thought she kicked her shoes off each of her feet. Then slipped off the damp socks while trying to avoid touching them as much as possible. She could feel gunky residue of some kind in between her toes.

Ugh. Fucking vile.

The man was settling down by the door, eyes still trained on her. He didn’t come any closer though, which was reassuring.

She pulled Clint a little closer to her and put a hand back on his chest. She stared at the floor boards. Counted the sides of one of the planks- 1,2,3,4. Then 5, 6 for the top and bottom. 7, 8,9,10 for the next board. 11, 12 for the top and bottom. 13,14,15,16 -17, 18. 19,20,21,22 - 23, 24. Her eyes were heavy. 25, 26, 27, 28 - 29, 30…


	19. Chapter 18

When she woke Darcy had an awful crick in her neck. She blinked and rubbed at the pain. Her wrist was bruised well and good and had swelled up during her nap. She touched it gently and determined it probably wasn’t actually broken at least. The little first aid kit and thin blanket she had seen yesterday (?) was sitting about a foot away from her. Darcy glanced around. The man, The Winter Soldier, had moved. He lay in front of the door now facing towards her, head on the backpack and arms wrapped around himself. His eyes were closed. He seemed out of it.

Darcy scooted over and drew the First Aid kit closer. There were bandages, band aids, Neosporin, Tylenol, a cold compress, and a few other bits and bobs. She wrapped her bruised wrist as best she could. Used a wet wipe to gently clean the knife scrape under her neck before pouring some Neosporin on it and covering that with a huge Band-Aid. She used another wet wipe on her hands and feet, trying to get as much blood and sewer residue off as possible. Very quickly the wipe turned a disgusting rusty black that made her want to gag. Finished, she snapped the box gently closed and pulled the little blanket over towards her.

Her clothes were mostly dry now but she was still cold. She tugged the blanket around her like a cocoon and laid down rather than back up against the wall. She watched the still body of the man guarding the door. That metal arm of his was unnerving. Was he trying to keep people out? Keep her in? Both?

He hadn’t had to give her the first aid kit she was startlingly aware. Or the blanket she pulled a little closer to herself now. Huh. She squinted a little. He had the Hershey kiss right beside his head now like some precious treasure he didn’t want to lose.

Darcy didn’t manage to get back to sleep but it must have been maybe an hour before he woke. Her stomach made a loud grumble and he shot upright with alarming speed. He was definitely glaring.

“Sorry. I’m hungry.” She whispered even thought there was no real reason not to talk at normal volume.

He stood up.

Shook himself like a wet dog.

Darcy shifted herself more upright, still clinging to the blanket like a child.

The Winter Soldier grabbed the little chocolate in his huge hands. Holding it gently, like it might be made of glass and shatter, he shuffled over towards her. Like he was scared of her. He stopped a good foot and a half away and crouched down. The stink that came off him was putrid but she was certain she didn’t smell any better by now. He put the chocolate on the ground and pushed it towards her. It rolled a little ways. Darcy picked it up slowly. She really didn’t want to startle this dude. Grabbing hold of the top, she pulled it carefully open to reveal the chocolate inside. 

He watched her closely as she unwrapped the chocolate, bit the little stem of the Kiss off then held her hand out to him.

He plucked the remaining chocolate out of her hand by the wrapper. Turned it over curiously. Pulled on the little tail paper that had been sticking out the top. Delicately touched the silver wrapping foil. He bit the chocolate with his teeth uncertainly. He stared at the rest of it in his metal palm. Made a sound Darcy couldn’t identify but found heart wrenching.

“I know this.” He said so softly Darcy could hardly hear. He gazed at the chocolate _desperately_. Closer up she could better see his face- unshaved and hallow. Deep set striking blue eyes. She wondered maybe if he had amnesia rather than some kind of psychosis like she had been guessing. She’d been thinking more neurological disorder maybe. Did amnesia cause violent tendencies? She didn’t know a whole lot about it.

Feeling cautious but not as scared of him as she had been last night she carefully asked, “Do you like it?”

He shivered. “Yeah, Becca… swell…” He blinked slowly at the chocolate, the words coming out slightly slurred like he was drunk or drugged.

“- uh good,” She wondered if she should correct him or not. Probably better if he didn’t get too confused she reasoned, “I’m Darcy though.” He looked at her with wide eyes. “I mean, you can call me Becca if you want. That’s fine. I’m down with that dude.”

He turned his face away from her muttering “_Darcy”_ under his breath. Repeating it over and over like he was trying to drill it into his head. Slowly he picked up the last chunk of chocolate and set it in his mouth.

“Yeah. I’m Darcy.” She pulled the blanket down a little and pointed, “And that’s Clint.”

The Soldier’s eyes glanced to Clint’s still unconscious form. He made a face, scrunched his nose unhappily and muttered something in Russian. Maybe a curse? Almost certainly derogatory.

“He does seem to be a bit on an idiot.” Darcy agreed sympathetically resisting the urge to reach out for Clint’s vulnerable body. “Attacking you on the street and all, but his heart’s in the right place I think. He’s made a good meat shield so far. Saved me a bit so there’s that.” He was back to staring at her and Darcy’s mouth unhinged to cover the awkwardness, “I typically work with Jane Foster. Thor’s girlfriend, she’s a big deal scientist if you weren’t aware. But sometimes my brain makes me do stupid stuff, ya know?” He nodded while Darcy plowed on, “So I end up in Chicago of all places, in the back of an alley straight out of a _nightmare_ and found this guy next to a fucking dumpster and then people were shooting as us so we-“

“You.” Darcy shut up at the considering tone and blinked back at him. His brows were pulled together. She made an encouraging sound at his silence. “You are- you are making…” He trailed off. He gripped at his hair. Darcy scooched back a little eyeing that metal arm nervously. He rocked a little, back and forth, clutching at his hair. It took a good five minutes or so for him to calm and which point he dropped his hands and stared blankly at her. He seemed to have lost track of the fact they had been having some kind of conversation.

Things grew quiet again. The abandoned house was eerie in the awkward silence. Her neck was still stinging slightly from the cut beneath the bandage. From somewhere in the walls there was a faint scratching noise. This place was probably infested with mice. She could hear Clint breathing.

She tried to ignore the Winter Soldier still watching her with a frantic gaze like she was hiding the secrets of the universe from him. “Hey, huh, why were you sitting on the street?” If he was on the run from HYDRA like they were, it was a little strange for him to be so out in the open, right? Surely a legendary assassin would know better than that?

He stared at her.

She blinked back. At his continued blank stare she repeated herself.

The second time seemed to get through to him. He tilted his head slightly. “Gotta make a buck.” He said softly, an intonation in his voice that hadn’t been there before. He was looking away from her now, eyes staring off into a void.

She wasn’t ganna question it. Instead, she nodded. “Oh yeah. Sure. That makes sense.” _Even though you’re an assassin/spy thing and should probably be able to just steal money if you need it_. She shivered a little. “So we’ve been here a while. We’re probably in the clear for now, right? Clint and I have a safe house. If we go there we could rest up and contact the request of the Avenge-“

“No.” His icey cold response startled her. In her mind she watched again as he drove a knife straight through a man’s skull. He turned away from her and sat back down against the closed door. She could hear him muttering to himself. “Buck buck. Buck. Real _swell_ buck. Buck, buck, buck.”

He sounded like a fucking chicken. Darcy wrapped her arms around herself and clenched her jaw. Everything ached. She blinked and tears ran down her cheeks.


	20. Chapter 19

(Aidan)

The bumpiness of the Humvee rolling along the dirt roads was familiar by now. Aidan had been here long enough for all of it to become familiar. Routine. The oppressive heat. The uneven dirt ‘roads’. The occasional explosions. Gun fire. The weight of his bullet proof vest. Things he had never imagined become accustom to.

All of it familiar.

Aidan sat in the back, the warm dessert air causing sweat to drip down his uniform. It was ignoble with typical determination. Still at least this was finally a bit of a trade off. Something almost new. Aidan glanced over and suppressed a smile. Thomas was fangirling over their change.

Tony Stark was everything Aidan had expected him to be. Exuberantly charming. Funny and personable. Handsome. Smarter then was probably good for anyone. The way he talked could be a little overwhelming, like his mouth was somehow running faster than his already fast brain. A little full of himself sure, but he reminded Aidan of Darcy in some imperceptible way.

Thomas was falling all over himself which was amusing. Normally the guy was pretty level headed. Guess being in the presence of your hero would do that to you. It wasn’t just Thomas though. It wasn’t long before Stark had everyone in the Humvee splitting in laughter. Even Jackson who was normally a hard-ass killjoy.

He forced his left leg to stop bouncing.

The reason he was here was finally, finally, approaching.

He could feel it like a sickening, exhilarating lurch. He’d been waiting for this for so long. He shifted a little. A warning was tingling the back of his neck and he shifted his grip on his gun. Thomas moved in for a selfie. Laughter forced its way out from Aiden when Stark ribbed the guy for throwing up a peace sign. “Please, no gang signs.”

Something explodes.

They slam to a screeching halt. Gunfire.

“Get down!” Aidan shoved Stark’s head down as bullets rain down on them.

He loses track of what’s happening, just running on training that’s become so instinctive to him now he acts without thought. He can hear Stark scream, asking what’s happening. Aidan shoves the door open into a hail of bullets. Something hits his foot. Grenade. He reaches down and chucks it as far as he can. Away. Away from Stark. He fires into the chaos. Isn’t even sure he hits anyone.

He’s trying to draw fire away.

He’s moving away from the truck, from Stark, something clicks when his boot steps down.

Then there is nothing.

White.

Screeching.

Bullets.

Screams.

He couldn’t move.

Aidan was numb all over.

Shapes blurred around him. The whole world whirling. His ears were ringing. He could taste blood. Coppery and hot on his tongue. He was sure he was supposed to be in pain. It did sort of hurt. But far away and farther and father. 

He felt a little ill.

Hot under his lip. Like he might vomit.

It was really hot.

_Stark._ Aidan thought he was still alive. He had to be.

He was- Aidan was sure. Stark was alive.

The tug that had been pulling at him for years and years faded slowly to nothing. The quiet inside him was so very strange. He hadn’t been able to recall what this felt like. To be without the urge. To be done.

Aidan could hear someone groaning. He was too tired to respond in kind. He hoped it wasn’t Thomas. Hoped Thomas got out. Somehow.

It was getting cooler now.

Cold and numb.

But Tony Stark was alive. He was sure that was what the whole thing had been about. Didn’t know why. Just that it had _needed_ to be done. Knew it the way people know how to breathe. 

Unbidden a memory came to him. Years and years ago, laying on a bed by his little sister. Her dark hair an unruly, unbrushed mess. Those blue eyes of her slightly red from crying. The now hallow flicker of excitement he’d felt when he realized that he was no longer alone. That his sister was just like him and it was going to be them against the world. Bloody, cold lips murmured the words he’d spoken that night, “we’ve got like, super powers or something Darc’.”

**+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=**

Darcy was starting to get nervous.

Very nervous.

One might almost possibly call it panic-y even. 

Clint still hadn’t woken up. She knew concussions could be bad. Really bad. He could be bleeding in his brain too for all she knew. What the fuck did she know? Darcy held onto his left hand awkwardly, squeezing in a way she meant to be encouraging and occasionally shifting her fingers to feel his pulse. It was still there, pumping, not that she really knew what speed it was supposed to be going at. Should have paid more attention in High School health class. It felt like something she should know.

She took a steading breath.

Darcy had wrapped the thin blanket around him a few hours ago for lack of something helpful to do. She fussed with it a bit now, tucking the sides and smoothing bumps uselessly. The thin sweater she’d been using to cushion his head back in their office prison had been abandoned to HYDRA during their escape and she wished desperately for it now.

Jesus, he could be in a fucking coma or bleeding out inside his brain or his skull could be fractured or –

Ok. Ok.

“I think we should leave.” She told the man huddled in the corner as calmly as she could. This was the fourth time she had told him this in the last few hours. It was a fight to keep the frustration from her voice. She wasn’t sure if he was ignoring her or not hearing her or _what_ but like all the previous times she’d tried, the Winter Solider didn’t respond. She sighed and fussed some more over the stupid blanket.

Leaning back against the wall she took another shuddering breath. The Winter Soldier remained unmoving from his dark corner. Clint’s chest rose and fell softly.

Up and down

Up and down

Up and down

Darcy blinked. She must have dozed off again for a little while. Her mouth felt disgusting. There was still some kind of residue on her toes she could feel when she scrunched them despite her earlier efforts with the wipe. Her whole body was still aching. Winter Soldier was still sitting with his back against the door. The repetitive muttering seemed to have stopped although whether that was a good thing or not she wasn’t sure.

Clint still hadn’t moved. His face was really pale.

Darcy took a breath. “Hey,” Her voiced cracked, “Winter Dude?” His eyes swept over and focused on her. “The coast has got to be clear by now.” Her fingers ran gently over the top of Clint’s head just brushing the tips of his messy hair, “He needs help.” The Winter Soldier said nothing. He had that stupid Hershey kiss foil between his fingers again but he was still looking at her. “We need to leave.” She told him again.

He turned his face away from her in clear dismissal.

“Fucking shit.” She swore under her breath.

Sticking her hand under the blanket she grabbed hold of one of Clint’s right hand. The rough calluses were thick on his fingers. _Must be from pulling his bow_. 

When she and Aidan had still been little, Aidan had theorized about their ‘powers’ a lot. Wondered if they could make the requests happen on command, if they could manipulate things without a request ever even coming in, if they could influence an outcome to specifically be bad or good. Darcy had never bothered to give it much thought. She’d sit on Aidan’s bed while he talked and talked, munching on snacks and shrugging occasionally.

Her one attempt to really control anything had been her spectacularly failed experiment in high school where she had tried to turn it off entirely. The results of that had swiftly and harshly taught her that it was impossible. A candle did not stop glowing until it was blown out. She had never attempted to ignore her ‘gift’ after that but neither had Darcy ever tried to consciously use her ‘gift’ either.

It had never seemed like an option. Fate just did what it wanted. It led her along. She didn’t do the leading. But she was starting to get desperate because Winter Soldier would not be convinced that leaving was a good idea. No matter how much she pushed that Clint might be in serious danger, that he needed help, the Winter Soldier just wouldn’t budge.

And he wouldn’t let her leave to go get someone to help Clint either.

With no fucking idea what else to do she closed her eyes and tried to- look inside herself or something. Recalled the feeling of that pull on her brain, on her heart. She’d been doing it her whole life, she knew what it felt like. That feeling of certainty. Of knowing.

It just was. Just would be.

_Clint was going to be fine. Clint was fine. Clint was awake_, she tried.

When she opened her eyes it didn’t seemed to have done jack shit. Darcy bit her lip harshly. Water was building in her eyes which she blinked back bitterly. So fucking stupid. What the fuck did she think was going to happen? Darcy looked over at the fucking Winter Soldier still blocking the one door. “We need to fucking leave.” She told him with desperation bleeding into her voice, “He needs help!”

He blinked slowly at her like the words were going in on ear and right out the other. Jesus. He wasn’t even processing what she was saying was he? Right. Ok. She’d had enough of this. She was sitting in gross clothes, sewer gunk still stuck between her toes. She needed a shower, and new clothes, and desperately needed to find a toilet. Her patience was gone. Done.

Darcy gathered her courage, felt her determination swell within her. She was going to have to face this like she faced a science-drunk-crazy Jane. Time to pull her shit together. “Look at me,” She demanded.

He was rocking slightly again.

“Hey!” Darcy barked, “Look at me!” She forced herself to her feet. Every limb throbbed. Like a baby dear new on its feet her legs wobbled dangerously beneath her. “Look at me!”

His wild eyes locked on hers.

She forced herself to get closer, get inside the bubble of personal space and hold her eyes to his. “I need your help.” She told him slowly and sharply. His eyes skittered away from her and back, a pleading fear there. But it wasn’t a rational fear Darcy told herself. They couldn’t stay here. Determined not to be swayed she caught a glimpse of that damn candy wrapper he was still holding on to. “Ok look, you want more chocolate? I will get you more chocolate,” Darcy promised, “I will get you bags and bags of chocolate. But- we. are. leaving.”

He muttered something in a defeated tone in that language again, Russian or Polish or whatever then stood on shaky limbs.

Darcy took a step away from him as he stood, he was really tall.

Right. What to do about Clint. They couldn’t just leave him here and there was no way Darcy was going to be able to carry him. That left one option really. “I’m going to need you to carry him, alright? Gently. ” He took an uncertain step towards Clint, eyeing her the whole time like she was about to attack him. At her approving nod he scooped Clint up into his arms like the grown man weighted nothing.

That decided Darcy put her hand on the door knob and pushed.

They walked silently down the filthy, dusted hall to the front entrance.

It was dark outside which gave her pause. She could have sworn it should be day time. She sleep schedule had to be all kinds of fucked up. A pleasant breeze blew past and thankfully wasn’t too cold. Darcy paused on the front steps of the abandoned building. She’d half expected to be surrounded the second she stepped outside but there was nothing. Just a quite normal street. She could feel the presence of the Winter Soldier behind her, Clint unconscious in his arms.

Darcy glanced about the street. Trying desperately to hold on to the courage she had mustered to get this far she picked a direction and started to walk.


	21. Chapter 20

The question, now that they were actually moving, was whether or not to take Clint to a hospital.

The Winter Soldier trailed behind her, Clint held gently in his arms like an overgrown baby. Darcy’s bare feel were littered with little pebbles from the sidewalk but her shoes had been a lost cause and there had been no way she was jamming her feet back inside them while they were still sopping wet with sewer water.

She’d been worried other people would react to their presence. Three wounded, dirty people wondering the streets, but it seemed everyone was just assuming they were homeless or something because no one bothered them. Really it was like they were all trying as hard as they could to collectively ignore their existence.

They walked.

With no map and no really familiarity with the city Darcy led them at random. She had no idea where they were going. Maybe they’d hit a hospital they could take Clint to. But-

She cast her mind back to their visit to Stark Industries headquarters. Clint hadn’t had an ID to show the front desk she remembered. What would happen if they brought him to a hospital without an ID? Could they claim they had just found him and didn’t know him? But Clint could literally be brain dead or something. On the other hand with HYDRA after them would it be safe for him to be in a hospital alone? So, maybe no hospital? And leaving Clint in a hospital would leave her all alone with Tall, Dark, and Murder-y which did not sound like something Darcy wanted to sign up for.

The fresh air had been so soothing, freeing, after all that time hiding in that dusty room but now she couldn’t help but wonder if she hadn’t made a mistake.

Her feet picked up the pace. Behind her the Winter Soldier adjusted easily to keep pace with Darcy’s puffing. Buildings past in a haze. Jesus she had no idea where they were. Her mind was racing. Was it safer to duck down into a smaller side street? Less people to notice them? Or was it safer to stick to the busier street? Would HYDRA risk garnering that much attention? Ugh, Darcy was not built to handle this kind of stress!

A thought struck her so abruptly she froze like she just walked into a pole.

Darcy turned to look at the Winter Soldier.

He looked at her with a blank face, not at all winded from carrying a few hundred pounds of dead weight in his arms.

“Do you- Do you know how to get to your corner from here? The one you sat at?”

He nodded silently.

Jesus she was an idiot. “Great, I’ll just- let you lead the way then.” Sheepishly Darcy stepped aside to let him lead. He blinked uncertainly at her for a moment and Darcy wondered if they were going to have to have that whole conversation again but then he turned and started walked back in the direction they had come from. Because of course.

They walk for hours.

Like, at least three. Darcy’s feet were black on the bottom and she was deeply regretting not wearing the gross sewer shoes now.

Finally, just at the point where Darcy was considering asking if the Winter Soldier _really_ knew where he was going, they turned another corner and there was the little patch of cardboard sitting on the ground. It was soggy but otherwise just the same as it had been the last time she had seen it.

Oriented at last a burst of excitement hit her right in the chest. 

Safe house. Help for Clint. A shower, food, bathroom, all so close now.

She picked up the pace again.

The little door was just as inconspicuous as they’d left it and seemingly untouched. Approaching the door handle she was very greatly the lock was key pad activated and not key based because it would be fucking awful to get this far and be locked out. She dialed the code slowly. The small led flashed green and with a twist the door slid open to the decorative little foyer.

There may or may not have been tear son her face when she turned to the soldier still hovering in the doorway. “Come on. Come in.”

He took a slow step across the threshold, eyes sweeping the room.

He trailed after her like an uncertain puppy as they made their way into the living room and kitchen area. The TV was off but the stack of cards were still spread-out where she and Clint had left them from their last Mao game. Jesus, how many days ago was that?

Darcy directed the solder to deposit Clint on the sofa then ran to the bathroom as fast as her aching, bleeding feet could take her. She relieved herself, washed her hands, and then awkwardly forced one foot at a time under the faucet to at least get the worst of the filth off. That accomplished she stuck her head under and drank deeply. She hadn’t realized just how thirsty she had been.

The Winter Soldier was right where she’d left him when she wandered back to the living room. Literally had not moved.

She frowned uncertainly, “Do you want to shower? This place has great water pressure. I was going to try and get in touch with someone who can help Clint.” At his blank stare she sighed internally. She should probably be grateful she’d gotten as much out of him as she had today.

Darcy sat gently on the coffee table looking at Clint.

She grabbed her laptop, still sitting by the couch where she’d left it forever ago, and quickly typed an SOS to Jarvis. Clint was going to be ok. They were safe and Darcy was sure Jarvis would send someone to help Clint_. Everything was going to be fine_. _Heal, heal, heal_. She put as much into it as she could for all the fucking good it would do. Darcy looked up startled at the Winter Soldiers gruff voice, “You.” He was staring at her, “You, you make the headaches go away.” He said softly. There was something comfortably like _awe_ in the lines of his face. Darcy shifted awkwardly, “Oh. Really? That’s surprising. I’ve been told I tend to cause those, not cure them.”

“Where is Clint?”

Both of them jumped this time. The Winter Soldier spun to face the pale, red hair women who stood in the door way. The Black Widow. There was a coldness in her expression that matched the Winter Soldier inch for inch. A sleek black hand gun was aimed steadily at the soldiers head.

‘He’s right here,’ Darcy wanted to say but it got stuck on her tongue and she could only stare.

The soldier was muttering something in that gruff language again. The mechanics in his metal arm shifting. He glanced at Darcy as though looking for her permission at which Darcy frantically shook her head ‘no’. Absolutely not.

“I’m here Tasha.” A tired voice called. Darcy blinked in shock. His eyes were still closed but Clint was waving a heavy hand over the top of the couch before it flopped back to his side.

Black Widow took a step into the room, eyes and gun still trained on the Winter Solder. “Clint?” She called.

“S’all good Tasha. Also, I think the Winter Soldier may possibly not be working for HYDRA by choice.” Clint muttered with his eyes closed. “So that’s a thing.”

Her shoulders loosened and the gun slowly lowered slightly.

The Winter Soldier was squinting at her. “You- Your, the Widow.” He said softly.

“You remember that?” She asked coolly with a raided eyebrow.

“I…It’s all jumbled. It’s…its coming back.” He shook his head slightly as if to dislodge a thought. “You going to call – captain? S-Steve?”

“How did you get here so fast?” Darcy blurted out. Black Widow glanced at her, sizing up the Winter Soldier who was still frozen by Darcy’s side.

“Jarvis called me. Reported you guys missing. I was coming to your last known location to scout.”

Oh. Well that made sense. 

With a considering look at the soldier, Black Widow holstered her gun and stepped around to look down at Clint. “You can’t keep out of trouble for one week alone can you?” She scoffed but the fondness there was pretty undeniable.

Clint peeled his eyelids back just a bit to look at her. “Glad you’re ok, Tasha.”

The woman hummed noncommittally. She eyed the soldier again who has avoiding her gaze and was staring at Darcy instead. “Will you stay if I call him?”

The man gave a jerky nod.

Black Widow nodded in turn then ran a gentle hand over Clint’s head. “Wait here, you idiot.” She told him and then stalked off into the depths of the safe house like she’d been there a million times. Maybe she had.

Jesus.

Darcy grabbed one of Clint’s hands before she could stop herself. “Are you ok? I mean, obviously not but like, how are you feeling? You were out for a long time.”

“Yeah. How did we get back here anyway?”

Darcy nodded at the solder standing eerily still beside her. “Had some help. He demands payment in the form of Hershey Kisses though. So, were going to have to pay that off.”

Black Window returned in short order with the first aid box. She asked Clint a bunch of memory questions, shinned a pen light in his eyes, and declared there was nothing wrong that she could tell. Clint sat perfectly still while his scrapes were cleaned. He had large bruises around both eyes now, probably from getting punched in the nose but his gaze was steady and sharp.

At Darcy’s insistence not to attack the Black Widow, the Winter Soldier had gone back to ignoring everyone and was taking part in his favorite past time of staring at Darcy. She didn’t think he meant to be creepy on purpose though so she was going to allow it for now.

“I feel fine.” Clint told a deeply unimpressed looking Black Widow.

The red hair women glared at him, “You will stay in that couch until medical arrives or I will tie you to it myself.”

Clint leaned back on the couch pillows.

It only took a few hours for the safe house to be flooded with people. A doctor and a couple of nurses, a couple of security people, Captain America, some black guy with a metal backpack. Plus Darcy, Clint, Winter Soldier, and Black Widow made for a tight fit in the place.

Black Widow, Captain America, and the dude with the metal backpack were all huddled in a far corner around a stressed looking Winter Soldier. Darcy wasn’t quite sure what was going on over there. Lots of whispering and Russian or Polish or whatever. Darcy was leaving them to it.

Clint wined in annoyance as a nurse stuck an IV in his arm. “I feel fine!” he pouted.

The doctor rolled her eyes clearly used to this kind of behavior from patience. “You’re pupil response looks good but you were unconscious for a number of hours. It would be best to get an MRI just to be sure you’re not bleeding internally.” The lady flipped some pages on her clipboard.

The other nurse finished rewrapping Darcy’s wrist and patted her arm gently. “Any other injuries you want us to take a look at?” She was eyeing the bandage on Darcy’s neck in concern.

Darcy shook her head. “It wasn’t that deep. I put some Neosporin on it. I think its fine.” It itched and stung like a bitch though. The nurse frowned but turned away and Darcy perched herself back on the coffee table by Clint’s head. The doctor had moved on to the other group of hero’s and was eyeing the Winter Soldier.

Darcy stared down at Clint for a moment. The bruising around his eyes was looking incredibly faded...like weirdly faded and healed compared to when Darcy had last focused on them a few hours ago. She blinked but the bruises remained this new faded versions of the dark purple color Darcy remembered. Those bright gray blue eyes of his focused in on her just as sharp as ever. Was it weird that she found them kind of reassuring now? “What?” he asked, “I got something on my face?” It was a weak joke but Darcy smiled a bit anyway. _What happens now_? She had to get in touch with Jane of course. But would she ever see Clint again after this? What were the chances they’d just randomly cross paths again? “Darcy?” 

The words came out before she thought them through, “Want to go on a date some time?”

He blinked at her. The faintest sheen of red crept up his cheeks which was incredibly cute. Then he beamed, “Yeah.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> NOTES:  
The reason this new baby HYDRA branch is so ready to think Darcy is Jane is because Jane had been captured by another HYDRA fraction and had been adamantly claiming to be Darcy. 
> 
> This was also interestingly enough why Tony was ‘unavailable’. He was busy mounting a rescue attempt for Jane. 
> 
> The key to Aiden’s mission was his tossing of the grenade set to detonate the Humvee. Tossing it aside allowed Tony time to exit the vehicle and ultimately live to become Iron Man. 
> 
> A deleted scene set early in Darcy’s childhood had Darcyy responsible for Peter Parkers parents meeting. She was compelled to steal a ball from Gym class and chuck it down a hallway without looking. This ball hit a man in his face and unfortunately knocked off his glasses. A very kind women sees this happen and helps him out. 
> 
> There is a small cameo from Kamala Khan as a child (aka Miss. Marvel). I know very little about her except vague ideas about her powers and just threw her in because I could. 
> 
> There are no tunnels, to my knowledge, under Chicago. There are cities that do have underground tunnels, like Portland and I literally almost rewrote everything to make it accurate before deciding to screw it. If I can have super heroes, I can have underground tunnels in Chicago. 
> 
> If it wasn’t clear, Natasha showed up so fast because she was already on her way. Jarvis had managed to get a hold of her after Clint and Darcy went missing and she was headed for their location. She just happened to arrive right after the crew make it back on their own. 
> 
> Aidan was not supposed to be as big a deal as he became. 
> 
> Hershey kisses really were around in Buckys time so I used them as a small thing that's helped to jog his memory.
> 
> This whole thing was inspired by learning the history of the phrase ‘can’t hold a candle to-.’ In that before street lights young boys used to be employed to walk ladies home at night by illuminating the street with a candle. Pretty easy job so of course it was not a good thing to say, ‘you’re not worthy of even holding a candle to something’. I don’t even know if that's all true but the concept was so interesting I started thinking about those people who hold metaphysical candles to people and bring out their best. It spiraled from there. 
> 
> END of Notes
> 
> Thank you again to everyone who read, kudos, commented. I know I sort of fell by the wayside in responding to comments but please know every single one really meant a lot to me. I hope you are all staying safe in these crazy times. You are all always welcome to come chat with me over on tumblr where I go by 'Nothing-suspicious-at-all'. <3

**Author's Note:**

> writing this has been a roller coaster. I loved it, then I hated it, it took forever to finish, then I liked it, and now I'm not sure how I feel about it. But it is complete, just over 47,000 words and I can't look at it anymore so I am posting it.


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